Have you improved your life significantly? In what ways has your Social Phobia gotten better? List your most important recent triumphs and explain how these have changed your life!
Have you improved lately?
- Thread starter Phobologist
- Start date
AimeeSP
Well-known member
I went on two trains the other week into a town i had never ever been before to help a friend babysit, got lost for two hours while i was looking after my nephew, then i found my way back. First time i've used public transport in a year and a half. I was very happy that day despite having to sit right next to the stinking toilets incase i puked - which to be honest actually made me want to puke, public loos are disgusting.
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I went on two trains the other week into a town i had never ever been before to help a friend babysit, got lost for two hours while i was looking after my nephew, then i found my way back. First time i've used public transport in a year and a half. I was very happy that day despite having to sit right next to the stinking toilets incase i puked.
That's fantastic! I must feel great not to be crippled by fear of public transporation. Good for you.
NickyNacker
Well-known member
No. If anything, I've gotten worse. :/
twilightwolf-626
Member
Me too, I haven't improved at all.:
:
Danfalc
Banned
Not significantly,but I have taken baby steps forward and improved on some things and I feel better for it in myself.I am eating better,sleeping better and doing my push ups and working out.
I'm really trying to take care of my body more physicaly and appreance wise,I feel more confident for it and a bit more posative.Im also working so hard on my finances,I life to feel in controll of my bills as my flat means a lot to me and my security in life.
Ive pushed myself to go out to a mates a few times and mingled a bit,it was horrible the first few times but its getting better and I am starting to feel more comfy,also I got back with my GF,I was really honest with her which was hard but it worked out in the end
I'm really trying to take care of my body more physicaly and appreance wise,I feel more confident for it and a bit more posative.Im also working so hard on my finances,I life to feel in controll of my bills as my flat means a lot to me and my security in life.
Ive pushed myself to go out to a mates a few times and mingled a bit,it was horrible the first few times but its getting better and I am starting to feel more comfy,also I got back with my GF,I was really honest with her which was hard but it worked out in the end
Nope. I'm as paranoid as ever.
Lorraine Manca
Well-known member
I've gotten worlds better at hiding the anxiety and acting normal, but i feel worse as time goes on.
this_portrait
Well-known member
Yes and no.
Yes:: Dating this new guy is practically like exposure therapy for me, and I'm doing a decent job of making myself out to be "normal", for the most part.
No:: I still don't have hardly any friends, and I still feel rather isolated. =(
Yes:: Dating this new guy is practically like exposure therapy for me, and I'm doing a decent job of making myself out to be "normal", for the most part.
No:: I still don't have hardly any friends, and I still feel rather isolated. =(
agoraphobickatie
Well-known member
i'm hesitant to say i'm getting better, but i've had many many successes lately as far as getting out of the house, even though sometimes i feel worse and it's harder than others, it's still a success....
i've been going to some random place on my list of 'places i DON'T want to go' every day and it's been pretty draining, but i've done it and i'm still getting out... i've actually found that lately, i'm getting ready to go somewhere and i think to myself "hm.. this is weird.. why am i not freaking out right now?", because the time before i ever went anywhere used to be the worst, but i guess now that i'm making trips daily, i'm getting it into my head that "okay.. you're just going to have to do it, you know you're fine.. just do it" instead of thinking about it tons and tons, i've developed the "fukk it, just do it" thing.... way to go, nike! haha
anyway, i have a long way to go, but the exposure therapy has and i'm pretty sure is the best way for me to overcome my agoraphobia.. so wish me luck and best wishes to everyone doing well, it's nice to read some success stories!
i've been going to some random place on my list of 'places i DON'T want to go' every day and it's been pretty draining, but i've done it and i'm still getting out... i've actually found that lately, i'm getting ready to go somewhere and i think to myself "hm.. this is weird.. why am i not freaking out right now?", because the time before i ever went anywhere used to be the worst, but i guess now that i'm making trips daily, i'm getting it into my head that "okay.. you're just going to have to do it, you know you're fine.. just do it" instead of thinking about it tons and tons, i've developed the "fukk it, just do it" thing.... way to go, nike! haha
anyway, i have a long way to go, but the exposure therapy has and i'm pretty sure is the best way for me to overcome my agoraphobia.. so wish me luck
and best wishes to everyone doing well, it's nice to read some success stories!
Scrabbl
1
also I got back with my GF,I was really honest with her which was hard but it worked out in the end
that's awesome =))))))
it's nice to hear everybody's successes, however small they may seem
Not significantly,but I have taken baby steps forward and improved on some things and I feel better for it in myself.I am eating better,sleeping better and doing my push ups and working out.
I'm really trying to take care of my body more physicaly and appreance wise,I feel more confident for it and a bit more posative.Im also working so hard on my finances,I life to feel in controll of my bills as my flat means a lot to me and my security in life.
Ive pushed myself to go out to a mates a few times and mingled a bit,it was horrible the first few times but its getting better and I am starting to feel more comfy,also I got back with my GF,I was really honest with her which was hard but it worked out in the end
Wonderful. Do you think you can post successful treatments on my CBT thread? It sounds like you have some knowledge that would benefit the rest of us.
My recent improvement:
1. My depression has been reduced to sporadic attacks every few days. It's usualy mild to moderate with occasional severe bouts every other week or so. "Suicidaly severe" episodes are lasting only a few hours, down from half-a day to a full day, and occur infrequently.
2. Im only experiencing half as many highly anxious thoughts of a general nature.
3. My anxiety around meeting new people is now mild to moderate. I am not afraid to tell them about most of my "defects" and I do not need to act "normal". I am committed to being myself.
4. My anxiety over criticism in general is now moderate. I have automatic self-affirming thoughts (its not my fault, its not a personal flaw, its not true, etc) which contest my immediate imagined criticisms, resulting in moderate to intense anxiety which lasts for only a few moments.
5. Interpersonal conflict no longer results in extreme rage and a collapse of self-esteem, although my anxiety is triggered and I become irritated or angry.
6. My intrusive thought disorder is now milder and more manageable.
7. I am now about 80% positive that my alleged "defects" are not shameful, personal faults.
8. My phobia of objectifying women is 95% gone.
9. My phobia of getting turned on by sexual imagery or experiences in public (especialy if its physicaly obvious) is entirely gone.
10. My persistent tardiness is completely resolved.
11. My self-esteem is three or four times higher than a month ago.
12. I am much less likely to think in terms of Black and White, fortune telling, or emotionaly.
13. My ability to be vulnerable in front of other people is now much greater.
14. My assertiveness is greatly improved.
15. I am around 90% sure that my five romantic "paranoias" are completely insane.
16. I am not as convinced as before that people are out to get me, when they disagree on a crucial topic.
17. Lasting feelings of happiness are intermittent, occuring every few hours to every other day.
18. I now have a regular activity (Kung Fu) which I pursue three times a week. I am also planning on singing in a choir (like musicals etc, not church) and weight-lifting.
19. I can now have sex with girls without trying to "maneuver" them, pretending to be "cool", or worrying about whether they like me. I can hold down a conversation on the basis of enjoying women's company, and I can go out with them without requiring sexual favours at the end of the night. I've recently had a short fling with a girl that didn't end the same night we had sex (which is unsual for me). It remains to be seen if I can make a relationship.
20. I started looking for a job. Im currently on a regiment of sending out two resumes a day.
21. I no longer have very much shame over my violent fetish, and I don't feel I need to keep it a secret from most people who know me.
1. My depression has been reduced to sporadic attacks every few days. It's usualy mild to moderate with occasional severe bouts every other week or so. "Suicidaly severe" episodes are lasting only a few hours, down from half-a day to a full day, and occur infrequently.
2. Im only experiencing half as many highly anxious thoughts of a general nature.
3. My anxiety around meeting new people is now mild to moderate. I am not afraid to tell them about most of my "defects" and I do not need to act "normal". I am committed to being myself.
4. My anxiety over criticism in general is now moderate. I have automatic self-affirming thoughts (its not my fault, its not a personal flaw, its not true, etc) which contest my immediate imagined criticisms, resulting in moderate to intense anxiety which lasts for only a few moments.
5. Interpersonal conflict no longer results in extreme rage and a collapse of self-esteem, although my anxiety is triggered and I become irritated or angry.
6. My intrusive thought disorder is now milder and more manageable.
7. I am now about 80% positive that my alleged "defects" are not shameful, personal faults.
8. My phobia of objectifying women is 95% gone.
9. My phobia of getting turned on by sexual imagery or experiences in public (especialy if its physicaly obvious) is entirely gone.
10. My persistent tardiness is completely resolved.
11. My self-esteem is three or four times higher than a month ago.
12. I am much less likely to think in terms of Black and White, fortune telling, or emotionaly.
13. My ability to be vulnerable in front of other people is now much greater.
14. My assertiveness is greatly improved.
15. I am around 90% sure that my five romantic "paranoias" are completely insane.
16. I am not as convinced as before that people are out to get me, when they disagree on a crucial topic.
17. Lasting feelings of happiness are intermittent, occuring every few hours to every other day.
18. I now have a regular activity (Kung Fu) which I pursue three times a week. I am also planning on singing in a choir (like musicals etc, not church) and weight-lifting.
19. I can now have sex with girls without trying to "maneuver" them, pretending to be "cool", or worrying about whether they like me. I can hold down a conversation on the basis of enjoying women's company, and I can go out with them without requiring sexual favours at the end of the night. I've recently had a short fling with a girl that didn't end the same night we had sex (which is unsual for me). It remains to be seen if I can make a relationship.
20. I started looking for a job. Im currently on a regiment of sending out two resumes a day.
21. I no longer have very much shame over my violent fetish, and I don't feel I need to keep it a secret from most people who know me.
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Well as you (the postor) know, I asked out a guy yesterday and he said yes. I thought I was going to die and was sweating like a monkey but I did it and now I think I'm going to try and enter some type of counseling. I haven't wanted to in the past, I was to scared but I have to start college soon and I don't want this as such a big hinderance as its been. Although it seems my anxiety creeps up more than ever in any type of situation including with my family or even on this forum I'm trying to deal better than I usually do. It's going decent.
meatcake
1
phobo - wow, that's awesome.
krista - that's awesome also.
i've been trying to own my emotions instead of always trying to distance myself from them and disown them. especially anger. when i am able to do that, it's like i get a sense of identity, and feel more able to deal with the world. i think this is what has contributed a lot to my avoiding life - just feeling like a leaf being blown by the wind. or of always just being an object in other peoples eyes, instead of a subject.
it was like
disowning emotions -> lack of honest identity -> screwed up interactions -> SA -> avoidance, depression etc.
it's too early to say how much it'll actually end up helping. but i feel more optimistic. and it fits with stuff i read 20 years ago but was too scared to do anything about.
krista - that's awesome also.
i've been trying to own my emotions instead of always trying to distance myself from them and disown them. especially anger. when i am able to do that, it's like i get a sense of identity, and feel more able to deal with the world. i think this is what has contributed a lot to my avoiding life - just feeling like a leaf being blown by the wind. or of always just being an object in other peoples eyes, instead of a subject.
it was like
disowning emotions -> lack of honest identity -> screwed up interactions -> SA -> avoidance, depression etc.
it's too early to say how much it'll actually end up helping. but i feel more optimistic. and it fits with stuff i read 20 years ago but was too scared to do anything about.
hi meatcake and thanks!
I disagree with your owning emotions perspective however. If you want to talk about my take on SA just give me a pm.
I disagree with your owning emotions perspective however. If you want to talk about my take on SA just give me a pm.
