Saying 'Excuse me' to a stranger when you want to go past- I can't do it!

[Toomuchfear]

Sometimes having social anxiety really sucks!

When I'm outside or in a shop, and I want to get past someone, I can't say "Excuse me." For some reason it comes out as a whisper so they can't even hear it. The busier it is, the quieter my words are. Instead I just stand there waiting for them to notice me or end up going a different way- and I come across as rude. At home I'm fine, but when in public my voice just... goes!

This is getting ridiculous, I hate that even the simplest things in life are near impossible!::

 

[Phoenixx]

I do the exact same thing from time to time. In the store, sometimes I'll just sit there like an idiot waiting to get by. Sometimes I'll even pretend I'm looking at something, when I'm actually waiting for someone to go another way so I can go by. Because saying "excuse me" is much too hard.

 

[***deleted***]

Sometimes I give people A tiny nudge so I can get through. Usually I only do this when I've said excuse me and It didn't get heard. Most people realize they were in the way and move. The best part is people usually act like they did something wrong, so they don't get mad at me for slightly nudging them.

 

[Toomuchfear]

Nudging is scarier than speaking for me. Maybe i should get a battering ram.

The only way I get past these social quirks as by taking small steps. E.g asking an assistant where something in the shop is even if I know it already

 

[Lonelykitsune]

I just say 'sorry' when I bump into someone or if their in my way. I find the 's' sound easier to say and the sounds carries better.

I say it about a million times a day when walking about over-crowded school corridors

 

[N1LOY]

Oh dude.. I got the same problem.
I need help and these parents are not really supportive.

 

[darkrider]

I know the feeling.

 

[Deus_Ex_Lemur]

I do the exact same thing from time to time. In the store, sometimes I'll just sit there like an idiot waiting to get by. Sometimes I'll even pretend I'm looking at something, when I'm actually waiting for someone to go another way so I can go by. Because saying "excuse me" is much too hard.

I've done this... still do, but learned to move past usually. If I dont do it immediately I tend not to. I dont just wait I pretend I am still looking at something or chart another path.

But now I just go pass, and say excuse me, sometimes sorry after. Probably come off rude but whatever =)

 

[Aussie_Lad]

suggestion: tap the person lightly on the upper arm or shoulder and then say "excuse me". This is an almost guaranteed way to get someone out of the way.

 

[Surrogate]

Nudging is scarier than speaking for me. Maybe i should get a battering ram.

The only way I get past these social quirks as by taking small steps. E.g asking an assistant where something in the shop is even if I know it already

Hahaha battering ram. I'd say just charge through them like you're taking down a fortress.

If you don't feel too comfortable saying excuse me, you can signal via other methods, like physical contact, or even something really funny like "a-hem".

Or, just walk past them, even if it means coming into contact with them, and then say sorry like you did it by accident.

Of course, this is probably adapting the wrong mindset, but hey, you can't do much with SA anyways.

 

[Tiercel]

suggestion: tap the person lightly on the upper arm or shoulder and then say "excuse me". This is an almost guaranteed way to get someone out of the way.

Definitely a good suggestion! I've never known a person to get frightening after this subtle cue to move his/her butt.

Unfortunately I either walk around, wait for the person to move, or sneak by with a drawn out 'scuuuuse me, which slowly descends in pitch until it jumps up at the end.

 

[Kiwong]

I say "excuse me mate." Saying excuse me doesn't bother me.

It only bothers if they want to continue to chat, that is when people notice my anxiety.

 

[BlueDays]

I don't have a problem saying "Excuse me" when I need to get passed someone as I am always in a hurry to get home as soon as possible.

I have a problem with saying "sorry" when people bump into or collide with me.
Even when it is their fault.
It's like my mind automatically thinks I am a lesser being then other people, so I am the one who must say sorry!