am I the only one who....

[jcwoolfolk]

...feels like committing suicide because of SA issues? Do you feel left out of your friends that if they don't invite you out that suicide is the only option?

I feel like that a lot. I feel like nobody wants me and that I would be better off alone or not even here.

 

[sleepless]

You feel that way because no one does.

 

[fuzzylogic]

I don't feel like killing myself. I would feel like killing them when I felt rejected. Anyway I discovered that being dependent on others to feel good was a bad investment for me and gave it up. But now I no longer see unhappiness or depression as a "bad" state of mind.

 

[zav943]

I have contemplated suicide lots of times, sometimes several days in a row...not seriously though.
I would then think, if I went ahead and did it, will anyone care? Will anyone, other than my parents, shed a tear for me? That just makes it worse...

Thankfully, it's been a while since I was plagued with these thoughts, but they're there...in my head, and they can come back any time.

 

[sevenroses]

Sorry to hear that your feeling sad bro. I know we all tend to feel down at times but if you need a friend to talk to I'm here.

 

[Waybuloo]

I have been suicidal everyday for a long time, to the point where if something doesn't go my way or I have an obstacle that is too hard to bear I feel suicidal. I have come close to it many times but I have not been brave enough so far. I would love for some divine intervention like choking on a bean or get hit by a car for it to take the responsibility out of my own hands.

I do feel that I might be missed if I go but they don't really need me, I am more a leech on their resources by living physically and emotionally, that they would be better off without me.

 

[SilverFire]

I've felt like that, yeah. I think part of SA is being supersensitive (not in a bad way); it's like what others feel as a pinprick we feel as a nuclear blast. But yeah I hate feeling excluded and I used to entertain suicide as an escape hatch or even as revenge, but ya know, that's just giving those that hurt you the final victory, and if anyone did care, that'd just hurt them.

 

[Richey]

to be hoenst the only time i would consider ending it is if i was diagnosed with some horrible disease becuase i dont want to spend my last days in a hospital bed with people consoling me as i fade out, sod that.

when it comes to SA and self esteem etc, at least i know i can overcome the problem and work on becoming healthy again. but yeh i don't have erratic reactions too depression etc. i know that some people have erratic urges to cut themselves or to hang themselves because they have this extreme bi-polar reaction with their moods that the anger isnde makes them want to harm themselves. i can control that really well and i can avoid getting that far which is a good thing.

 

[IamThisOne]

I feel the same way. Everyday I think about suicide. When I think about my "problems" I get this feeling when suicide comes into my mind. The feeling is like almost comforting, like when one figures out a math problem.

 

[rattybadger]

When I went to school I was suicidal. Now that I'm home schooled those really negative feelings have been numbed to a point where I can manage to trick people into thinking that I'm emotionally stable.

Ugh. But with all that rejection I received at school I spent most of my school lunch periods locked in a bathroom stall, thinking about whether or not I should drown myself in the toilet. Eww.

Glad that stage in my life is over with.

 

[agoraphobickatie]

i don't know how serious my suicidal thoughts are.. most of the time, i'll just think "i'll never be able to live normally, i'll never be happy, i'd rather not be here" ..i don't have any social anxiety problems, i just have agoraphobia issues and anxiety when being in public.. it really sucks because when i'm feeling down, i'll think about all of the things i might never get to do.. i really want to go to school, find someone, have a job, be happy, do something i love, but i feel like because of the agoraphobia i'll never get there..... i just kind of have to make myself snap out of it and have some hope. i know that thinking negatively only breeds negative outcome, so i just try to keep my head up.. i dream of better things in my future and have some hope and faith that i can make them happen.. that's how i've come this far, guess i can't just give up from where i'm standing...

 

[lunaticbinge]

I feel like doing it all of the time. If someone were to burst into my room and point a mag in my face i wouldn't flinch, just calmly tell him to make it quick. I think my depression stems from my SA for the most part and thoughts of never being able to overcome it really make it all seem hopeless.

 

[fitftw]

I feel like doing it all of the time. If someone were to burst into my room and point a mag in my face i wouldn't flinch, just calmly tell him to make it quick. I think my depression stems from my SA for the most part and thoughts of never being able to overcome it really make it all seem hopeless.

This just may be your path through life, and a Buddhist would teach you a lesson on accepting your fate and making the best of it because that is all we can do. Be the best we can be. In the US Army. lol. Nah but really just be you. I've said I wouldn't flinch if a gunman had me in his sights, but in reality I knew I'd probably **** bricks because I can visualize one right now coming through my door pointing a shotgun at me. I literally would **** and be speechless until he just pulled the trigger.