MrJones
Well-known member
I'm not sure how to say this but it's something I have in my head and it doesn't matter what people say, I can't seem to change my mind easily.
The thing is that I feel like I've hurt people, good people, and so feel like I'm a horrible person. I feel like I deserve nothing for being like this, for what I've become, for failing my family, not being good enough, being always weak and coward.
I feel like the only thing I deserve is feeling awful for being an awful person. I try to be a good person, a better person than I was, yet I can only seem to do things wrong, to make people feel bad.
I'm afraid I won't ever feel better until I stop feeling like a horrible person, but I don't know how to change that. It doesn't seem to matter what people say, I feel like a lost cause.
I just don't know what to do anymore, I try my best and everything goes wrong, I try to do nothing and everything goes wrong, I try again something different and it goes worse. I feel like the best for me would be to slowly vanish and everthing would be better.
I don't remember the last day I didn't cry... but still I feel like I should suffer more for what I've done and for what I let happen.
The thing is that I feel like I've hurt people, good people, and so feel like I'm a horrible person. I feel like I deserve nothing for being like this, for what I've become, for failing my family, not being good enough, being always weak and coward.
I feel like the only thing I deserve is feeling awful for being an awful person. I try to be a good person, a better person than I was, yet I can only seem to do things wrong, to make people feel bad.
I'm afraid I won't ever feel better until I stop feeling like a horrible person, but I don't know how to change that. It doesn't seem to matter what people say, I feel like a lost cause.
I just don't know what to do anymore, I try my best and everything goes wrong, I try to do nothing and everything goes wrong, I try again something different and it goes worse. I feel like the best for me would be to slowly vanish and everthing would be better.
I don't remember the last day I didn't cry... but still I feel like I should suffer more for what I've done and for what I let happen.
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