10 things you shouldn't say to someone with social anxiety!

[Srijita52]

''Everyone says what a big loser you are!" (well yeah, I know they do. Stop reminding it to me)

 

[tovoxy]

"why are u so quiet" - the most annoying one
"look guys, she can actually talk!!" - with this sarcastic tone
"why are you so small?" - i am very small, but this question is really dumb
"i'm not gonna sit next to her" - pisses me off all the time

i try to stay invisible, so people wont be saying stupid stuff like these and won't notice me at all, coz this is really annoying

 

[razzle dazzle rose]

Well, that sounds ridiculously awful! I'm thinking your classmates had as much trouble as you finding compliments for each other, so "you're quiet" and "you're shy" were the best they could come up with.

Still, I'm so glad I never had to do that in school!

It was. It was embarrassing almost. I think I may still have that sheet too, with all its lackluster compliments. I did receive some nice compliments too. But it just sucks that I have always been known for just being quiet and shy. No wonder none of my classmates have "found" me on fb. They don't remember who I am.

 

[Agent_Violet]

"This is why everybody hates you u stupid b*tch, its because you don't know how to fvcking act, look at that stupid face of yours." - that was my mom a few minutes ago. I'm pretty much used to it by now, i hear that from her all the time.

This makes me want to cry.. Then it makes me want to do evil things to your mother. You are NOT stupid. You are NOT a b*tch. And you certainly don't have a stupid face.
Now on the othe hand, you ARE clever. You ARE funny. You ARE kind. And just all around one cool chick. Screw mom. She's just saying all the things to you that she feels about herself. She's the stupid b*tch for talking about her child like that.

 

[razzle dazzle rose]

"This is why everybody hates you u stupid b*tch, its because you don't know how to fvcking act, look at that stupid face of yours." - that was my mom a few minutes ago. I'm pretty much used to it by now, i hear that from her all the time.

Ouch. That is really mean! And it is abusive Sorry you have to go through that *hugs*

 

[MikeyC]

"I swear talking to YOU is like talking to a wall!" - mother
"Your voice is so soft, it's no wonder that you don't have any friends" - father

Sad to say, the only two people who actually matter in my life are the people who have hurt me the most. They say alot of variations of the above quotes, since they get angry alot.

Because your parents matter so much to you, any negative thing they say is going to sting a lot more. If someone random said that, you'd know they're just being stupid for no reason.

Still, that doesn't change the fact that what they said was very hurtful, especially your dad's comment.

"This is why everybody hates you u stupid b*tch, its because you don't know how to fvcking act, look at that stupid face of yours." - that was my mom a few minutes ago. I'm pretty much used to it by now, i hear that from her all the time.

Yeah, you shouldn't have to put up with that....

It was. It was embarrassing almost. I think I may still have that sheet too, with all its lackluster compliments. I did receive some nice compliments too. But it just sucks that I have always been known for just being quiet and shy. No wonder none of my classmates have "found" me on fb. They don't remember who I am.

If you've kept the sheet, there must've been some good ones on there. I can't imagine if they were all variations of "you're quiet" and "you're shy" you would keep it!

I'm glad a lot of school friends haven't found me on Facebook. I hated most of them. Maybe it's the same situation for you? ::

 

[YellowBird]

'she's shy' God,ever since I was child it always made me feel like I don't have a personality,like I'm weak or stupid or something and everyone is so cool and superior...grrrr

 

[razzle dazzle rose]

If you've kept the sheet, there must've been some good ones on there. I can't imagine if they were all variations of "you're quiet" and "you're shy" you would keep it!

Well, I can be a bit of a hoarder, lol. A sentimental hoarder. I had kept all my notes and stuff. I have thrown most of it now, and I remember seeing that sheet, I just don't remember what I did with it: did I throw it away? It made me mad all over again. I hope I did throw it away so I don't have to see it a third time

I'm glad a lot of school friends haven't found me on Facebook. I hated most of them. Maybe it's the same situation for you? ::

Haha...true. But in a way it still makes me feel left out. Like I am still invisible! Ahhh. You are right of course. I really don't care about them anymore.

 

[MikeyC]

Well, I can be a bit of a hoarder, lol. A sentimental hoarder. I had kept all my notes and stuff. I have thrown most of it now, and I remember seeing that sheet, I just don't remember what I did with it: did I throw it away? It made me mad all over again. I hope I did throw it away so I don't have to see it a third time

Well, keeping sentimental things is a little different. I have a card from old workmates with all nice messages in it when I left. Turns out it didn't matter because I returned 4 months later. ::

I hope you threw it away, too. No need to continue revisiting the awfulness time and time again if it's just going to make you upset!

Haha...true. But in a way it still makes me feel left out. Like I am still invisible! Ahhh. You are right of course. I really don't care about them anymore.

I can understand what you mean about being left out. If you wanted to be in that clique and you're not, then you'd definitely feel a sense of isolation. It's not the same for me, though.

 

[JJB]

'Why don't you go and mingle' and 'get a life' use to drive me mad.

Agree with Kiwong. It's not what is said that's the problem, it's the fact that you care what is said that is the issue.

 

[Dead_on_Arrival]

Stop being a bum and get a job..........

 

[coyote]

"what do you have on your face?"

 

[RedMonkey]

"you are to late to learn anything" My ex boss said that to me.

 

[Broken Beat & Scarred]

You're awkward or stop being awkward. I swear this tears a hole right in my heart when I hear this said to me. Its pretty ironic that the person who always says this to me makes me feel that way because of the way she is.

What a world.

 

[R3K]

"He's finally starting to come out of his shell."

MMM... thanks for reminding me i was in a shell to begin with and letting me know that you and your clique have already been speculating on my shyness for such a long time (apparently)

 

[Dead_on_Arrival]

Your not going out dressed like that, you'll embarass me. (last night)

That necklace makes you look like a girl. (this morning)

 

[Agent_Violet]

Your not going out dressed like that, you'll embarass me. (last night)

That necklace makes you look like a girl. (this morning)

that's not just something you don't say to someone with social anxiety...that's something you just don't say to the person you claim to love. Sorry. just calling it like i see it.

there are ways to be constructively critical of your spouse...and the above examples are NOT it.

someone should read the emotional abuse handbook for marriages.

 

[Dead_on_Arrival]

that's not just something you don't say to someone with social anxiety...that's something you just don't say to the person you claim to love. Sorry. just calling it like i see it.

there are ways to be constructively critical of your spouse...and the above examples are NOT it.

someone should read the emotional abuse handbook for marriages.

You got it spot on there hun. The library are all out though.

 

[Little Miss Muffet]

You're awkward or stop being awkward. I swear this tears a hole right in my heart when I hear this said to me. Its pretty ironic that the person who always says this to me makes me feel that way because of the way she is.

What a world.

Thats rediculous telling someone to stop being awkward. Like we can controll it - who would choose to be awkward

 

[Dead_on_Arrival]

Sometimes saying nothing at all is the worst thing. Lock me out in the cold why dont you

This is one thing that realy gets to me too. I hate silence in the room especially awkward silence. I feel like I should speak but fear the ridicule if I do and then that turns to thoughts of 'is it me', or 'what have I done/not done, said/not said'.