being a tomboy, is it wrong?

[popolala]

Theres nothing wrong with being a tomboy, but theres something wrong if you are unhygenic and wearing clothes that smells or provocative outfit, thats wrong.

so your fine. at least your not doing drugs and smoking, the more you wear this, your parents will get used to it. parents are like that...

 

[deleted user 1]

Hello,

I thought I'd make a topic about this.
I like to wear comfy clothes, and casual style or sportive, baggy.
But my invironment doesn't support me, so many people bullied me, just because I like to wear guy clothes, baseball caps, sneakers, and since 3 weeks I got short hair, but I do like to wear some feminine things as well, because I know it looks good on me. But lately I've been having the urge of not listening to all the beauty fashion society, bcuz lately I've been pissed off about this. I started to observe how people are focussed on the beauty aspect, Since I focus on this, I started to be irritated about all the judges.
In the past my best friend is a female-to-male-transgender, everyone was joking about me and making fun out on us, I would never want to transform to a guy like she does, but bcuz I used to hang out with her, my family got the wrong ideas, they tell me ''It's wrong to be a girl in guy's clothes, it's not right''
My parents rather want me to be a feminine girl with long hair , wearing make up and skirts and heels. (ok, maybe no heels, but that's the ''image'')
I don't want to be like that, and i'm afraid it's the only way society works to find girls attractive, I've been so confused about this, that I even dated only feminine girls in the past, and ignored the tomboys. because I was afraid of coming home with a girl which isn't the right image. Now, I have a girlfriend whose sportive/casual as well, and since I'm with her, I started to realise it's not bad to be this way, comfy clothes are very nice to wear, and people should have respect for this. But Ok, a little feminine is attractiv, but the barbie doll, please no paris hilton. I like girls with ambition that's what i wanns see. (p!nk - stupid girls) In the past I used to wear guy clothes everyday, ok maybe that's a little too much, but now I do in combination. But still I love the tomboy look, I can't help it. I also like the feminine rock chick attitude, just a little combination now and then. But I'm tired of all the comments. I just bought a baseball jacket, I weared it, and people called me ''Dyke'' on the streets. Guys asked me, If I was a guy or a girl, they were laughing in front of my face, how mean is that? People's opinions are too bad.

This keeps my mind busy all day long, because I cannot be what I wanna be.
I don't like to be the stereotypical mega butch, but I just want to be dressed casual, Do you think it's wrong to be a tomboy?

Soo.. that's it. So much left to say,
But that's for another topique because it's another subject.

greetings!

Be who YOU are! stuff what the media puts in front of you. If only you knew who owns the media, you wouldn't be so willing to acknowledge them! In reality, there are all different types of people who appeal to a multitude of others. Personally, my preference is a feminine and petite woman, but my ex wasn't. Trying to appease others is not cool, and it's quite easy for others to pick up on it.

 

[deleted user 1]

Theres nothing wrong with being a tomboy, but theres something wrong if you are unhygenic and wearing clothes that smells or provocative outfit, thats wrong.

so your fine. at least your not doing drugs and smoking, the more you wear this, your parents will get used to it. parents are like that...

You hit the nail on the head. As long as you're not a skank (or unhygienic! lol), then all that matters is who you are.

 

[coyote]

talk about "wrong"

if I remember correctly, anyone who actually dressed like that got beat up

(at least where i lived)


by the way, Saskia - i think athletic, sporty girls are hot

 

[N0D]

the girl i lost my virginity to in high school was like my best friend and a total tomboy wearing baggy guys clothes and she had short hair at one point. I tell anyone who tries to tell me how to live my life exactly where they can shove their opinion. Also I think there are lots of people who would like how you aren't so hung up on the girly thing all the time.

anyway to answer you're question, hell no it isn't wrong to be a tomboy.

 

[superfluouslyme]

If being a tomboy is wrong (and it most definitely isn't), then I don't want to be right.

 

[DespairSoul]

Hello Sassy,

No isn't wrong being tomboy. Remember: " Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."

I like that quote Well but i know is sometimes hard be who u are because others want u to be something else. Is just about u not about them and what they think is right or wrong! Do what say your heart.

 

[LazyHermitCrab]

No there isn't.. it's not like most girl wear dresses nowadays but if it were victorian clothing then it would be more fun

 

[geekyloaner]

No there isn't.. it's not like most girl wear dresses nowadays but if it were victorian clothing then it would be more fun

I like the 20's my self what other era of cloths does everyone like. Oh deja vu what am I supposed to do deja vu lol. I gitty today Oh and I have x who is a tomboy she is gay not saying you are, but just saying i fall for them smiles!!!

 

[nicole1]

I like to wear comfy clothes. But I'm straight. I use to hate being labeled a lesbian (nothing wrong with them, but I'm not) and I just hate people assuming anything about me. I wear comfy to kinda baggy clothes b/c my self esteem... I also wear feminine clothes and don't wear make up.
You are great no matter what and people should realize that. It's not you, it's them.

 

[Seb]

Tomboys tend to be more interesting since they aren't more concerned with their personal image rather than their personality.

It's probably good for you to know that you'll get along with guys easily because you'll have more common interests and won't be fashion obsessive.

 

[twiggle]

The people who judge you for what you wear are the people who waste too much money on looking good/dressing well. Such a waste!

I just like to wear what's comfortable at the time - leggings/long tops (oh and a fair bit of pink too Sorry)

The more comfortable you feel the happier you are. And laugh at people who try and "look sexy" in a pair of 5ft tall heels they cannot walk in

 

[nicole1]

The people who judge you for what you wear are the people who waste too much money on looking good/dressing well. Such a waste!

I just like to wear what's comfortable at the time - leggings/long tops (oh and a fair bit of pink too Sorry)

The more comfortable you feel the happier you are. And laugh at people who try and "look sexy" in a pair of 5ft tall heels they cannot walk in

You said it best!

 

[popolala]

talk about "wrong"

if I remember correctly, anyone who actually dressed like that got beat up

(at least where i lived)

LOL , thats so funny xD ::
because it sounds true...

 

[Lawrens]

No it is not wrong to dress and act the way you like to, don't worry about people judging you, it is often those same people who tries to apply their own concept of gender roles onto everyone else, who says a guy can't be "feminine" and a girl can't' be "masculine"?

 

[Marund]

you don't have to be girly!! i am a tomboy and nobody makes fun of me. I have long hair but i never wear make up accept powder. I wear flannels and and I love to shop in the guy's section at vintage stores.

I think it is because of your transgener friend. God thats dumb and im sory, but i dont know what to say. There is nothing wrong with being a tom-boy at all. I've never run into this I hope everything works out for you. You should move to a big city to get away from all that crud. Big cities are a lot more tolerant of this stuff..

 

[kerunia]

We live in the 21st century where people decide what they like and what they dont and if you like to wear guy clothes thats your right. Theres plenty of different UNUSUAL styles nowadays some dont even compare to being a tomboy( lady gaga..)( I dont see why people would judge you wearing baggy pants and oversized tee's. Its what I wear most of the time.).And theyres also the "natural products" movement. So wearing minimal makeup is actually IN. I dont know maybe it only applies to the Americas and Europe is different...
Try to find people in your city who are just like you and hang out with them and this will probably give you more confidence.Otherwise just like Marund said : move out to a big city were no one really cares...
Good luck!

 

[A friend]

Although I'm a guy, I'd say that being a tom-boy isn't wrong, because it might

make relationships (friendship/romantic relationships) between guys and girls

better/easier/stuff like that, due to the common interests and things of that nature.

 

[*Amy*]

You have to wear a style in which you feel comfortable. If it's baseball caps and jackets, let it be. The bad thing is that we SAD sufferers give too much improtance to everybody else's opinions. **** off them. The most important thing is that you like yourself.

 

[theslowesthand]

Tomboys tend to be more interesting since they aren't more concerned with their personal image rather than their personality

I'm starting to think i might be the most "attracted" to tomboys with short hair. There just seems to be more "substance" to them. They seem more staright-foward, genuine, interesting and nice, with none of those awful flirting/sexuality manipulative mind-games, etc, etc. Yes, as Seb said, they have more personality - which as it happens, can make make a women way more sexy/alluring/etc than most normal women (imho).

On the put-downs, it is possible that the perpetrators (being bullies) somehow pick-up on your fragility/sensitivity, and so its the animalistic "attack the (seemingly) weak" that kicks-in inside their brains. Also since they view you as "an easy target" (ie are confident you wont retaliate) it gives them a suitable way of engaing their "pain-body" with yours (this is a concept of Echart Tolle's). Their pain-body wants itself to suffer, and it wants to view others suffering (the ratio varies). When these conditions exist, the pain-body has a "good feed" of what it needs, and so it keeps on existing (self-preservation).