So I tried to make new friends at work but it didn't go to plan. I came close but no cigar. And if I contact them anymore I just look too desperate. I probably already come off as that as it stands. The only other option is to join some club or sporting institution i guess?
If you can't make friends at work how the hell are you suppose to make new friends?
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Richey
Well-known member
I have found that people tend to have a lot of ego, they are not really worried about you or me, they instead gravitate superficially to the loudest or people who are very good at banter, semi offensive banter, whatever it is.
a lot of social circles that develop tend to be harsh and difficult.
Of course it does happen when you meet a really nice group.
This can also depend on the age group and types of personalities you are spending time around.
Again its not easy. Its very hard. Sometimes people just don't fit in very well. But then sometimes they do.
The key is to realise that maybe the personalities are a mismatch and maybe the group is just not ideal or difficult for a lot of people to deal with. The key is to realise that and get on and not take it personally, that's the hard part.
a lot of social circles that develop tend to be harsh and difficult.
Of course it does happen when you meet a really nice group.
This can also depend on the age group and types of personalities you are spending time around.
Again its not easy. Its very hard. Sometimes people just don't fit in very well. But then sometimes they do.
The key is to realise that maybe the personalities are a mismatch and maybe the group is just not ideal or difficult for a lot of people to deal with. The key is to realise that and get on and not take it personally, that's the hard part.
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I think your right about gravitating to loud personalities, well that's a no brainer i guess. I also find though that promptness is important. If you wait too long to organize anything it's almost too late. There's a one or two month sweet spot for befriending people after you first meet them. If you go beyond this period it makes it more difficult. I also prefer gatherings over outings which not everyone prefers as well...
Pacific_Loner
Pirate from the North Pole
Since it's a lot easier to make new friends through shared activities, you have way better chances to make friends by joining a club or a sporting institution than by trying to see your work colleagues outside of work. I mean what would you do with them anyway, hang out? Do you really want to do that?
Ithior
Well-known member
There's meetup.com for example.
But if you're from a country where these websites don't have large communities, it's useless. The portuguese communities in these websites are very small, and if I take into account what I like doing, then that number drops to 0.
If you're in the UK, US, Canada, etc then go ahead.
MikeyC
Well-known member
Who did you support? I'm a fan of the Dragons. I think it's a good idea, though.
Kiwong
Well-known member
Haha, the Cronulla Sharks, the local derby, mortal enemies!
MikeyC
Well-known member
A Sharks supporter? *eyes Kiwong suspiciously*
MikeyC
Well-known member
I'm too young to remember them fondly, but they were a hopeless team. The merger is the best thing that they could've hoped for to keep the Wollongong contingent alive.
Anyway, this is getting a little away from the thread...! I'm sure the OP has no idea what we're on about. :
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dottie
Well-known member
Well said!
Earthcircle
Well-known member
If it's this hard just to make friends, how is one supposed to form a relationship? People do it all the time, but I don't know how they do it.