What is the difference between being a victim and having a victim mentality
- Thread starter KiaKaha
- Start date
This sounds so familiar. Did you or someone else post a thread about this before, or perhaps did some other thread become about this at some point?
FallenFeathers
Well-known member
A victim is someone who has been well genuinely.. the victim of something, it's a word used to describe someone who has been on the receiving end of something negative, criminal or damaging in some way.
Victim mentality tends to be someone who believes they are persecuted or wronged even when there is no real evidence to support it. It's a negative term which tends to be associated with people who instead of taking responsibility for their actions, blame others or believe everything to be some sort of personal attack against them even when it wasn't.
A victim mentality can actually become a personality trait, there are maybe lots of different reasons why someone might develop it though.
Victim mentality tends to be someone who believes they are persecuted or wronged even when there is no real evidence to support it. It's a negative term which tends to be associated with people who instead of taking responsibility for their actions, blame others or believe everything to be some sort of personal attack against them even when it wasn't.
A victim mentality can actually become a personality trait, there are maybe lots of different reasons why someone might develop it though.
Hellhound
Super Moderator
I can.
There's a difference between someone who talks about an issue at times, and someone who whines non stop if you don't agree with them all the time.
Example:
Person 1 = You know, there's this group at school who won't leave me alone, they're really mean to me and adults don't listen. They always call me names, put me down, break my stuff. I'm tired of them.
Person 2/ situation 2 =
Them: My mom abuses me, she's mean, I hate her.
Me: Why? What happened?
Them: She always tells me to clean my room, she took away my cellphone because I got an F on my test, she always tells me to spend less time on Tumblr and start improving my grades.
Me: Well... she's kinda right, you know? Your room is a mess and you aren't doing very well at school.
Them: You know nothing! How can you say that to me??!! You're mean, you bitch! My family abuses me all the time and you put me down like this! I hate you! BAWW
Or my favorite one
Them: I'm depressed...
Me: What's wrong?
Them: -insert long list of multiple issues-
Me: -insert advice/solution-
Them: -rejects- -rants about how everyone sucks-
Me: -insert a different advice/solution-
Them: -rejects- -rants about how everyone sucks-
Me: I don't really know what to tell you, man... :1
Them: I knew it, you're just like them! I was feeling down enough as it is and you just had to bring me down more! I was just looking for someone to talk to and you had to be so rude!!1!!1 I HAET YOU, BAWWW
I hope that helped.
There's a difference between someone who talks about an issue at times, and someone who whines non stop if you don't agree with them all the time.
Example:
Person 1 = You know, there's this group at school who won't leave me alone, they're really mean to me and adults don't listen. They always call me names, put me down, break my stuff. I'm tired of them.
Person 2/ situation 2 =
Them: My mom abuses me, she's mean, I hate her.
Me: Why? What happened?
Them: She always tells me to clean my room, she took away my cellphone because I got an F on my test, she always tells me to spend less time on Tumblr and start improving my grades.
Me: Well... she's kinda right, you know? Your room is a mess and you aren't doing very well at school.
Them: You know nothing! How can you say that to me??!! You're mean, you bitch! My family abuses me all the time and you put me down like this! I hate you! BAWW
Or my favorite one
Them: I'm depressed...
Me: What's wrong?
Them: -insert long list of multiple issues-
Me: -insert advice/solution-
Them: -rejects- -rants about how everyone sucks-
Me: -insert a different advice/solution-
Them: -rejects- -rants about how everyone sucks-
Me: I don't really know what to tell you, man... :1
Them: I knew it, you're just like them! I was feeling down enough as it is and you just had to bring me down more! I was just looking for someone to talk to and you had to be so rude!!1!!1 I HAET YOU, BAWWW
I hope that helped.
bcsr
Well-known member
^ lol, pretty good.
Just some common traits of someone with a victim mentality:
Blaming others for a situation that one you created, being unwilling to take responsibility.
Interpreting things as negative that aren't. (everyone gives me dirty looks, for instance)
Feeling that other people are just luckier than you.
Telling exaggerated stories about bad things that happened to you.
Overly defensive, reading negative intention in neutral statements and responding with accusation.
Overly stubborn, ignoring suggestions are criticism that might be beneficial.
Using a lot of "definite" statements, like can't or won't.
Just some common traits of someone with a victim mentality:
Blaming others for a situation that one you created, being unwilling to take responsibility.
Interpreting things as negative that aren't. (everyone gives me dirty looks, for instance)
Feeling that other people are just luckier than you.
Telling exaggerated stories about bad things that happened to you.
Overly defensive, reading negative intention in neutral statements and responding with accusation.
Overly stubborn, ignoring suggestions are criticism that might be beneficial.
Using a lot of "definite" statements, like can't or won't.
Agent_Violet
Well-known member
people who aren't of the victim mentality are easily able to detect those with that victim mentality. People who ARE of the victim mentality seem to struggle spotting it and can't recognize it in themselves most of the time.
Be careful if you try to tell them they have a victim mentality bc they'll either become irate and defensive or they'll write you off completely and never speak to you again.