My job is making me depressed bc of the way I get treated there

[CrazyGirl]

Co-workers ignore me for the most part. As I watch other co-workers talk and exchange jokes with each other, I can't help feeling like an outcast. It has gotten to the point, Id start crying at work. People say I have to talk for them to talk to me. It doesn't work. It comes off one-sided with me doing the talking. I'm currently seeing a counselor. I tell myself to suck it up and just do my work until I leave. Its not working anymore. The job itself is stressful as it is and then the added stress of co-workers having their own little group of people to talk to makes it worse.

Finding another job is easier said than done. With my partial deafness, and lack of college education, I'm limited at what I can do. Yeah, I could go back to school but that costs money which I don't have and I suck big time at studying and memorizing.

I'm in a lot of debt which makes it worse so I feel like I can't quit my job and just put up with the way I get trerated

 

[DeadmanWalking]

Well, I don't a lot about the workplace, so I don't know if what I'm saying will help.

I think one thing you could do is to talk to a supervisor or something about how you feel; they might be able to do something to help. I assume you're already talking to your therapist, so I probably don't need to mention them. Another thing you could do, if you feel up to it, is to talk to everyone you see until you find someone who will respond. If all else fails, then bring something with you to work to preoccupy you, like music or something. I'm sorry that you have to go through this; I hope things get better for you.

 

[R3K]

i'd say just focus on de-stressing. figure out ways to make the job less stressful, or how to get through the inevitable stress as unscathed as possible. if your coworkers wanna make their little clique and exclude certain people so they can feel cool about themselves then let them. at my work we have random movie nights where we (try) to go see a movie every 3 months or so, and everyone's invited, even ppl who don't work there anymore... only ppl that don't get invited are those who have serious beef with each other.

 

[recluse]

I know how you feel. The thing about workplaces is that you tend to get clicks and they are not too welcoming to new comers. I never felt i was part of the workforce anywhere. The worst place i worked in was a factory where there seemed to be a lot of hostility towards me. Maybe i was paranoid but i felt that people were making fun of me.

 

[CrazyGirl]

I know how you feel. The thing about workplaces is that you tend to get clicks and they are not too welcoming to new comers. I never felt i was part of the workforce anywhere. The worst place i worked in was a factory where there seemed to be a lot of hostility towards me. Maybe i was paranoid but i felt that people were making fun of me.

been with the job over 10 yrs. never bothered me until just recently

 

[MikeyC]

I don't really have much advice except that I hope it all works out. It's not good when you're not enjoying your job for any reason.

 

[nafadda]

ok,this may sound harsh to you but it is just the facts.

first off,people at work do not have to talk and joke with anyone they don't want to..they may be friends outside work and just closer with one another...should they include you?? perhaps,but it's not mandatory.

i've worked places where people were friends outside work and i wasn't part of the gang,,no problem..i wasn't there for friendship.i was there to put my time in,do my work and get my paycheck.i made friends elsewhere.


as far as getting another job without a college education,,come on..now a days many people do not go to college and do just fine. also you can go back to a Votech type school on a pell grant and not have to pay back a penny of it..thats what it's there for.just google it.there are many classs you can take on line so you wouldn't even have to attend the classes at the local CC,and you will come out of it with the degree you want and no debt.besides,do you have any idea how many people that come out of college now a days that can not get jobs but still have all that money they have to pay back??

..so as harsh as you may think this sounds,if YOU really want to turn things around..you can ..but first you need to stop looking for excuses and thinking that everyone is going to have to pay attention and befriend you at work..life jusr doesn't work that way.

 

[KiaKaha]

I am sorry this is happening to you, it must be a very frustrating position to be in... being excluded never makes anyone feel good.

I have been there myself, and I think most people have at some point... its an underlying feeling that I constantly have with me. I think exclusion is closely related to a lack of empathy - and I sometimes wonder, would the same people who obviously exclude others from the group care if it was happening to them? I think inclusivity is very important for ones emotional well being....but truth is you cant make anyone like you, nor can you make people include you. Its unkind - but thats the way it is sometimes.

I think if your job is making you depressed you need to do something about it. Honestly I dont know enough about you or your situation to give any sound advice but perhaps try and look at things from an objective perspective and lay out exactly what you can do to move on from this job - so you can place yourself in a better environement. How that comes about - I cant answer that.

I would totally be your friend if I was there.... make jokes, complain about our boss, goof off etc...

 

[Richey]

been with the job over 10 yrs. never bothered me until just recently

How do you mean?

I would say that if it's only started to bother you now after ten years then you must be doing something right and i'd say you are normal and then some. Usually what you describe happens to me every day from when i start a job until i move to another. And the fact that you've been at your job for ten years is amazing, that is longevity at its finest.

But i can relate to what you say. There are usually cliques and i find its those who just always go out and party with groups that seem to be the same at work with others in the the same position.

A good way to handle it is to just be positive in your interactions with them. Laugh if you find something funny. Be as pleasant as you can. That's all anyone really expects.

 

[ddhamilt]

been with the job over 10 yrs. never bothered me until just recently

Are you saying that you never really connected with any workers in the last 10 years, and it didn't bother you, but now it has all of a sudden? Or did you used to talk to people and get along with them sometimes?