Here's something to whet your appetites :
http://www.angelfire.com/ab6/polepino/Chapter05/Whystudymen.html
http://www.angelfire.com/ab6/polepino/Chapter05/Whystudymen.html
Women have it easy.
- Thread starter Anonymous
- Start date
Hey,
I am a very shy female, i get called hot from a lot of guys, yet i have no boyfriend, i'm not fat and yet i never get hit on by guys, i think it just depends on how bad the person has it. like someone who is really really shy has it worse then someone who is just a little shy. also, guys are supposed to make the first move, and even if your shy i'm sure you can't truthfully say that have never hit on a girl, but girls have to sit around and wait for the guy, but it is hard to ask a girl out especially with the chance of rejection. so i'd have to say it's equal, both have it pretty damn shitty :wink:.
Jess
(i hope i have not offended anyone, if i did sorry
, that's just how i feel)
I am a very shy female, i get called hot from a lot of guys, yet i have no boyfriend, i'm not fat and yet i never get hit on by guys, i think it just depends on how bad the person has it. like someone who is really really shy has it worse then someone who is just a little shy. also, guys are supposed to make the first move, and even if your shy i'm sure you can't truthfully say that have never hit on a girl, but girls have to sit around and wait for the guy, but it is hard to ask a girl out especially with the chance of rejection. so i'd have to say it's equal, both have it pretty damn shitty :wink:.
Jess
(i hope i have not offended anyone, if i did sorry
, that's just how i feel)
Anonymous
Well-known member
JeSs42790 said:Hey,
like someone who is really really shy has it worse then someone who is just a little shy. also, guys are supposed to make the first move, and even if your shy i'm sure you can't truthfully say that have never hit on a girl, but girls have to sit around and wait for the guy, but it is hard to ask a girl out especially with the chance of rejection. so i'd have to say it's equal, both have it pretty damn shitty :wink:.
Jess
(i hope i have not offended anyone, if i did sorry
guys are SUPPOSED to hit on girls first. Why can't we change the RULES so that the less shy person (or more assertive person) approaches the guy first. Also, when I was younger and better looking
I would occasionally, yet rarely be hit on by girls. I only had the nerve to approach one girl first. As far as risking rejection--- it seems that guys first have it hard having to work up the nerve..... and then not only do we risk rejection, but we also risk being ridiculed (subtley or outright) by the girl or even her friends. I think the risk passive rejection is much safer. Society sucks, we all should break the rules and everyone should be allowed to be assertive or passive depending upon their personality. But, hey, I guess I should stop whining because that will never change... most people are like sheep who follow the shepard.
Anonymous
Well-known member
Well...
Being shy has made dating doubly difficult for this chica I can tell you! Because of my shyness and being kinda socially akward thanks to Social Phobia, I don't even realise if I Am being hit on. Women are raised that men will make the move but, I never know I'm being hit on until later when a friend tells me. Quite frankly, I've never dated a guy that asked me out. I HAVE however liked a couple guys so much that I worked myself up and asked THEM out. Had a huge panic attack later but I got 'em. And I will tell you right now, they were ALL shy, introverted kind of guys. Women actually LIKE shy guys because it decreases your risk of public humiliation. Shy guys tend to think before they spout and aren't likely to hump the hostesses leg when their drunk. Unlike the "manly" creeps. Thank You.
Being shy has made dating doubly difficult for this chica I can tell you! Because of my shyness and being kinda socially akward thanks to Social Phobia, I don't even realise if I Am being hit on. Women are raised that men will make the move but, I never know I'm being hit on until later when a friend tells me. Quite frankly, I've never dated a guy that asked me out. I HAVE however liked a couple guys so much that I worked myself up and asked THEM out. Had a huge panic attack later but I got 'em. And I will tell you right now, they were ALL shy, introverted kind of guys. Women actually LIKE shy guys because it decreases your risk of public humiliation. Shy guys tend to think before they spout and aren't likely to hump the hostesses leg when their drunk. Unlike the "manly" creeps. Thank You.
Pessimisten
Member
Re: Well...
The very same has happened to me too on several occasions. Sometimes I realize I was being hit on the very next day, or much later when someone actually tell me.
It has happened that I just panic. Plain and simple. It was a girl who was quite forward and actually attractive. And well, I let the oportunnity pass by because I just froze. It was a few years ago, but everytime I visit that memory -mainly for the sake of mentally torturing myself- I really get angry at myself for being such a wuss.
Chica said:
The very same has happened to me too on several occasions. Sometimes I realize I was being hit on the very next day, or much later when someone actually tell me.
It has happened that I just panic. Plain and simple. It was a girl who was quite forward and actually attractive. And well, I let the oportunnity pass by because I just froze. It was a few years ago, but everytime I visit that memory -mainly for the sake of mentally torturing myself- I really get angry at myself for being such a wuss.
firelily
Member
From my experience, shy women don't have it easier. In my courses at university, girls make up about 85% of the numbers. To get noticed among all the extroverted, loud types is near impossible. When guys look at girls, the self-confident 'talk to anyone' types are always the most prominent. Shy gals take a bit more effort to get to know!
Expectations of men in society are generally higher. It's very true that it is harder for a man when it comes to severe isolation and disability to find any female interested.
While I don't agree with the expectations they are still there. It is much more eeasier for a female to seek help because of the more sympathy out there.
While I don't agree with the expectations they are still there. It is much more eeasier for a female to seek help because of the more sympathy out there.
Horatio
Well-known member
Re: Males and Females
When a socialphobic unnattractive male tries to hit on a girl, is that a suicide attempt?
Cause thats what it feels like
I dont want to say that females have it easier but I do think that socialphobic males have a much higher chance of living a solitary life than socialphobic females do... and contributors to our forum seem to represent that statistic. More females on here have partners than males do.
zelwood said:
When a socialphobic unnattractive male tries to hit on a girl, is that a suicide attempt?
Cause thats what it feels like
I dont want to say that females have it easier but I do think that socialphobic males have a much higher chance of living a solitary life than socialphobic females do... and contributors to our forum seem to represent that statistic. More females on here have partners than males do.
SomeGuy
Member
Re: Males and Females
I don't want to suggest that every SP woman has it easier than every SP man. There is always variation and I'm sure that there are plenty of women who have as bad a time as any male.
However, research does back up the claim that SP women are more likely to find partners than SP men. A SP woman is much more likley to be asked out by a man than a SP man is to be asked out by a woman.
Horatio said:
I don't want to suggest that every SP woman has it easier than every SP man. There is always variation and I'm sure that there are plenty of women who have as bad a time as any male.
However, research does back up the claim that SP women are more likely to find partners than SP men. A SP woman is much more likley to be asked out by a man than a SP man is to be asked out by a woman.
LittleMissScareAll
Well-known member
That isn't true. I'm a female with social phobia, and it's very hard for me to have relationships of any kind-- It's impossible for me to even make friends.
mrkyle
Member
interesting topic thats come up here... (you can tell by the ridiculous amount of replies!)
im not socially phobic, nor shy. i honestly think girls do have it easier than guys in the dating arena; and i don't mean it as a cop-out, or a 'my life is so hard' sort of way....
i'm straight, but because im not macho, the majority of people tend to get the impression that im gay. In the dating arena, this is a huuuuge setback. ill be honest; if im out, and looking to meet girls, ill talk to the girls i think are the cutest. (as an aside, my taste in women has been called strange). purely because its impractical to get to know EVERYONE in the room, so you get to know the one you think you'd like the most based on a glance. this is my view. So, girls often look at me, and bypass me; as they are under the impression i am gay at a glance. this doesnt happen to girls; you really have to go out of your way to look worse in order to be confused with a lesbian.
that and guys are supposed to make the first move makes things a little harder (but lets look at it as a challenge!).
im not socially phobic, nor shy. i honestly think girls do have it easier than guys in the dating arena; and i don't mean it as a cop-out, or a 'my life is so hard' sort of way....
i'm straight, but because im not macho, the majority of people tend to get the impression that im gay. In the dating arena, this is a huuuuge setback. ill be honest; if im out, and looking to meet girls, ill talk to the girls i think are the cutest. (as an aside, my taste in women has been called strange). purely because its impractical to get to know EVERYONE in the room, so you get to know the one you think you'd like the most based on a glance. this is my view. So, girls often look at me, and bypass me; as they are under the impression i am gay at a glance. this doesnt happen to girls; you really have to go out of your way to look worse in order to be confused with a lesbian.
that and guys are supposed to make the first move makes things a little harder (but lets look at it as a challenge!).
Rossettismuse1
Member
Definitely, it is harder for a man to find a Girlfriend.
An average or even below average woman (aesthetically) can go out to a pub or club and she will immediately be confronted by men showing a romantic interest in her. For a man, especially one that is very shy, it's extremely unlikely a woman will ever approach them.
It's no surprise that over 90% of people who seek professional help for S.A(ie. Pay for it) are single men.
Why do we keep lying about this?
An average or even below average woman (aesthetically) can go out to a pub or club and she will immediately be confronted by men showing a romantic interest in her. For a man, especially one that is very shy, it's extremely unlikely a woman will ever approach them.
It's no surprise that over 90% of people who seek professional help for S.A(ie. Pay for it) are single men.
Why do we keep lying about this?
lifesnotfair
Well-known member
so you wonder why i post responses like this.. i knew i was right
lifesnotfair
Well-known member
I totally agree....