dottie
Well-known member
I have to say, your posts make me feel really sad. I don't pity you, but it's undeniably sad that you're so starved for affection. I don't mean that with any malice, it just does sadden me. I'm a really tactile person and I actually can't imagine how difficult it must be for you.
That being said it's really difficult to comment. I don't think what you're suggesting is morally wrong, but my instinct is to say that an experience you pay for.. while it may be physically gratifying.. won't be emotionally fulfilling. You won't be able to emotionally develop with this person, and to be honest there's also a danger you'll become reliant on that rather than developing real human connections. You're still so young, too, it isn't like you're fifty and have never been hugged.
My advice would be just be really patient. It must be so hard, I can't imagine.. but if you've waited this long, just try waiting a little longer. You say you've only recently joined this site to try and make connections.. well.. give it time, join up on other sites if first contact face-to-face is a bit scary. Hopefully you'll be able to make an emotional connection and then the physical can follow.
I genuinely believe that if you wait the whole experience will be so much more gratifying.
amp so eloquently sums it up again!
don't do this. it may give you some sort of momentary gratification, but afterward you will only be left more confused and tortured.