Why can't I talk?

[gsmax5]

It isn't only approaching someone that I'm totally bad at, but I can't actually do the talking once I'm in the conversation either! My mind completely goes blank, and I'm just stuck there thinking about something to say, and contemplating whether or not it is appropriate for the current situation; either that, or just thinking "mmm... I really wish I had something to say right now". I'm not like this around people I know very well (pretty much just my family)

Is anyone else like this?

 

[lurknomore]

Yeah, that's how I am too. I can never think of anything to say at the moment I'm in the conversation (or rather around other people that are talking where I could say something if I wanted). Sometimes after the fact I think about something I could have said in the conversation- then I'm like "Oh, well, missed that chance"

 

[gsmax5]

Yeah, that's how I am too. I can never think of anything to say at the moment I'm in the conversation (or rather around other people that are talking where I could say something if I wanted). Sometimes after the fact I think about something I could have said in the conversation- then I'm like "Oh, well, missed that chance"

That happens to me a lot too. There's even a figure of speech for that in French:

L'esprit de l'escalier - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

[lyricalliaisons]

I think nearly everyone with social anxiety/phobia experiences that.

 

[Errordotocx]

It's because you care too much what the other person is thinking. You believe your mind is going "blank," but really, you are thinking about how you are being perceived.

Yeah thats pretty much it. Gotta learn to dgaf about stuff and just relax.

 

[Rise Against]

That happens to me all the time. Some times when im feeling brave ill start a conversation with someone but ill rehearse the conversation in my head over and over so i know exactly what i will say in advance. This kind of helps my mind from going blank.

 

[Ubersonic]

I just don't have anything to say on most subjects. Even if I didn't have SA I would still have nothing to say. Sports, politics, cars, popular entertainment, the news etc. These things are not in my interests. Within my small group of friends I can talk for hours about things that I enjoy, but when I am out by myself I can't relate to other people. Sometimes I'll find a fellow semi-geek, but never a girl :/

 

[lettypagb]

i used to now i can talk for hours but im afraid if i just start talkin i may look crazy ,since i am not very interested in what others have to say, but deep inside i know im just worried about what others may be thinking.

 

[tommydog]

The subconscious ability to communicate what peacegrrl ?

 

[Drongo]

Just as the rest do, I experience this aswell; I also have a problem ending conversations without seeming rude or inappropriate -- just poor social skills, I guess.

Lol, for some reason I can't help but remember that episode of Friends where Ross kissed his cousin and then couldn't think of an appropriate response.
(Ross thinking: Say anything. ...Nothing you say could make this situation worse. ...Oh my God this is the longest that anyone has not spoken ever!)

Haha, I remember that.

Sometimes after the fact I think about something I could have said in the conversation- then I'm like "Oh, well, missed that chance

Same, I analyze things alot.

 

[tommydog]

Reminds me of a guy I know. This guy will talk and talk and talk, one of those guys that goes off an a tangent with everything, then suddenly, he'll just say "ok bye" and hang up Lol !

 

[Ashiene]

I find talking to be a chore, so I'd rather type.

 

[Argamemnon]

That happens to me all the time. Some times when im feeling brave ill start a conversation with someone but ill rehearse the conversation in my head over and over so i know exactly what i will say in advance. This kind of helps my mind from going blank.

Same here, but when I do that, it comes across as forced or fake. It's because I'm too busy repressing my emotions and negative thoughts. I can see and feel that people don't enjoy chatting with me.