Daniel089
Well-known member
Hi all!
I'm gonna tell you the story of my social life, It won't be just a few sentences though. I am just curious of what others here think of me and what they may reply to me...
First off my age is 23 this summer.
I never really had friends, people that I can hang out with, even If I had some "buddies" when I was around 13. At high school I was like someone who doesn't even exist among my classmates, because I was too shy to start a conversation, and too unexperienced to get out of it without embarrasment, or me saying something completely stupid discouraging me to continue... I attended field trips, I even went on 3 parties with my classmates during the 4 years.
Now it's past 4 years since high school, I am studying in a technical university in Budapest, where I do know people, only guys, but we never speak of anything else than study stuff, but they don't seem to mind it at all... And in my life I can count the times on my 2 hands when I hanged out with people like in a bar or a club or so.
The city where I always lived in (Budapest) has 1,8 million people and I am really alone, it's quite odd isn't it?
I don't have confidence to hang out with people. I am dying to get friends, talk to girls, my wildest dream ever is to get a girlfriend and keep her happy.
It was a few weeks ago when things turned out bad. I began to be extremely jealous on human relationships, on people who love each other, who I see on the streets, they turn out to be some kind of enemies in my head, and when I see them I get angry, I feel attacked. I also think too much of these things, then I start shedding tears, because I think of my miserable life.
I was seriously thinking on going on cognitive therapies that might help me...
You may think I'm a fool, and why I just don't have the guts to start something on my own... The reason is: I'm probably more afraid of failure, than anything... And failures would happen a lot if I'd finally start my social life...
I'm gonna tell you the story of my social life, It won't be just a few sentences though. I am just curious of what others here think of me and what they may reply to me...
First off my age is 23 this summer.
I never really had friends, people that I can hang out with, even If I had some "buddies" when I was around 13. At high school I was like someone who doesn't even exist among my classmates, because I was too shy to start a conversation, and too unexperienced to get out of it without embarrasment, or me saying something completely stupid discouraging me to continue... I attended field trips, I even went on 3 parties with my classmates during the 4 years.
Now it's past 4 years since high school, I am studying in a technical university in Budapest, where I do know people, only guys, but we never speak of anything else than study stuff, but they don't seem to mind it at all... And in my life I can count the times on my 2 hands when I hanged out with people like in a bar or a club or so.
The city where I always lived in (Budapest) has 1,8 million people and I am really alone, it's quite odd isn't it?
I don't have confidence to hang out with people. I am dying to get friends, talk to girls, my wildest dream ever is to get a girlfriend and keep her happy.
It was a few weeks ago when things turned out bad. I began to be extremely jealous on human relationships, on people who love each other, who I see on the streets, they turn out to be some kind of enemies in my head, and when I see them I get angry, I feel attacked. I also think too much of these things, then I start shedding tears, because I think of my miserable life.
I was seriously thinking on going on cognitive therapies that might help me...
You may think I'm a fool, and why I just don't have the guts to start something on my own... The reason is: I'm probably more afraid of failure, than anything... And failures would happen a lot if I'd finally start my social life...
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