I am lonely without a lot of friends and dream of a life with friends and a soul mate, and yet whenever a social opportunity presents itself I dread it and would rather be by myself. As much as I want to be social, I find that I usually don't enjoy the company of others at all. Anyone else do this.
Social Contradiction
- Thread starter anxiousnut
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Rembrandt Broam
Well-known member
I wouldn't say I don't enjoy the company of others at all, but I am pretty selective over the people whose company I do enjoy. I also tend to prefer one-to-one company, not large groups of friends. But I do value and need a lot of time by myself - probably much more than the average person. This makes it difficult to maintain friendships, as most people want to hang out with their friends far more than I would be comfortable with, which leads people to believe that I'm just not interested in being friends with them. This can be extremely frustrating. :
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Rufus
Well-known member
It's probably due to the anxiety (or whatever you may wish to call it) you've grown to associate with groups of people.
Can't be relaxed if you are anxious, can't really enjoy a social event if you aren't relaxed. It becomes a vicious cycle really.
Silentknight
Well-known member
I go through that alot I want what you want especially the soulmate because I've always been fascinated by the idea of being loved by someone and them loving me back but also like you I won't talk to anyone through fear of an anxiety or panic attack. I think this is just the sad cycle most of us will have to deal with and unfortunately a few of us will never break out of but regardless we still have to fight to get better no matter how long it takes.
And here it is again. Circles. Say it a lot. A ticking on a time bomb that never reaches detonation.
AvPD, its a wondrous thing.
I wouldn't say I don't enjoy the company of others at all, but I am pretty selective over the people whose company I do enjoy. I also tend to prefer one-to-one company, not large groups of friends. But I do value and need a lot of time by myself - probably much more than the average person. This makes it difficult to maintain friendships, as most people want to hang out with their friends far more than I would be comfortable with, which leads people to believe that I'm just not interested in being friends with them. This can be extremely frustrating. :
I'm the same as him/her
IamThisOne
Well-known member
I will crave social contact with people, so I go over to my brother's house where there is a lot of nice and friendly people. When I get there I am so afraid to interact. I will just skulk around in the background or just stay in my brother's room. I can't even go in by myself, I have to get my brother to meet me at the door. I just feel like no one wants me there; I know that is not so, it's just my thoughts.
I get so afraid that I end up leaving not long after I arrive. When I get back home I get so depressed because I am alone again and I think, "why didn't I stay?".
I get so afraid that I end up leaving not long after I arrive. When I get back home I get so depressed because I am alone again and I think, "why didn't I stay?".
staticreflex
Well-known member
I do the same thing, I can make big plans on how to improve my life and I definitely have the ability to do it but it seems something else inside me always jumps up with a reason not to do it like I'm afraid of success or something. I think it must have something to do with my childhood but I don't know what.