emre43
Well-known member
It's a case of having no choice. So what if a girl calls me ugly? (or a man for that matter)...I think the answer is pretty obvious don't you think!?...Put it this way i'm not going to be doing cartwheels am i!?
Is it pretty obvious? Well if it is, it certainly isn't to me. I've been told that I'm ugly before by lots of people, so what? I brush it off, I wouldn't want to be with somebody with that kind of character anyway. You've got to brush these things off and get over it. It is unattractive in itself to drag your knuckles behind you and feel sorry for yourself.
Nobody said anything about doing cartwheels, it wouldn't make me feel happy either but everybody is called ugly at some point in their life. The difference is they don't let it get to them. They brush it off and get on with things and that's the right way to do things. Listen, people here are trying to help you. You can believe what you want to believe but the way you are thinking now isn't helping you, it's your choice, CBT is a proven success story.
If anybody feels the need to call you ugly, it is them with the problem, bot you. Here is what Alfred Adler said of the superiority complex:
"We should not be astonished if in the cases where we see an inferiority [feeling] complex we find a superiority complex more or less hidden. On the other hand, if we inquire into a superiority complex and study its continuity, we can always find a more or less hidden inferiority [feeling] complex.
If a person is a show-off it is only because he feels inferior, because he does not feel strong enough to compete with others on the useful side of life. That is why he stays on the useless side. He is not in harmony with society. It seems to be a trait of human nature that when individuals - both children and adults - feel weak, they want to solve the problems of life in such a way as to obtain personal superiority without any admixture of social interest. A superiority complex is a second phase. It is a compensation for the inferiority [feeling] complex.
The superiority complex is one of the ways which a person with an inferiority [feeling] complex may use as a method of escape from his difficulties. He assumes that he is superior when he is not, and this false success compensates him for the state of inferiority which he cannot bear. The normal person does not have a superiority complex, he does not even have a sense of superiority. He has the striving to be superior in the sense that we all have ambition to be successful; but so long as this striving is expressed in work it does not lead to false valuations, which are at the root of mental disease".
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