To be honest, I'm not sure your average woman would notice much of a difference between an APD man and one without it. Lots of men are reserved and generally quite insular. I feel that sociable, outgoing men are in fact the minority.
In any case, I make it a point not to label myself with anything when I meet someone new, and in many instances people don't notice anything all that different about me. I don't mention that I can't really make phone calls, that I won't open the front door to people I don't know, that I flunked college due to social anxiety, that I'm too fearful of working a job in the real world and that I've never had any friends to speak of. It all sounds like a huge obstacle when I list it like that, but I've learned that it doesn't have to be a big deal if you don't make it a big deal. They are all things that can be introduced gradually without any one thing being a dealbreaker. That being the case, I'd go so far as to say an avoidant male can offer a woman more or less everything a regular guy could. It's got more to do with chemistry (for example, whether she's a little shy/introverted herself) than anything else. Of course, this may be different for those with severe APD, but I would say that people with mild to moderate cases are far from hopeless when it comes to love and relationships.
In any case, I make it a point not to label myself with anything when I meet someone new, and in many instances people don't notice anything all that different about me. I don't mention that I can't really make phone calls, that I won't open the front door to people I don't know, that I flunked college due to social anxiety, that I'm too fearful of working a job in the real world and that I've never had any friends to speak of. It all sounds like a huge obstacle when I list it like that, but I've learned that it doesn't have to be a big deal if you don't make it a big deal. They are all things that can be introduced gradually without any one thing being a dealbreaker. That being the case, I'd go so far as to say an avoidant male can offer a woman more or less everything a regular guy could. It's got more to do with chemistry (for example, whether she's a little shy/introverted herself) than anything else. Of course, this may be different for those with severe APD, but I would say that people with mild to moderate cases are far from hopeless when it comes to love and relationships.
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That is all I could do when I read "I just don't like calling myself that."