love or imagination?

[Kanon]

I am an idealist and a dreamer. I imagine the ultimate love is to be like one single person with my partner, and build something in our lives together, day by day.

i'm also an infp, and the idea of building a progressively stronger relationship seems to be what keeps me addicted to lala land. reading many of the posts in this forum, there seem to be a lot of "NF's" here.

 

[Nicholas]

i'm also an infp

LOL, you guessed right. I'm actually an INFP, as far as I know. And an HSP (did you take the short test in the test section? "Are you an HSP?" is the title).
I'm happy I found out more about myself though, because I was going to make too many mistakes in my life... Now at least I know myself a little more and know what I might want and what I definitely don't want.

 

[Kanon]

LOL, you guessed right. I'm actually an INFP, as far as I know. And an HSP (did you take the short test in the test section? "Are you an HSP?" is the title).
I'm happy I found out more about myself though, because I was going to make too many mistakes in my life... Now at least I know myself a little more and know what I might want and what I definitely don't want.

yes i am. that was actually how i started getting into discovering my personality type, etc. awhile back, i was taking a psychology class and in the margins of a self-analysis assignment that i turned in, the instructor recommended the book, The Highly Sensitive Person, to me. reading through it, just about all of the characteristics were spot on. It has also help me understand a little more of why i certain situations and places overstimulate me... the only downside is that its hard to explain this anyone in that situation that cannot relate.

 

[Nicholas]

The Highly Sensitive Person, to me. reading through it, just about all of the characteristics were spot on. It has also help me understand a little more of why i certain situations and places overstimulate me...

I have that book too, but I haven't read the last part yet. I was amazed, because it seemed like it was written by someone who knew already. I I also have the workbook, but I still have to take a look at it... I don't know if it'll be helpful though. Knowing about HSPs has helped me a lot, now I feel I know myself much better. I still don't know what to do in my life and how to cope with this high sensitivity, but I am going to find that out soon I hope.

 

[Kanon]

I have that book too, but I haven't read the last part yet. I was amazed, because it seemed like it was written by someone who knew already. I I also have the workbook, but I still have to take a look at it... I don't know if it'll be helpful though. Knowing about HSPs has helped me a lot, now I feel I know myself much better. I still don't know what to do in my life and how to cope with this high sensitivity, but I am going to find that out soon I hope.

The best method is to expose yourself to more stimulating situations as you get used to lower level stimulating situations. the conclusion that i've come to for the time being is that there is no guaranteed that you will not be overstimulated in a situation even with lots of practice. if you start on the workbook, please post on how you are progressing.

 

[Darker Than Black]

screw fantasy man, I'm gonna focus on grades

 

[Flowers-Of-Bloom]

Also, if you've been in a relationship, was it better than your fantasy world?

Well, the fact that it was real... Yeah. It was an interesting experience... But in real-life relationships, you're vulnerable. If it's fantasy then it's so controlled and safe.
To answer your question... Yes and no. 'No' for the reason that I just explained and 'yes' because it was infact much more enjoyable than I had expected... for the while it lasted. But it wasn't worth the break up.

I don't see the point of relationships anymore, fantasy or not. It seems like the world is obsessed with dating and sex... because it is...

 

[Kanon]

Well, the fact that it was real... Yeah. It was an interesting experience... But in real-life relationships, you're vulnerable. If it's fantasy then it's so controlled and safe.
To answer your question... Yes and no. 'No' for the reason that I just explained and 'yes' because it was infact much more enjoyable than I had expected... for the while it lasted. But it wasn't worth the break up.

I don't see the point of relationships anymore, fantasy or not. It seems like the world is obsessed with dating and sex... because it is...

i understand what you mean. the purpose of love relationships have become very distant from their original meaning: a meaningful connection between two people filled with passion, intimacy, and commitment. sex eventually becomes a part of a meaningful relationship, but there are people that enter a relationship only for sexual pleasure and/or passion which just distorts everything. what is a relationship where people do not share their real inner feelings and thoughts with each other? what is a relationship where people are not loyal and willing to at least work through difficulties?
you are very right about the world's obsession with dating and sex. unfortunately, there are many examples of relationships that do not strive to fulfill all three criteria for a good connection.

 

[AimeeSP]

i always imagined being with a guy, just holding hands, cuddling while falling asleep, being able to tell him absolutely anything & not being afraid that he would judge me or hurt me in any way. i imagined being completely comfortable & myself around him, wanting to go to him when im feeling down, instead of going home & sitting in my room. i imagine myself seeing his faults, but accepting them, & loving them, & him doing the same for me.

Perfect. You've just described exactly what i imagine.

Shame Disney gave me unrealistic expectations about love.

 

[Amherstclane]

Hello Friends.
Not Explainable it . . . . . .

Thanks.

 

[Nicholas]

what is a relationship where people do not share their real inner feelings and thoughts with each other? what is a relationship where people are not loyal and willing to at least work through difficulties?
you are very right about the world's obsession with dating and sex. unfortunately, there are many examples of relationships that do not strive to fulfill all three criteria for a good connection.

The thing is, it seems no one nowadays feels like doing anything together anymore, to improve together. It seems everyone nowadays wants to have the best right away, society puts too much pressure on us, it moves on and changes too fast.
So there's only a few idealists like us left. The others are in a hurry and "consume" relationships: if you're not ok, they can get rid of you very fast and find someone better, because they don't feel like losing time to build something special together.

 

[Catuk]

Just trying to talk to a woman I like is what I fantasize about. Coming from a 29 year old little boy. ::

 

[da_illest101]

Just trying to talk to a woman I like is what I fantasize about. Coming from a 29 year old little boy. ::

you should try dating site, that's what i do, though be honest about how you are, it might turn alot of them away but u'll be left with the ones that would actually make a difference in ur life