Why do people believe relationships will make you happy?

[FriendlyShadow]

Yeah, I don't think relationships are a cure either. In fact, relationships are not my top priority in life. However, I understand that relationships are very important to people. (Although I do get annoyed by those who talk incessantly about dating and sex.) And yes some people think that relationships will lead to a happier life. They think this for all sorts of reasons. And like you mentioned, movies (and media in general) is one reason because it sells "romance" as the cure to life's problems. I'm not going to knock people for striving for relationships. That would be like me going to a fat person and saying "stop depending on food" or an alcoholic and saying "beer isn't the answer." They wouldn't like me saying that much :idontknow:

I understand a lot what you're saying. I agree, that relationships aren't supposed to be a top priority thing and and cure for your problems. Though I think people treat relationships in society as it being the most significant thing in solving their depression. I think because romantic movies/shows got them hooked on to that lovey-dovey kind of relationship where couples are perfectly happy and nothing actually in their lives bad ever happens to them. It's all the same: girl/boy are trying to find their perfect prince charming/princess and they end up being happily in love and getting married at the end. That's not a very healthy realistic expectation. Hollywood just sets up false, Utopian stereotypes while hiding back the real truth nobody wants to hear/see about. And some girls/guys who watch those movies/shows get brainwashed because that unhealthy Utopian expectation will happen to them in their lives. Yeah, I see what you're saying about people who constantly talk and think sex and dating is important in your life as well. I feel sorry for those who do want that the most in their lives because they haven't found other ways to keep themselves happy or occupied in their daily lives. But yeah, I mean I wouldn't walk up to a person and actually say it to their face why they think shouldn't depend on relationships to help them be happy. But I wish that people would stop thinking that it's supposed to actually make them happy to depend on having a relationship.

 

[FriendlyShadow]

Eh,having somebody who cares about me would be nice I guess.
A relationship isn't something that I feel like I NEED,but I'd be lying if I said that it probably wouldn't make me happier.
Who knows though.

Yeah, it would be nice when you have someone there to understand everything you're going through and try to help you, but it doesn't help take away all of your problems you're having. I'm not saying it wouldn't make you happier, but it won't make you happier in the long run when you are love wit someone who doesn't treat you good or suddenly breaking up with that person and then it will just make you go through an even more depressed phase than you already had been in. I'm not saying that people in relationships are a bad thing, but most depressed people when they are in one, don't get any much better in the end, even if they would've liked to have though they did. No matter what, relationships shouldn't be to make you happy if you're depressed.

 

[OceanMist]

I think just questioning whether relationships are good for someone is an accomplishment in itself. Society says relationships are what we should do....that's BS if you ask me. Why? Why should I do something most other people are doing? That doesn't mean they know what's best for me.

 

[FriendlyShadow]

I think just questioning whether relationships are good for someone is an accomplishment in itself. Society says relationships are what we should do....that's BS if you ask me. Why? Why should I do something most other people are doing? That doesn't mean they know what's best for me.

I agree and I think society doesn't like telling us the real truth so they end up creating lies and stereotypes to make people feel better. I don't think it's right because you're depressed, you need convincing of getting a boyfriend/girlfriend because you know it will make them feel happier. And what if most don't feel happy with themselves still? I don't like how our society is with trying enforce their propaganda rules on to everyone. You shouldn't care what others think but you shouldn't also care if having a relationship will make you happy. Why does it matter? Just for most people to get fun out of it and because they thought relationships would make them happy? Most people are just careless and they aren't thinking with their heads these days.

 

[Odo]

I think just questioning whether relationships are good for someone is an accomplishment in itself. Society says relationships are what we should do....that's BS if you ask me. Why? Why should I do something most other people are doing? That doesn't mean they know what's best for me.

Society tells us to do a lot of things, but I'm pretty sure that the urge to love, be loved and have sex was there before society existed.

If anything, society interferes with the natural processes of people getting together, because it makes it all about money.

 

[OceanMist]

I do agree that nature has an influence. A long time ago, yes, relationships and sex were around. Since the beginning of humans is my guess.

What I see nowadays is society has this status thing where if someone doesn't get into relationships they are supposedly "missing out."

Most people think for someone my age (29 years old) it's normal to be in a relationships at least every now and again.

I'm not saying relationships are bad at all, it's just I don't see why someone who is alone has to be seen as so taboo.

I've had people say "you need a g/f." What makes them sure that's my problem?

I personally think most people do stuff without thinking much about and that explains the insane divorce rate and high number of relationships that fail. I think there is a lot of people pleasing going on, as in pleasing friends and family by being in a relationship.

Maybe I'm just the odd one out. I believe in making sure a girl is a girl I love 100% before I jump into anything, and for me that would take time to get to know her. That may be part of the reason I'm alone.

 

[FriendlyShadow]

I do agree that nature has an influence. A long time ago, yes, relationships and sex were around. Since the beginning of humans is my guess.

What I see nowadays is society has this status thing where if someone doesn't get into relationships they are supposedly "missing out."

Most people think for someone my age (29 years old) it's normal to be in a relationships at least every now and again.

I'm not saying relationships are bad at all, it's just I don't see why someone who is alone has to be seen as so taboo.

I've had people say "you need a g/f." What makes them sure that's my problem?

I personally think most people do stuff without thinking much about and that explains the insane divorce rate and high number of relationships that fail. I think there is a lot of people pleasing going on, as in pleasing friends and family by being in a relationship.

Maybe I'm just the odd one out. I believe in making sure a girl is a girl I love 100% before I jump into anything, and for me that would take time to get to know her. That may be part of the reason I'm alone.

I agree very much of what you're saying OceanMist. People shouldn't be forced or convinced by others to do something they don't feel comfortable themselves of doing or that others think that getting in a relationship will feel better they did. Nobody should feel pressured to do it. I'm glad I'm not like most kids my age who just rush in carelessly into relationships and getting hurt.