Pavlina website: NO COMPASSION, NO UNDERSTANDING..

[BlueRose]

I was on a support website called pavlina and I just want to tell you that I'm never going back to that sight because they banned me without a warning and on top of that, they sent me an e-mailed message that was so shocking and devastating. What they wrote on that message was very insulting and disrespectfull. If I did or said something inappropriate, they should bring it to my attention more mildly. Messages like that could cause people like myself to have a nervous breakdown or worse. Luckily I was able to deal with it and just never return to that site. It shows that the pavlina's are cold and careless. I don't know WHY they have a supportive website, the members their are not very supportive, they're mostly critical and judgemental. I quoted the message at the bottom from my e-mail to show you how despicable they are..

From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, May 22, 2009 4:59 PM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Pity Parties

Our forums aren't for people who just want to bitch and complain (i.e. pity parties) They're for people who take responsibility for their lives and are looking for solutions they can apply. So I can understand why the mods banned you. Members like you simply annoy people and bring others down. What positive contributions did you make that would make our community better? Our forums are for people who are dedicated to growing, not complaining.

 

[WelshOne]

Part of getting better is talking about your problems, so if they arent supportive when you need to express how youre feeling then youre better off not bothering with them anyway.

Better off here

 

[BlueRose]

Part of getting better is talking about your problems, so if they arent supportive when you need to express how youre feeling then youre better off not bothering with them anyway.

Better off here

I just hope this thread doesn't get me banned..

 

[Sacrament]

You can't spend your entire life complaining about how much it sucks. I know it's hard (hell, I think all of us do), but no one can do it for you. Although the message you quoted was harsh, it's fairly accurate. When you've been a member of SPW for a long time, you'll notice two different things: the positive aspect is that you finally know there's a place for you to be among people who share the same "condition(s)" and therefore will understand; on the other hand, all the self-pitying and "complaining" you'll read is going to make you extremely depressed, because you'll see things like people trying the methods you're trying and failing, helpless situations and so forth.

This is why some people decide to leave SPW. Yes, there are more people like you and that's great, but all the problems and situations you read about are going to pile up inside of you and, at some point, will make you feel like it's not helping at all.

 

[BlueRose]

You can't spend your entire life complaining about how much it sucks. I know it's hard (hell, I think all of us do), but no one can do it for you. Although the message you quoted was harsh, it's fairly accurate. When you've been a member of SPW for a long time, you'll notice two different things: the positive aspect is that you finally know there's a place for you to be among people who share the same "condition(s)" and therefore will understand; on the other hand, all the self-pitying and "complaining" you'll read is going to make you extremely depressed, because you'll see things like people trying the methods you're trying and failing, helpless situations and so forth.

This is why some people decide to leave SPW. Yes, there are more people like you and that's great, but all the problems and situations you read about are going to pile up inside of you and, at some point, will make you feel like it's not helping at all.

I still don't think they should make that type of remark.. If I caused too much drama in any case I should be informed more mildly or they should tone it down.. A remark like that could have a bad effect on people like myself as I stated on my last post.

 

[WelshOne]

Not everyone is in the same place, mentally. Not everyone can be positive about their future or how things are for them now (thats called depression). I think its pretty wrong to BAN someone who is struggling... that defeats the whole object! If its a support forum then surely they should try and help the person to change their attitude, not just cast them aside.

Yes, its not helpful to always be negative... you need to be positive to progress, but you also need to talk when youre feeling low, to get things off your chest.

 

[Slothrop]

Are you posting this here because you want pity or because you want to learn to not be hurt by jerks?

 

[Doomed2Die]

Are you posting this here because you want pity or because you want to learn to not be hurt by jerks?

Lol.

One second... *ahem* the OP is clearly just looking for pity which I do believe is unmistakably grounds for a banning! Moderators if you please...

Honestly though, it does not seem like much of a self help forum.

What positive contributions did you make that would make our community better?

Awesome.

 

[philly2bits]

Thanks for telling us. I'm never going there

 

[BlueRose]

Are you posting this here because you want pity or because you want to learn to not be hurt by jerks?

Lol.

One second... *ahem* the OP is clearly just looking for pity which I do believe is unmistakably grounds for a banning! Moderators if you please...

Honestly though, it does not seem like much of a self help forum.

Awesome.

The reason I'm concerned about getting banned is that I'm aware of certain rules some forums have for Posting about other forums,threads or members. I'm not looking for a pity party, I just don't like being insulted by jerks like that person who sent me that paticular message..

 

[philly2bits]

If the mods don't like this thread they will probably just delete it. I don't think they would ban you.

 

[x000x]

It really sucks that they won't let you express yourself on that site. If people don't like your complaining they can just look at another thread. I'm sure I complain on here a lot. I makes me feel better when I tell people how I'm feeling, even if I'm just whining and complaining. I don't feel comfortable telling anybody I know in real life how I feel; I find it much easier to do on this site. If you ever want to just tell someone how your day is going or you feel like you really have to let something that's been on your mind loose, you can add me on MSN: [email protected].

 

[Nervous]

lol who the **** is Steve Pavlina?

 

[BlueRose]

lol who the **** is Steve Pavlina?

I know he's an @$$hle

 

[Remus]

I'm not sure about slagging off other sites on here being covered in the rules, we pulled a "external site"thread a while back as it caused a big hoohaa.

I've had a few digs about some sites but also reccomended others, was during a non-moderator period though.

To be banned from here you have to really be an arse, most bannings are very temporary anywho (cooling off period)

 

[cookie cutter]

i visited the pavlina web site a while back. steve and his wife have some sort of racket going imo, where they use concepts from alternative religions to teach people how to be successful, or something like that. at any rate it seemed totally fake to me. i wouldn't spend my time there anyway and this doesn't surprise me.

 

[BlueRose]

i visited the pavlina web site a while back. steve and his wife have some sort of racket going imo, where they use concepts from alternative religions to teach people how to be successful, or something like that. at any rate it seemed totally fake to me. i wouldn't spend my time there anyway and this doesn't surprise me.

IMO the Pavlina's are full of $"!+... They are very judgmental... People like them put me down. I wish there was a way of terminating their forum, unfortuanetly I don't have that kind of power. They say the forum is for people growing?, GIVE ME A F BREAK! From what I experienced on that forum the people there are growing impossible...

 

[acreepyperson]

..enough said?

 

[-hermit-]

All forums are different. There are two sides to every coin and you haven't provided us with the other side which was probably a thread about how much your life sucks or how you hate your self. What good does that do? It brings you down and every one else who reads it down with you. Your not at the stage where your ready to do some thing about your problems except whine about them which is why you were banned. That forum is about improvement for ones self not some where to moan about your life.

 

[-hermit-]

See this is probably why they banned you. I imagine you got upset because you didn't get the responses you wanted to your pity thread. You really need to calm down and learn to talk to people with out getting upset.