worring too much about finding a girl

M

man on the hill

Well-known member
Im not sure whats going on with me, but for the last several months I have been searching on alot of online dating sites and even made me an ad on craigslist under the personals section, trying to find me a girl. and like 2 months ago I did actually go on a "blind date" with this girl. I met her on datehookup.com i think, we messaged for about a week and then started texting a whole lot about everything for another week and decided to meet up. we both had to drive about an hour and meet in the middle. we just went to the movies and that was it. it was kinda awkward and we were both trying to be nice an stuff. but after that I think we both came to the same conclusion, she didnt try to text me and vice versa.

but I guess what Im trying to get at, it seems like the harder I try to look for someone the less luck I have. And it seems like thats all im worried about is trying to find a girl as fast as possible. but ive also had people tell me I shouldnt worry about it cause im still young (25) and most likely I will meet someone when I least expect it.
 
MikeyC

MikeyC

Well-known member
Don't sweat it, man. Keep going on dates and such, and you will find someone, but patience is key. There's no deadline to uphold.
 
MotherWolff

MotherWolff

Banned
man on the hill said:
Im not sure whats going on with me, but for the last several months I have been searching on alot of online dating sites and even made me an ad on craigslist under the personals section, trying to find me a girl. and like 2 months ago I did actually go on a "blind date" with this girl. I met her on datehookup.com i think, we messaged for about a week and then started texting a whole lot about everything for another week and decided to meet up. we both had to drive about an hour and meet in the middle. we just went to the movies and that was it. it was kinda awkward and we were both trying to be nice an stuff. but after that I think we both came to the same conclusion, she didnt try to text me and vice versa.

but I guess what Im trying to get at, it seems like the harder I try to look for someone the less luck I have. And it seems like thats all im worried about is trying to find a girl as fast as possible. but ive also had people tell me I shouldnt worry about it cause im still young (25) and most likely I will meet someone when I least expect it.
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I am going through the same thing. Except I am female and I'm looking for a guy. Hopefully you will find somebody even though it seems hopeless. Whatever you do, don't become desperate.

MikeyC said:
Don't sweat it, man. Keep going on dates and such, and you will find someone, but patience is key. There's no deadline to uphold.
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That's the spirit! :3
 
OceanMist

OceanMist

Well-known member
Yes, I am trying to find a woman too. It's frustrating when it doesn't work out over and over again like what has happened to me.

I've had some first dates that have been awkward like yours. Some people just don't connect.

I think you should keep trying because it does get a little easier once you start meeting more women in person. Hopefully we both can find a lady that works for us.

My problem is more of not being able to find many women at all that I'm not embarrassed to be around in the looks department. I'd say like 7 out of the 9 women I've met in the past year, I was embarrassed to be around them in public. It shouldn't be like that, you know? I need to find a woman that I at least feel normal with.
 
M

man on the hill

Well-known member
yea, that is sort of the problem I have. I dont know if I got my standards too high or what. I mean, dont get me wrong, I dont consider my self no prize catch lol, its not like I have girls flirting with me everywhere I go, its usually the opposite ::eek:: . but I mean, I am in good physical shape, about 5'7 and 145lbs, with a athletic/muscled type body. I mean, im sort of a small guy, and honestly id like to find a girl at least the same size as me, or a little smaller. but like, most of the girls that have messaged me or ive messaged, and even the one that I went on the blind date with, were sort of on the heavy side. I just think we would get along better out doing stuff (and in the bedroom ;) ) with two similar sized people.
 
A86

A86

Well-known member
dunno if this makes sense, but...

i wonder if because of our inherent compulsion to over analyse what other people think of us if we are being picky to satisfy what we think others would expect of us for partners rather than our own expectations?
 
Flanscho

Flanscho

Well-known member
I know that feeling. I met some awesome people via dating sates, and some of my nicest memories are connected to those people. Still, I think that the best way is to pick up some hobby, find people who do the same, and then meet. Then you have something in common already.

Recently, a friend of mine, after returning from a wedding, asked me whether I'd like to marry some day. It took me a moment of additional self control not to reply with a bitter laugh.

I think the best dating site I tried was okcupid.
 
A

Amitush123

Well-known member
Flanscho said:
I know that feeling. I met some awesome people via dating sates, and some of my nicest memories are connected to those people. Still, I think that the best way is to pick up some hobby, find people who do the same, and then meet. Then you have something in common already.

Recently, a friend of mine, after returning from a wedding, asked me whether I'd like to marry some day. It took me a moment of additional self control not to reply with a bitter laugh.

I think the best dating site I tried was okcupid.
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I can relate, I find it difficult to communicate with other people face to face, therefore sites like okcupid help people like me to meet and date..however, it is still quite limited
 
MotherWolff

MotherWolff

Banned
A86 said:
dunno if this makes sense, but...

i wonder if because of our inherent compulsion to over analyse what other people think of us if we are being picky to satisfy what we think others would expect of us for partners rather than our own expectations?
Click to expand...

Hmmmm. That's an awesome question!:D In a way, MotherWolff believes that we are pretty picky.....
 
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