Should I just forget about her?

S

schist

Well-known member
So last week I met this girl who I'd spoken to on Facebook for a couple of months (I feel kinda stupid saying that) for the first time in person, at a mutual friend's birthday shindig. I like to think I left a good first impression, and we got to actually properly know each other a little better. At the end of the night I got her phone number, and a couple of days later I sent her a text asking if she wanted to catch up for a coffee sometime this week whenever she was free, to which I received no response. I figured that she was busy, since she said she was working all this weekend (I contacted her on Saturday) and that maybe she didn't have time to respond.

A couple of hours ago I decided to bite the bullet and actually call her (after much deliberation), but it just went straight to her voicemail. I thought for a second that she was tired from work, but then slowly came the realization that she may be avoiding me.

So I logged into Facebook today to see that she'd removed a photo of the two of us that had been taken from her profile. Thereby further confirming my suspicions.

So, what should I do? Be patient, and let things pan out? Or just delete her number/Facebook and forget about her?
 
GillyMarie

GillyMarie

Active member
It's a hard one to call, although it does seem that she's avoiding you from everything you just said. Someone from the outside looking in. If I were you, I wouldn't try contact again. The balls in her court now. :)
 
Shyangel

Shyangel

Well-known member
I would maybe sit and wait it out a little longer before you make an assumption. How many days has it been exactly? It does sound like she's avoiding you I got to admit, and if this continues for much longer, I wouldn't waste my time. Don't spend your time chasing someones who treats you badly. You are better then that. There are plenty of women in the world, if I were you, I would go look for another.
 
S

schist

Well-known member
Shyangel said:
I would maybe sit and wait it out a little longer before you make an assumption. How many days has it been exactly? It does sound like she's avoiding you I got to admit, and if this continues for much longer, I wouldn't waste my time. Don't spend your time chasing someones who treats you badly. You are better then that. There are plenty of women in the world, if I were you, I would go look for another.
Click to expand...

I first properly met her last Wednesday.

Dunno, maybe she was freaked out by me asking her out for coffee.
 
Shyangel

Shyangel

Well-known member
schist said:
I first properly met her last Wednesday.

Dunno, maybe she was freaked out by me asking her out for coffee.
Click to expand...

I don't know why she should, it's a perfectly normal unfreaky thing to ask.
It's definitely not your fault. You seem to me like a nice guy who asked nicely whether or not a girl wants to go out, there's nothing wrong with that. Maybe she's just uncomfortable in these situations, but still. She should, through some avenue, respond to you. You don't want to be friends or whatever, with someone who's gonna ignore you when you say something there not comfortable with instead of just telling you how they feel. I would maybe wait a couple of days and if she doesn't respond to anything, forget about her. I know it sucks and it's annoying to keep going through this but this woman isn't worth any thought or effort if this continues.
 
MrJones

MrJones

Well-known member
I always make a lot of mistakes, but I know people don't want to be pushed or bothered too much. I don't know, if she likes you she may be happy to see your interest, but if she doesn't...

If you want to call her, go ahead. Good luck.

I do know it hurts to feel ignored and avoided, so try to not have too many expectations or you'll be heartbroken.
 
Aletheia

Aletheia

Well-known member
I wouldn't do any deleting, no point closing doors unnecessarily.

But I also agree with GillyMarie: the ball is in her court now. She has to want to play.
 
OceanMist

OceanMist

Well-known member
If you have texted her and left a message on her voice mail, definitely stop contacting her and if she wants to talk to you, let her make the next move. You've done more than enough to show your interest.

I think after you sent that text you should have stopped trying to contact her. On something like a phone you should only try to reach someone like that for a first date one time, and if they don't respond, move on.

You don't want to create a reputation as the guy who kept bothering a girl when she didn't respond. I did that b4 and blew any chance of getting with that girl.
 
Iluv

Iluv

Well-known member
Ahh I know exactly how you feel. I think for now don't over analyze something, I don't blame your suspicions you have profound reasons to think that but right now I think you need to just let things pan out as they are going. It's hard to call what had happened with her but perhaps she has a boyfriend now or found you coming on too strong. Girls are weird like that, I should know since I am one ::p: . I say you should just forget about her, if she is going to treat you like that she isn't worth the time. Hope it all works out for you.
 
S

schist

Well-known member
OceanMist said:
If you have texted her and left a message on her voice mail, definitely stop contacting her and if she wants to talk to you, let her make the next move. You've done more than enough to show your interest.
Click to expand...

I didn't leave a voicemail message, I just hung up.

I'm not making the effort to contact her anymore, I've no time to play stupid games.
 
S

schist

Well-known member
UPDATE: Went out on a coffee date with her today. We enjoyed ourselves just chatting, then we went for a stroll down the street and sat in the park and talked for a bit. Did get kinda thrown off when I got a one-armed frontal hug from her when it was time to say goodbye, but she did say she was keen for a second date.

I think I'm gonna have to tread this one with caution ...
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top