Does Being Shy and SA go together

The LostOne

Active member
I was reading another thread on here and it seems a lot of people think if you have SA then you are most likely shy, which got me wondering if its true?

I dont think im shy or outgoing but somewhere in the middle, what about everyone else?
 
Good question. I've always thought that I was kind of shy, a little more quiet than most people, but never thought there was an actual condition that covered the spectrum of physical symptoms I'd been getting. Not been diagnosed with SA; I kind of refuse to go to the doctor about it - not keen on the idea of counselling. :confused: So, I don't know - for now I'll say that I'm 'next to normal.' ;)
 

Emmaa

Well-known member
I'm not shy, in fact I could (and sometimes can be) a confident person. But I often wonder if this is sometimes an act.. Lol, I don't even know myself!
 

JamesSmith

Well-known member
Shyness is SA. I think that saying someone is shy is a nicer way of saying someone is socially anxious. What is different from these two words is SAD which is on a whole other level. SAD is when shyness controls your life so much that you flat out avoid many social situations, and when you are in social situations you avoid talking, eye contact, stuff like that, to the extreme. When someone has SAD it means they practically have a disease that impedes their ability to function socially.
 

Feathers

Well-known member
Well, I think shyness and SA are on a continuum... from mildly shy to almost impossible to have contact with people or homebound (though some people with agoraphobia apparently can have contact with people too..? so that seems to be on another continuum..)

I can be both shy or SA or 'talkative' - depending on who I'm with and energy levels and how I feel etc. I've repeatedly tested as I/ENFP (or other stuff) in the online tests.. Also, people who are shyer than you can think you are '(more) talkative/outgoing/assertive'...
 

Minty

Well-known member
Lol, I'm glad I'm not the only one who was confused by this.

I guess everyone has their own definition of shy. To me, shyness is what others in this thread are saying: social anxiety in its mildest form. Everyone gets shy about something, whether it's approaching someone of the opposite sex or performing in front of an audience. Shyness is not something foreign to people who don't have SA. We are all wired to experience shyness (except psychopaths) at some point or another.

Shyness also has nothing to do with energy levels. When you get into energy levels, you're talking about extroversion vs. introversion. Both extroverts and introverts can experience shyness and social anxiety, though I imagine it would be much more difficult for an extrovert to have the disorder. Introverts who lose energy through socialization can also rarely feel shy. They just tend to be reserved to keep their energy, whereas a shy person would be reserved because of the anxiety they are feeling.
 

*Amy*

Well-known member
SAD is an extreme shyness which `prevents you from having social interaction with others. So, my question is, is it possible to haave SAD and not being shy? :confused: I don't think so.
 

Kristof

Active member
I think if you are shy you are more likely do develop SAD but the two don't have to go together.
I have both but i can still go to work, the store, festivals and so on.
Everyone's level of shyness and SA is different.
 

The LostOne

Active member
I guess im strange I never really thought of myself as a shy person but definitly feel I have SA. I guess it effects people in diferent ways, maybe I am shy?
Im just trying to understand how SA effects others so I can better understand my own problems.
These are a few of the issues I have can people relate to them?

I never want to talk to others and get really anxious around people, large or small groups or one on one it doesnt matter. The thought of speaking in front of others freaks me out totally, im worried im gonna say something dumb and everyone will think im an idiot or they will see how nervous I am and think im strange.

I cant concentrate on a conversation cause im too worried that im constantly being judged.

I get nervous just leaving the house worrying the worst is gonna happen.
to the point I cant go to the superstore to shop any longer, I get everything delivered.

Ive probably been out twice in the last 5 years and it was a disaster.
 

Minty

Well-known member
I guess im strange I never really thought of myself as a shy person but definitly feel I have SA. I guess it effects people in diferent ways, maybe I am shy?
Im just trying to understand how SA effects others so I can better understand my own problems.
These are a few of the issues I have can people relate to them?

I never want to talk to others and get really anxious around people, large or small groups or one on one it doesnt matter. The thought of speaking in front of others freaks me out totally, im worried im gonna say something dumb and everyone will think im an idiot or they will see how nervous I am and think im strange.

I cant concentrate on a conversation cause im too worried that im constantly being judged.

I get nervous just leaving the house worrying the worst is gonna happen.
to the point I cant go to the superstore to shop any longer, I get everything delivered.

Ive probably been out twice in the last 5 years and it was a disaster.

Hmm, could be wrong but this sounds like AvPD? I don't think people with just SA are confined to their homes. This is an avoidant behavior. Or maybe even agoraphobia if the fear is being away from your home vs. being afraid of encountering people. I have AvPD and sometimes I'm scared to leave the house but I don't have agoraphobia. I just am scared to encounter people and have to socialize. If there were no people in the world, I'd totally go out, everywhere, all the time. Haha.

I'm curious-- how do you define shyness?
 

The LostOne

Active member
In humans, shyness (also called diffidence) is a social psychology term used to describe the feeling of apprehension, lack of comfort, or awkwardness experienced when a person is in proximity to, approaching, or being approached by other people, especially in new situations or with unfamiliar people.

Now I've read this I realise that I am shy it sums up how I feel excactly.
I always thought being shy was more about being timid.
I think I have a mix of SA + AvPD.

Sorry for any confusion although Ive suffered for many years Im only just starting to try and understand what my problems are.
 
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