The voice of experience.

[Lccska]

Hello to you all. I recently introduced my Daughter to this site. She's going to be mortified when she see's this post. I've checked in twice to see what people are saying. I just feel I need to give you all some hope. I was a frightened child, but my Dad was a mean Alcoholic, and I thought I had a reason to be fearful. When I was 28 I became pregnant with my beautiful Daughter. I started having panic attacks at that time. Over the next 6 or 7 years I had good Psychiatric help. I then plunged into a horrible depression, and ended up having shock treatments. It sounds archiac to have shock treatments, but I'd do it again in a second, because I got better. I'm now 51 years old, and have a wonderful life.
I want you all to remember a few things when he comes to getting better:
1-It doesn't matter what anybody thinks of you. It only matters what YOU think. Don't buy in to what people say about you, even if it's your parents. You're all wonderful people deserving of love.
2- Take a "small step" everyday. Even if it's just getting out of bed, going outside for a second, then returning to bed. It's still a step.
3-surround yourself with positive people. Negative people will keep you down. If you are with negative people, get away from them. Even if it's parents. Go to a Social Service agency and ask for help. Anybody can have a baby. That doesn't mean they SHOULD have a baby.
4- The world can be a mean place. It can also be a wonderful place. Attitude is everything. Try to be positive and take it 1 day at a time. You don't have to whip the world, just learn how to live in it. Forget the past. It doesn't matter anymore.
5- try to help someone else. I found that helping others made me feel good about myself. I see you all helping each other on this site, and it's wonderful. Try to be a positive role model.
6- "Get out of your head". Thinking about your illness constantly will literally drive you nuts. Leave it all behind for a while each day. It will be there when you get back to it.
7- You can all figure out how to live with your illnesses. I control my illness. It no longer controls me. It took some time, but it's worth the effort.
I wish you all the best of luck!!!!!!!! I want this site to be my Daughters "thing", so I'm only going to "check in" every once in a while. I hope she forgives her old Mom for being a snoop. I love her with all of my heart and want nothing more from life than for her and the rest of you to get better. I'm proof that it can happen. I love my life!!!!!!!!!

 

[Feathers]

Hi Lccska! Well, I think this is a beautiful post!

If your daughter is mortified, maybe she's at an age when all girls are mortified by their moms
I know I've been mortified by my mom before, and still think she's awesome

Parents and kids can be difficult relationships.. Sometimes problems may run in families, but we also have to remember that our parents and grandparents gave us a lot of wonderful traits too...
Like, many people with depression and/or sa are much more caring, thoughtful, intelligent, etc.

Alcoholism is a big problem that causes grief to many families... Did you get any Al-Anon counselling or such? My mum had an alcoholic dad too, and it does affect people...

Glad to hear things got so much better for you & hoping the same for your daughter too!! She'll be very Welcome at this site too!

Thank you for the good wishes!!

 

[Sial Axetder]

Shock treatments!? Oh, right. I self administer those anytime I want to check if a 9volt battery still has juice. ZZZAP. Bit of a buzz and a metallic taste.

I wouldn't call it illness. Would simply place it under who we are. Which is why it takes so much effort to change. Are we not, in fact, attempting to change who are we into another?

 

[dottie]

overbaring parents snooping on their adult children. how fun and liberating.

 

[Aussie_Lad]

Very inspirational, thank you.

 

[superfluouslyme]

overbaring parents snooping on their adult children. how fun and liberating.

I've been debating about whether to say something. I usually let things go and vent on unsuspecting people later, but I'm trying this new thing where I tell people straight to their face what I'm thinking. So, here it goes.

As the mentioned daughter of the wonderful OP, I'm going to take great offense to your post if I am in fact understanding you correctly. She found this site for me, read some of ya'lls posts before I joined, and has stayed away ever since. I talk to her about the site all the time and she keeps telling me how horrible she feels for many of the people on this site. She and I both know how lucky I am to have someone who has been through it all before and she desperately wishes that all of you had/have the support that I have. She is also an RN who worked on the psych ward for 15 years before and during her own illness, so she has seen a lot. She has seen many people make it through and many people who just give up and she doesn't want any of you to give up. I know she didn't come back to this site to spy on me and to see what I have to say. She came back to share her success story and to give all of us, from those who are feeling pretty damn good to those that can't wait to die, some hope. I doubt she will get back on here to respond to your posts, but I truly felt the need to defend her. She is an amazing, wonderful woman and I would be hopeless without her.
And I'm not the slightest bit mortified. I am so proud that she has the guts to be so open with her story. I'm certainly not.

I did not mean to derail this thread, but I couldn't keep my fat mouth shut. Rant over. Goodnight.

 

[agoraphobickatie]

superfluouslyme you are truly blessed to have a mom that cares, listens, understands and wants to help! i'm glad you can realize it, it's pretty awesome my mom has been through a lot of what i go through, so she is the same way, she knows just what to say when i need to hear it.. your mom is a total sweetheart for posting!

and anyway, it's refreshing to see a parent that way... a lot of people on here always complain that their parents "suck" or "don't understand" or don't care.. so it's nice to see someone with a healthy relationship with a parent.. best wishes to you both!!

 

[DespairSoul]

Lccska,

Beautiful post. Is very nice of u support your daughter.
Many people for sure wish to have support like that and go for advice to parents, but not all parents are supportive. Many sweet nice people have not frends, family turn back to them and argue with them coz they don't understand to them, many people ridicule "mental illness" like we are weirdos. For many people is shame even go to psychiatrist. Nothing is about it shame but something hold us back. A lot of people is not supportive and they don't have clue what we are going trough. Tough is hard to fit in. But we don't have to fit, we already fit we just must realize it? Well i like your post and i wish for u and your daughter which is already here with us all the best!!!

Thank u for sharing!!!

 

[coyote]

overbaring parents snooping on their adult children. how fun and liberating.

sometimes our own past personal experiences color our opinions of strangers

 

[miss_amy]

What a lovely inspirational thread. 'Snooping' can also be seen as caring and it sounds like you have a wonderful mom/daughter bond. I can understand things from the parent side being a mother of 4 myself. I'm not sure snooping is a good word really, it's taking an interest in your child (however old they are always your child) and wanting the best possible for them.

I find it very positive and uplifting to hear of others progress. It gives me hope and keeps me fighting and every day my life becomes better for it.

So thank you.

 

[Sial Axetder]

I've been debating about whether to say something. I usually let things go and vent on unsuspecting people later, but I'm trying this new thing where I tell people straight to their face what I'm thinking. So, here it goes.

As the mentioned daughter of the wonderful OP, I'm going to take great offense to your post if I am in fact understanding you correctly. She found this site for me, read some of ya'lls posts before I joined, and has stayed away ever since. I talk to her about the site all the time and she keeps telling me how horrible she feels for many of the people on this site. She and I both know how lucky I am to have someone who has been through it all before and she desperately wishes that all of you had/have the support that I have. She is also an RN who worked on the psych ward for 15 years before and during her own illness, so she has seen a lot. She has seen many people make it through and many people who just give up and she doesn't want any of you to give up. I know she didn't come back to this site to spy on me and to see what I have to say. She came back to share her success story and to give all of us, from those who are feeling pretty damn good to those that can't wait to die, some hope. I doubt she will get back on here to respond to your posts, but I truly felt the need to defend her. She is an amazing, wonderful woman and I would be hopeless without her.
And I'm not the slightest bit mortified. I am so proud that she has the guts to be so open with her story. I'm certainly not.

I did not mean to derail this thread, but I couldn't keep my fat mouth shut. Rant over. Goodnight.

Would it be too bold to state a brave one are you? Struck with expectancy daughter would not come forth. Expectancy turned unexpected.

Well done.

Perhaps a warrior spirit. A need, truly, to defend. Keep that.

 

[dottie]

glad you have a good relationship with your mom. sorry to offend. obviously i was projecting my own issues. yes, i would be livid if my mom "snooped" me online but then we don't have a great relationship.