Uncomfortable around Opposite Sex

J

jaim38

Well-known member
I feel uncomfortable around people of the opposite sex. It's not that I feel sexually attracted everytime I'm around them. It's more like I
have trouble interacting and socializing with them. How uncomfortable I get depends on the attractiveness and 'macho-ness' of the guy. For example, if the guy is very attractive, I get very uncomfortable and want to run
away. If the guy is not so attractive, then I have little problems socializing with him.

**Note: I should mention that I feel uncomfortable around beautiful people of both genders. I have trouble making eye contact with them and tend to
avert their gaze.

Anyways, recently I found myself feeling uncomfortable around my brother and my dad, and I'm very ashamed to say this. When my brother touches me a certain way or when my dad looks at me, my heart jumps and I feel very uneasy. No, I don't feel sexually attracted to any of them, but I'm not sure why I do this. I know this is very wrong.

Does anybody have similar experiences or suggestions on how to overcome this?

I think I should also point out that I come from a culture that is sort of conservative when it comes to gender relations. There is more segregation of genders in my culture; girls tend to hang out with girls, and guys with guys. So when I come to America, it was awkward for me to see how intimately women and men interact with each other. Some people are not afraid to share nude pics or 'flash' each other their private parts, if you
know what I mean.
 
I

Icepep

Member
If you come from a different culture, and have not been in America for so very long, this could have an effect. If you are just not used to being around the opposite sex. If you feel uncomfortable around attractive people of both genders it might be a low self esteem, or the way you see yourself?

I too can feel uncomfortable around other people, specially opposite sex. Altough this is mostly before I get to know them (takes a long time though :p).

Don't know about your dad / brother issue, but it's not that you relate it too other guys (or girls) looking / touching you. So when your brother touches you a certain way, you subconsciously "think" about other people or things. Might be some Freudian stuff too :p

Don't really got any good tips for you here. Other than feeling a little uncomfortable around attractive people of the opposite sex might just be a little normal (depends of course how uncomfortable). And still, they might be more afraid of you, then you are of them :p

Anyway, I'm not an expert on this, just wrote down what I could think of. Could be the complete opposite of what I have said. :p
 
surewhynot

surewhynot

Well-known member
Don't beat yourself up for being uncomfortable around your brother or father, it happens to me too. Some people have a closer relationship with their family members than others do, it's okay.
 
Cyanide2601

Cyanide2601

Active member
I get that, i am so uncomfortable around attractive men, especially macho ones. I feel as if they are judging me, even though they probably couldn't care less!
 
Arthur_Dent

Arthur_Dent

1
That's the core of my social phobia. I can handle pretty well formal interactions with the opposite sex, but when it comes to real socialization, I get as avoidant as possible.
 
Flanscho

Flanscho

Well-known member
Hmmm no, the sex of the person I am with doesn't really have any impact on how comfortable I am.
 
A

Amitush123

Well-known member
Know what you mean, when I see a beautiful wome, the first thing that comes to mind is "there is no way that such beauty will agree to someone as ugly and loser such as myself"
 
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