Oh well. Everyone I knew from work is the, "you're a nice guy as long as you don't actually try to be my friend" type of person. The one person I was still talking to about going out has now become a twunt like all the others, and is telling me, "yes we can go out for a quick drink, sorry for not answering your messages" and then carrying on and ignoring me. Why does everyone do this? Why do they all have mysterious memory/phone/credit problems? Why can't they just tell me to leave them alone if that's what they want?
So I've now been out of work for about 10 months, and the money I saved up by having no life is drying up bit by bit. Nothing has changed. 23rd birthday went by like every other one. I know I should try to get a job but I can't get any motivation - any self esteem I built up is gone, I feel like ****, I don't want to get myself stuck in another rut and I don't know why I scared off all of the people I met before. When I was working a year ago it was a weird mix of growing confidence and yet still wondering every day why I couldn't get close to anyone. Why bother unless you badly need the money? I'm sick of the constantly shifting goalposts (things will change when you go to school - college - get a job - get another job). Even my parents say I will make friends when I get a job, completely ignoring the fact that I had one with sociable people and which I really enjoyed for two and a half years. I remember thinking to myself near the end, in the middle of a day there, "if I can't get a friend here, then I won't get one anywhere." Maybe next time will be different, but it won't, will it.
I would try to join a club but how do you even start? How do you find them? Frankly I hate any kind of club or group even doing things I like so where does that leave me!?
Please give me some ideas.
(Also, it would be good if you could tell me how much of a bad idea it would be to tell the 27 aforementioned twunts, in a Facebook status update, that they are all twunts. Not that half of them would probably even read it. None of them know where I live - it may be fun for five minutes to provoke some reactions? Do I really care any more?)
So I've now been out of work for about 10 months, and the money I saved up by having no life is drying up bit by bit. Nothing has changed. 23rd birthday went by like every other one. I know I should try to get a job but I can't get any motivation - any self esteem I built up is gone, I feel like ****, I don't want to get myself stuck in another rut and I don't know why I scared off all of the people I met before. When I was working a year ago it was a weird mix of growing confidence and yet still wondering every day why I couldn't get close to anyone. Why bother unless you badly need the money? I'm sick of the constantly shifting goalposts (things will change when you go to school - college - get a job - get another job). Even my parents say I will make friends when I get a job, completely ignoring the fact that I had one with sociable people and which I really enjoyed for two and a half years. I remember thinking to myself near the end, in the middle of a day there, "if I can't get a friend here, then I won't get one anywhere." Maybe next time will be different, but it won't, will it.
I would try to join a club but how do you even start? How do you find them? Frankly I hate any kind of club or group even doing things I like so where does that leave me!?
Please give me some ideas.
(Also, it would be good if you could tell me how much of a bad idea it would be to tell the 27 aforementioned twunts, in a Facebook status update, that they are all twunts. Not that half of them would probably even read it. None of them know where I live - it may be fun for five minutes to provoke some reactions? Do I really care any more?)
