When I get over S.A I know I'll be a better friend and a better lover, so I don't see the point of having a below-average dating experience now. Relationships are hard work and my heart is fragile at the moment, so I want to repair the foundations first.
Dating is putting yourself in a very precarious position. It would be like saying that you want to cooke, but have no intention of eating, the entire rational has to be questionned. Some people do not have SA severe enough that it will prohibit them from doing these things, but as we see, for a great many sufferers, it gets complicated and they end up losing control of the situation and get hurt in the process. If it is your intention to meet people, then why not simply do that with friends, or new people? Dating is putting yourself out there for a relationship. Using it to fill your own need to 'meet' women is actually quite selfish and simply wasting their time. I don't agree with that at all. If you want to get over your SA then work through the right channels. If you are ready to date, with a view of what it potentially lead to, then that's fine.
I have been doing putting off dating for a few years now.
I regret it, there were several good guys that I passed up on.
There is always something in your life that is not perfect, I want someone who can deal with that.
I have put off a lot of things actually because I wasn't perfect yet.
I think it was just a way to justify avoidance to myself.
Not to sound morbid, but you never know how long a shot you have at life, and putting things off always seems like a bad idea when our time here is so finite.
If I'd chosen not to date until my SA was gone, I'd never have dated.
My SA is part of my personality, so it's never going to be gone. I can work on ways to lessen its negative effects on my life, but it's always going to be there, and anyone I'm in a relationship with is going to have to deal with that, just as I'll have to deal with their issues, whether SA related or not.
I'm never going to be a flawless person without any hangups or issues, but then neither is anyone else. The way I look at it, you just have to get on with life. It's way too short as it is, and I don't want to miss opportunities because I don't think I'm "good enough" yet.