Any Alcoholic Social Phobics?

[EvilFlyingCow]

I admit it. I love to drink. It's the perfect cure for my social phobia. Get a certain amount of beers in me and it's no holds barred. I stop caring what people think of me and speak my mind.

Not to say this hasn't gotten me in trouble on many occasions. But is there anyone else out there who deals with their social anxiety the way I do?

 

[Helmaninquiel]

No. But sometimes I think I should become an alcoholic or at least sometimes go out and drink with people, I might live a little.

 

[CZi]

@EFC: I'm with ya there brother. I was a classic example of textbook binge drinking. I've never drank alone, never had the urge to buy and drink alcohol or any of the "typical" alcoholic symptoms, but when I drank in social situations, I DRANK. Yeah you and I both found it worked, damn well I might add, but it's not sustainable and it will come back to nip ya eventually. It took me multiple nips and a huge bite to finally get that into my head. Plus, depending on a substance to function sucks, and towards the end when my body became hardcore effecient at processing the liquor, it'd take me way too much to get drunk. As a result: BLACK OUTS. So I wasn't even remembering if it was helping me enjoy the social situation or not anymore lol.

@Helmaninquiel: no u! Drinking in moderation is fine. Drinking to get drunk for the sole purpose to wash sorrows/insecurities/pain away is not. XD

 

[_Hope]

I can understand why people would do it as I myself used to rely on alcohol to take away some of my anxiety when I know I have an extreme anxiety provoking situation to contend with. I used to rely on it for so much such as going to Tesco... A shop... KFC... The beach... Or just leaving the house... Meeting new people and things like that, I always felt I better have a drink to take the edge off.

Granted it sounds bad but I wasn't an alcoholic or anything like that as I didn't need to drink it or crave it in fact I HATED drinking and didn't get wasted just enough to relax as I was so afraid I couldn't cope if I didn't have something to take a bit of my anxiety away.

It doesn't solve anything though, sure it helps at the time there is no denying that but its not a solution to the problem long term. I no longer do it and feel so much better for it, I soon realised I can cope without having to down some vodka/whisky/beers or whatever to go to the shop etc... And realising that was an amazing feeling.

Its taking that first step and believing in yourself and that you can do it all on your own, nothing wrong with a sociable drink in moderation though just try not to rely on it for everything because its all downhill from there.

 

[nothingtofear]

I'm extremely susceptible to alcoholism so I don't drink. There was a point when I realized I had no social phobia when I was drunk so I started taking every chance I could to drink with people so that feel better about not having a life (because I had one, not that that's any more of a life than I have now but you know what I mean) and also of course just to have fun.

Alcohol is an extremely slippery slope for me personally. I never want just a buzz, I want to get drunk. A couple beers seems totally pointless to me... but the drunker I get, the more I want to drink more. I'll be tipsy and thinking "OK just this one last shot, I'm already too wasted" and then "OK OK one more, this is the last one for real" and the more wasted I get the more I don't give a **** and the more I want more. Sure, it's great having no social anxiety, having confidence and having fun - but I hate everything else about who I am when I'm in that state, it's not me. After a night of heavy drinking, I wish I didn't remember the things that I do remember. All that applies for me when I'm just an occasional social drinker but being a social drinker led me to be a habitual drinker. I'd drink because I was depressed and I'd drink because I was bored. I spent about 6 months being drunk 4 to 7 nights a week and sometimes drank in the morning... sleeping problems, diarrhea, wasted money, and a continually degrading quality of life weren't for me, so I quit. I didn't cut back, I just quit. I'm fortunate it was so easy, I don't think I was a heavy/frequent drinker for a long enough period of time to develop the kind of dependence that real alcoholics do. I can't remember any major withdrawal symptoms other than the urge to get drunk. It's been two years.

I've read that people with Social Anxiety often self medicate with various recreational substances and it made me realize that I used smoking weed to cope for a few years even though it actually exacerbated my anxiety sometimes. It allowed me to be care free, relax and enjoy the company of a fun group of friends but also sometimes made me extremely paranoid and anxious around people and even by myself as I considered the possibility of running into someone or obsessively analyzed some recent social interaction. I've also done MDMA. On MDMA, I can't stand to be alone, I crave people to interact with and feel extremely lonely if I don't have them. I'm basically the opposite of my socially anxious self on MDMA, I turn into an extreme extrovert. Unlike when I'm drunk, I don't notice any negative changes to my personality on MDMA and I actually feel like it brings out some really great qualities in me so after my first experience I was very intrigued by the notion of using it for casual socializing with people who don't know I'm on it who maybe people who wouldn't approve (a very very bad idea, thank god I never did this)... but that stuff has an extremely high potential for abuse and when you abuse it, you'll regret it, so I've given that up too.

All of these substances that I've experienced using just alleviate some symptoms at best, they aren't a cure for the underlying psychological condition. Perhaps in moderation, you could enjoy that symptom relief in a somewhat responsible way, but although they alleviate some symptoms of SA, the side effects are just new symptoms you get in place their place just aren't worth it for me.

 

[CrzyDrmr]

Definitely helps loads. I'm usually kinda quiet and reserved in social settings, but once I have a couple drinks, I stop giving a damn. Which isn't good really, because that isn't me. It's just the inner me coming out, who is normally too worried to do so for fear of how I'll be perceived. Doesn't fix the problem, only makes it go away for a while.

Although it can be fun, it gets old. I got tired of feeling like crap and relying on something every night in order to ease my nerves. In the end, someone should really only drink in moderation or if it's to help them along in a social setting. Just choose what you do and say very carefully...

 

[Hastings & Main]

"I'm not an alcoholic, I'm an enthusiast."

"ANYone can be a non-drunk. It takes a special talent to be a drunk. It takes endurance. Endurance is more important than truth." - Charles Bukowski

OK, I'm not an alcoholic, that gene's just not in me. But I do love a tasty drink, and I particularly enjoy the benefits of feeling happy and forgetful for a short while... once in a while.

 

[nothingtofear]

"I'm not an alcoholic, I'm an enthusiast."

"ANYone can be a non-drunk. It takes a special talent to be a drunk. It takes endurance. Endurance is more important than truth." - Charles Bukowski

OK, I'm not an alcoholic, that gene's just not in me. But I do love a tasty drink, and I particularly enjoy the benefits of feeling happy and forgetful for a short while... once in a while.

LOL

...and is your name a reference to the intersection in Vancouver??

edit: I'm an idiot, of course it is

 

[Hastings & Main]

Yes, and well-acquainted w/it.

 

[lunarla]

I like the drink

 

[Helmaninquiel]

@EFC: I'm with ya there brother. I was a classic example of textbook binge drinking. I've never drank alone, never had the urge to buy and drink alcohol or any of the "typical" alcoholic symptoms, but when I drank in social situations, I DRANK. Yeah you and I both found it worked, damn well I might add, but it's not sustainable and it will come back to nip ya eventually. It took me multiple nips and a huge bite to finally get that into my head. Plus, depending on a substance to function sucks, and towards the end when my body became hardcore effecient at processing the liquor, it'd take me way too much to get drunk. As a result: BLACK OUTS. So I wasn't even remembering if it was helping me enjoy the social situation or not anymore lol.

@Helmaninquiel: no u! Drinking in moderation is fine. Drinking to get drunk for the sole purpose to wash sorrows/insecurities/pain away is not. XD

I know, I know. lol I would never become and alcoholic just for the fact that my ex best friends dad died form drinking himself to death. But it would be nice just to let loose and meet some new people even if it was only for a couple of hours. Although I do kinda have an addictive personality and so maybe not a good idea.

 

[uncle]

I personally did not even know I had SA until I stopped drinking. At first I started drinking with friends on the weekends then it once in a while during the week, everything was great.....until

Drugs came into the picture. My friends and I trusted each other. Later on things changed when I noticed at times I would come back from the bathroom and see less drugs there and know someone was stealing.......then


I began to drink and do drugs by myself. I used to drink my self to sleep and wake up to a drink and some cocaine. This lasted for six years.....before

I was caught by my Dad with the drugs. He had no idea and was heartbroken. I had made a few attemps on my own to quit but had no success. That was Feb 1st of 2001. By the time I finally quit for good it was July 30Th, 2002. But I'm happy to say, that I have not done a drug or had a drink since that day. The first few years were hard and now I only get the urge once in a blue moon......Amazingly

I have no liver or physical health problems because of it. Although I cringe thinking back to all the foolish things I said and done under the influence. Not to mention all the money I blew...........Just yesterday

I had a conversation with my brother in law who is an alcoholic who has a 14 year old son (My nephew) who is just getting into weed and drinking. He's been into gangster rap for years now. Anyway they had a blow out at the house and my sister asked me to come over. I spoke to my nephew and asked him if he hates us and he said no he does not, but he does hate his father. I asked him why and he said because he broke his promisis to me. I relayed the conversation I had with him to my brother in law. So we sat down and talked and he came clean about how serious his drinking problem had gotten. It was far worse then I imagined. He said something to me that I'll never forget as long as I live.....He said

"My biggest regret is that they (his kids) will never the person I once was".

He knows that his kids will remember him as a drunk if he does not stop drinking and turn his life around. And the truth is that he was one of the best people you could hope to know before he became an alcoholic......And now

He claims he is going to quit for good and we have decided that if he does not live up to his words we will have an intervention on August 1ST.

He is in my prayers.

 

[mikebird]

I was a binger for the majority of my active life. Not sure if that can mean alcoholic - it's an undefined term, I think. I know a lot of people (street corner people) who are in that state, and I haven't been like that, even back in the days, but having lost my driving license for a total of 5.5 years has really wrecked my career - excuses people use about 'you can always use a train or bus' are NOT valid. I relish my driving today.

A closest friend, 10 years senior to me, was an icon of confident, friend-making-person, who needed rehab to get over his beers and cocaine problems, and he now has a thriving estate agency, which he had before then. He made me decide to check out an AA group, to see if I was having problems, but I've never been anything like that, and I'm glad. I've enjoyed a lot of things, and even waking up with a bad hangover is never quite enough to stop you doing it again, for 10 years. I've reigned myself in, and I'm healthy, and don't spend $£$£€ on it. It was confidence and laughs that I did benefit from.

 

[theslowesthand]

I was & still are "semi-alcoholic" - i can go without alcohol for even months, but without regular binges, generally my well-being generally goes to cr*p, probably as it is my primary emotional outlet. And even when "blind drunk" i still had most of my "shyness" intact, so it barely helped at all socially wise (in fact it made things worse, as i said/did "stupid" things)

 

[anxiousnut]

Yes, I definitely have a problem with alcohol. The last few weeks I've really been trying to reduce my drinking and have been better, only drinking once a week (but I still binge and drink a large bottle of wine at least). But for a long time before that I was binging about three nights a week. In college, I would drink about a half bottle every day. I know, horrible. So I've gotten better recently (knock on wood)...but I'd like to cut it out altogether. My problem is that when I start drinking I cannot stop. I keep going for 6, 7, 8 hours. It's like I can't get drunk enough. And I like to drink alone, it takes me to a world of my own. It really scares me because I know so many alcoholics in my family, and I know I have a VERY addictive personality. I don't want it to get worse so I have to nip it in the bud now. It's so hard, though.

 

[nothingtofear]

Yes, I definitely have a problem with alcohol. The last few weeks I've really been trying to reduce my drinking and have been better, only drinking once a week (but I still binge and drink a large bottle of wine at least). But for a long time before that I was binging about three nights a week. In college, I would drink about a half bottle every day. I know, horrible. So I've gotten better recently (knock on wood)...but I'd like to cut it out altogether. My problem is that when I start drinking I cannot stop. I keep going for 6, 7, 8 hours. It's like I can't get drunk enough. And I like to drink alone, it takes me to a world of my own. It really scares me because I know so many alcoholics in my family, and I know I have a VERY addictive personality. I don't want it to get worse so I have to nip it in the bud now. It's so hard, though.

I'm the exact same way when I drink. I can't drink in moderation at all. A buzz seems pointless, I want to get DRUNK but not too drunk... but when I'm drunk, I want to get more drunk and the more wasted I get the more I'm driven to drink more and the less I care why I shouldn't - so getting a little drunk almost inevitably leads to my going way overboard, every time. Luckily, after about half a year of drinking all my spending money (as cost effectively as I could) without even realizing that's what I was doing until the later days, I was able to stop and without much trouble too. I consider myself very fortunate, having seen how hard it can be for other people. I'm glad it didn't get any worse than it did. Now that I realize how little self control I've got (guess I've got a very addictive personality) I think I'm better off safe than sorry so I'm abstaining 100%

 

[TheSanctuarian]

I love a bit of the booze

Im a flirty drunk, the more I have the more I want to kiss people. the morning after is a very interesting time to realise your sexuality

 

[Quiet Angel]

I'm an alcoholic and I don't feel completely comfortable with other people when drunk. It mostly helps me loosen up around others but there's a small part of me that's self-concious. I tend to humilate myself when I drink too much though. I regret a lot of things I say, especially when I drunk text. For example: "I hope you and your new date have a 'fun' night, wink wink". Or I'll sned weird messages like "Woohoo!" or "Love!" or some incomplete messages like "This night is". Most of the time I'll misspell the words in my messages. In response I'll get question marks or "Are you ok?" As sociable as I can be when drinking, I usually prefer to drink alone. I plan to quit drinking altogether someday.

 

[lyricalliaisons]

I know two people online who have SA and are alcoholics. I also know one other person who started drinking because of his SA. I wouldn't call him an alcoholic, but I do know that a lot of people turn to alcohol and drugs when they have mental issues, so it doesn't surprise me that a lot of people with SA are alcoholics. As for myself, I've only had five alcoholic beverages in my life. I have enough problems & I don't need to add alcoholism into the mix, so I stay away from it.

 

[SM1010]

I LOVE the way alcohol makes me feel. I just don't care what anyone thinks when I'm drunk, it's amazing.

Ironically I rarely drink though. I guess I'm too worried about DUIs and other incredibly dumb things people do when they're wasted. Which is good I guess.