What is the biggest lie you've ever told to avoid a situation?

[SadSally]

Just curious.
I know this sounds bad, but I started skipping college, my attendance was so poor the principal called me to her office and demanded an explanation. I didn't know what else to say so I told her my father died and that I was grieving. My father is a deadbeat and emotionally he is dead to me. Last year he just abandoned me and ignores me since he got a new girlfriend.
Anyway, the principal said she understood and that I could have a week off to grieve. She said that I had to explain to my teachers that my assignments would be late. I also had to go and ask for the new assignments. The thought of tracking down six teachers and talking to authority figures was enough to keep me away forever. I didn't go back. I felt bad for lying because the principal was so nice about it.

 

[SCP-087-1]

There was this person I couldn't stand. They wouldn't take the hint and leave me alone. So I told them I went to jail and will be gone for a long time

 

[slimjim119]

I try not to lie anymore. I just try to tough out any situation that arises. The only excuses I can think of is that I'm not feeling well. I use my health as an excuse. I would say I have a migraine. Which I frequently get at times.

 

[TheNomad]

There was this person I couldn't stand. They wouldn't take the hint and leave me alone. So I told them I went to jail and will be gone for a long time

Wow that's awesome

 

[MollyBeGood]

There was this person I couldn't stand. They wouldn't take the hint and leave me alone. So I told them I went to jail and will be gone for a long time

Wow and they believed you?

I told my ex I was in Texas so he wouldn't bother me. That might be the biggest lie I ever told.

 

[Hoppy]

"Thank you, it was a great day. Hope to see you soon."

 

[Zooman]

The biggest lie? Idk if these are "big" lies, but they are the first 2 that i thought of off the top of my head. The first one is when my dad accidentally looked at my search history when i was a little kid and found it loaded with porn (i was a horny little fella). That was pretty ****ing embarrassing so i lied and told him i just looked it up because I was "curious". The second lie of mine that I can remember was when I told a kid in one of my classes in early high school that I was sorry (for god knows what) so that he wuld stop telling the class bully that i was cursing him out behind his back.

 

[Zooman]

I killed the thread didn't i?

 

[Sarah_M]

^ hahaha I have much more embarrassing stories regarding porn that I have lied about, don't worry.

 

[S_Spartan]

^ hahaha I have much more embarrassing stories regarding porn that I have lied about, don't worry.

*rests head in hands* let's hear 'em!

 

[Sarah_M]

*rests head in hands* let's hear 'em!

*takes a shot of tequila* Okay, so when I was a teenager I was basically obsessed with porn (aren't we all?) and watched it everyday (after school and late at night).

I had an old dinosaur computer with dial-up and was watching porn and it froze - I thought my mom was asleep but she came downstairs and saw an very uhh, "interesting" image on the screen - I lied and said we had a virus with lots of porn pop-ups and it froze lol.

After school one day, I was looking for some afternoon delight and saw an intriguing porn title - I selected it to read the description (you had to pay for it, but I wanted to see how hot it was lol) and I accidently hit the wrong button and ordered it. I had to tell my mom that the remote glitched out and hit the wrong button - she called the cable company and said her "son" ordered a dirty movie - sorry mom haha.

I was watching A Clockwork Orange with my friends downstairs and my mom came downstairs during the rape scene AND at the sped up sex scene part - I wasn't watching porn, but I had to play stupid and say I had no idea it had this kind of stuff in it.

My brother was living with my mom and I and I was watching Dawn Of The Dead and my brother did that knock twice shit and walk in - well, he walked in right during the sex scene at the mall, saw what I was watching and closed the door really fast. We never talked about it...
I wasn't watching porn, but he thought I was.

mg:

 

[Zooman]

*takes a shot of tequila* Okay, so when I was a teenager I was basically obsessed with porn (aren't we all?) and watched it everyday (after school and late at night).

I had an old dinosaur computer with dial-up and was watching porn and it froze - I thought my mom was asleep but she came downstairs and saw an very uhh, "interesting" image on the screen - I lied and said we had a virus with lots of porn pop-ups and it froze lol.

After school one day, I was looking for some afternoon delight and saw an intriguing porn title - I selected it to read the description (you had to pay for it, but I wanted to see how hot it was lol) and I accidently hit the wrong button and ordered it. I had to tell my mom that the remote glitched out and hit the wrong button - she called the cable company and said her "son" ordered a dirty movie - sorry mom haha.

I was watching A Clockwork Orange with my friends downstairs and my mom came downstairs during the rape scene AND at the sped up sex scene part - I wasn't watching porn, but I had to play stupid and say I had no idea it had this kind of stuff in it.

My brother was living with my mom and I and I was watching Dawn Of The Dead and my brother did that knock twice shit and walk in - well, he walked in right during the sex scene at the mall, saw what I was watching and closed the door really fast. We never talked about it...
I wasn't watching porn, but he thought I was.

mg:

Those are definitely some good one's xD I've had my fair share of close calls throughout my life but then I just got smart and started locking my door. I'm pretty sure my family knows what is up when they try to open my door and it is locked, but igaf anymore lol.

 

[S_Spartan]

*takes a shot of tequila* Okay, so when I was a teenager I was basically obsessed with porn (aren't we all?) and watched it everyday (after school and late at night).

I had an old dinosaur computer with dial-up and was watching porn and it froze - I thought my mom was asleep but she came downstairs and saw an very uhh, "interesting" image on the screen - I lied and said we had a virus with lots of porn pop-ups and it froze lol.

After school one day, I was looking for some afternoon delight and saw an intriguing porn title - I selected it to read the description (you had to pay for it, but I wanted to see how hot it was lol) and I accidently hit the wrong button and ordered it. I had to tell my mom that the remote glitched out and hit the wrong button - she called the cable company and said her "son" ordered a dirty movie - sorry mom haha.

I was watching A Clockwork Orange with my friends downstairs and my mom came downstairs during the rape scene AND at the sped up sex scene part - I wasn't watching porn, but I had to play stupid and say I had no idea it had this kind of stuff in it.

My brother was living with my mom and I and I was watching Dawn Of The Dead and my brother did that knock twice shit and walk in - well, he walked in right during the sex scene at the mall, saw what I was watching and closed the door really fast. We never talked about it...
I wasn't watching porn, but he thought I was.

mg:

Oh man! The accidentally ordering of porn was my favorite! "Mom had to call the cable company." hilarious!

 

[Xervello]

^ hahaha I have much more embarrassing stories regarding porn that I have lied about, don't worry.

Yeah, there's only so many times I can blame "wikipedia" for all my porn viruses. I started using "Drudge Report" after awhile. In situations such as that, everyone knows what's going on; people are just too polite to say it. Thank goodness for that, right. :thumbup: