Avoidant, or on your own island?

[NotAfraidJustBlah]

Hey. Well, I think.... all humans start social. We want friends, to be 'cool or popular', etc.

But, if we find that we're just... not, we sorta want to feel we are 'choosing' to not have friends. A form of self protection.

So it starts as avoidance, but later turns to us 'choosing to be alone', and for some unfortunately it turns into 'well, everyone sucks, so I'm better alone'

And they become those self-absorbed who live on their own island.


I just think it's best to be honest about this stuff. Some people, who are so beautiful and talented, sometimes CAN be on their own island. I mean, if you can afford to support yourself and never have to worry about being homeless and "needing" a friend, you can be on your own island.

But, most of us aren't. What do you all consider yourself??

 

[KiaKaha]

I like the metaphor.
I think you are right. I have always thought that people tend to justify their feelings and behaviour...and its not just with lack of friends, I think its with everything. You can see it particularly clearly with criminals. Trying to justify their actions with excuses rather than admitting that they did something wrong.

I think we tend to think of ways to make us feel "OK" about who we are, and where we are in life. I have never had a lot of friends, and unfortunately that has lead me to believe that making an effort with people isnt all that worth it... justifying my own thoughts and behaviour.

Being self sufficient is a nice idea, but I dont think it would ever happen...unless you know...you are chuck norris or something.

I am not entirely sure I have interpreted your thread correctly, but I thought I would respond with my own thoughts on the matter.

 

[Kiwong]

I don't think everyone sucks, I don't avoid the things I enjoy, but I prefer my own company most of the time. I get involved in the world quite a lot and enjoy it, but I like to retreat into an idependent lifestyle. I'm introspective that's a part of my personality. Being cool or popular has not been a desire of mine at least not since high school. I am comfortable with where I am at in life, I am gald things worked out the way they did for me.

 

[Falkor]

I think I would like to live on my own island for two months. just to carry myself together and really live on my own to get stronger and peace at my mind.

 

[stevelee24]

ive always wanted to live on a deserted island, but i would still like a link to civilization

 

[Flowers-Of-Bloom]

I just prefer being alone. Is that so wrong?
I don't think everyone sucks though, I just fear them and feel safer when they're not around. It's a matter of self-preservation, so maybe it is selfish.

 

[HermitFox]

I think I'm on my own island. well, I know I am. but I feel like I'd rather not be. though I haven't used any lifeboats. =/

there's probably a way to master the solitude, but, bit of a mystery to me..

(I joined ages ago, but I went quiet, quick...I'll try not to be a lurker - off topic - woops, sorry)

 

[fitftw]

I didn't ask for this life, and unfortunately it's not in the cards for me right now to afford living on my own.

If I could, I'd live by myself forever and almost never have people over, except family members, and sexual intercourse.

 

[razzle dazzle rose]

For some time I did choose to avoid people and making friends. I was dealing with some things that took up pretty much all my time. Now, it is not a choice. I don't want my own island. I want to be with other people and experience life. Being popular is not one of my goals. I am not meant to be this lonely person. I have SA.

 

[Nothingness]

That'd be great! I fantazise about it sometimes! I've been on islands before. My favorite was Diego Garcia! I could imagine me and the cat living alone on a tropical island!

 

[OceanMist]

I don't hate everybody. In fact, I like most people.

I wouldn't like being on an island by myself because I believe as humans, we need to be around other people to function in a healthy way.

Being on an island would be dangerously depressing. I'd go crazy, probably.