Interviews
- Thread starter knr9311
- Start date
RingsOfSaturn
New member
I have the same problem.
I get so anxious that I either clam up or I try to push passed the anxiety and that just leads to this whole waterfall of words that comes out too fast for me to filter. It used to be a lot crappier though, because I used to have this uncontrollable laughing thing with it--I mean, the guy would say something that was only a little funny and I'd start laughing and I couldn't stop until I was red in the face and gasping for breath.
...And then when I finally stopped, I'd go back to talking way too much again and I'd leave feeling half-embarrassed and half-horrible for the person for having to had to deal with it.
I get so anxious that I either clam up or I try to push passed the anxiety and that just leads to this whole waterfall of words that comes out too fast for me to filter. It used to be a lot crappier though, because I used to have this uncontrollable laughing thing with it--I mean, the guy would say something that was only a little funny and I'd start laughing and I couldn't stop until I was red in the face and gasping for breath.
...And then when I finally stopped, I'd go back to talking way too much again and I'd leave feeling half-embarrassed and half-horrible for the person for having to had to deal with it.
awkwardamanda
Well-known member
When I moused over the link and saw the words "mouth diarrhea," I had no idea you meant, literally. o_0
mikebird
Banned
Strange days
Important to get out. Sick of pending telephone interviews, getting notes prepared, ignoring food; waiting after an arranged time to call!! After 30 mins waiting for the caller makes it hard to consider it worthy
Yesterday a real office to visit -30 minute walk is so perfect for me. Suit on. Up & go. Bad mistake and I'm sure I'll be ruled out. I get big bugs with recruiters who can't spell or punctuate. I had a appointment from the recruiter 3:30 to be there
OK, I'm a strict, precise ordinator of facts and timestamps. I put 1330 in my calendar. See the error! I turned up at reception, from wintry winds which I love for refreshment. Reception got hectic, thinking I was a freak. No surprise there. The main contact man on the phone said come back at 1500. Offered coffee, but I popped home. On the way there first time, there were mormons wanting my attention on a corner. I said 'no'. OK and walked away.
On my way home to relax, the mormons stopped me again. I had the office visitor's pass in my hand, wearing my brown suit, in a rush, excited about getting back there. They had my attention for a while. I warned them immediately that I would now talk about myself with mouth diarrhoea, and it's tough to stop me. I always try to stop, but I go on for hours if anyone will listen. They talked about Jesus & Love, etc. I didn't mind but they kept listening too long.
Went back later; winds, snow and cold didn't knock me, but I hate others' stares at me. I think a suit makes me very prone, subject to mocking. No idea if that's right or if I'm imaging it.
Interview OK. I hoped it'd show my determination in suffering my own timewasting.. 40 min interview was a lot shorter than my usual 1 - 2 hours. I think I was bustled out with their obvious giggles about a person who doesn't turn up right. Where's the tolerance threshold? I walked back home with kids going home after school. Three little girls were running around me, dancing, smiling, laughing, shouting 'hey Sir!!' In my suit. 'He doesn't speak - he doesn't want to speak to us'... Safe home and warm. Maybe my parents didn't like me cos grandparents don't like the little ones. Now there's no time for me to sprout any new life. I took on the same kind of kid dislike of my parents. Life goes around
Tomorrow is another interview to drive 34 miles and back
Today, bombarded with dozens of intruding calls again. All logged as people up north; I can't get their 'reason for calling' out of them. They always ask for a person called Kathleen I've never known. My home. My landline. Every day they ask for her again. Maybe it's spelt Cathlene, or Kathy. They won't say. Just a mumbly voice. That's what people are to me.
I had a preposterous rant, which does happen with any random caller. I screamed at the limit of my voice. Maybe good exercise for the vocal chords? All the expletives I could think of, with the mic as far down the throat as I can. I am proud to sum it up that briefly. Does anyone else get riled that way? It is disturbing for me, 12 years alone, when no 10 minutes ever goes by without a call on both lines. I assume psychologists in training get to follow their list of animated subjects we have found for you to practice with. The calls are the worst form of bullying. I yearn to reach out and floor these people and beat them until they stop breathing and close heir eyes and shut up. I wondered what neighbours make of me.
I am pure mouth diarrhoea. Of course, silent around strangers. There's such an impossible balance to obtain. The only subject I can think about is me. You've noticed. There is nobody else to speak to. Nobody to listen to. Everyone walks away from me.
I took 10 mins to go the the police to speak to. I knew it was futile. I was at the desk and all their customers were waiting, staring at me. The big fat bloke had nothing to say. Just change your phone number, or don't answer. Yep. The usual magic solution everyone has for me. Yeah... so so so soooo simple. My phone identity is my route to something. 12 years of wondering. I came to a conclusion to keep it, fending spastics. Hmmm I seem to have the almighty power of years of immediate 1-button hangups. Every action can lead to a loss. Answer; anything can happen. Everything will go bad. Exactly the same as interviews.
I'll be up till 2am getting my notes prepared for interview. Sleep'd be nice.
Suit takes me a long time to put on. About 10 minutes per shirt button, about 5 hours deciding if I get the magic ability to do the top button, or give up and try the tie without the top button. That takes 3 hours to get the tie right.
Getting home, it comes off in three seconds. I can forget the interview
Anyway - what I have at present is too many interviews lined up. Level of concentration on too many things. I'm used to it. I can cope, but tuning into one at a time when my thoughts are about several upcoming prospective employers. Anyone get that trouble?
People like horses. They don't speak much
Important to get out. Sick of pending telephone interviews, getting notes prepared, ignoring food; waiting after an arranged time to call!! After 30 mins waiting for the caller makes it hard to consider it worthy
Yesterday a real office to visit -30 minute walk is so perfect for me. Suit on. Up & go. Bad mistake and I'm sure I'll be ruled out. I get big bugs with recruiters who can't spell or punctuate. I had a appointment from the recruiter 3:30 to be there
OK, I'm a strict, precise ordinator of facts and timestamps. I put 1330 in my calendar. See the error! I turned up at reception, from wintry winds which I love for refreshment. Reception got hectic, thinking I was a freak. No surprise there. The main contact man on the phone said come back at 1500. Offered coffee, but I popped home. On the way there first time, there were mormons wanting my attention on a corner. I said 'no'. OK and walked away.
On my way home to relax, the mormons stopped me again. I had the office visitor's pass in my hand, wearing my brown suit, in a rush, excited about getting back there. They had my attention for a while. I warned them immediately that I would now talk about myself with mouth diarrhoea, and it's tough to stop me. I always try to stop, but I go on for hours if anyone will listen. They talked about Jesus & Love, etc. I didn't mind but they kept listening too long.
Went back later; winds, snow and cold didn't knock me, but I hate others' stares at me. I think a suit makes me very prone, subject to mocking. No idea if that's right or if I'm imaging it.
Interview OK. I hoped it'd show my determination in suffering my own timewasting.. 40 min interview was a lot shorter than my usual 1 - 2 hours. I think I was bustled out with their obvious giggles about a person who doesn't turn up right. Where's the tolerance threshold? I walked back home with kids going home after school. Three little girls were running around me, dancing, smiling, laughing, shouting 'hey Sir!!' In my suit. 'He doesn't speak - he doesn't want to speak to us'... Safe home and warm. Maybe my parents didn't like me cos grandparents don't like the little ones. Now there's no time for me to sprout any new life. I took on the same kind of kid dislike of my parents. Life goes around
Tomorrow is another interview to drive 34 miles and back
Today, bombarded with dozens of intruding calls again. All logged as people up north; I can't get their 'reason for calling' out of them. They always ask for a person called Kathleen I've never known. My home. My landline. Every day they ask for her again. Maybe it's spelt Cathlene, or Kathy. They won't say. Just a mumbly voice. That's what people are to me.
I had a preposterous rant, which does happen with any random caller. I screamed at the limit of my voice. Maybe good exercise for the vocal chords? All the expletives I could think of, with the mic as far down the throat as I can. I am proud to sum it up that briefly. Does anyone else get riled that way? It is disturbing for me, 12 years alone, when no 10 minutes ever goes by without a call on both lines. I assume psychologists in training get to follow their list of animated subjects we have found for you to practice with. The calls are the worst form of bullying. I yearn to reach out and floor these people and beat them until they stop breathing and close heir eyes and shut up. I wondered what neighbours make of me.
I am pure mouth diarrhoea. Of course, silent around strangers. There's such an impossible balance to obtain. The only subject I can think about is me. You've noticed. There is nobody else to speak to. Nobody to listen to. Everyone walks away from me.
I took 10 mins to go the the police to speak to. I knew it was futile. I was at the desk and all their customers were waiting, staring at me. The big fat bloke had nothing to say. Just change your phone number, or don't answer. Yep. The usual magic solution everyone has for me. Yeah... so so so soooo simple. My phone identity is my route to something. 12 years of wondering. I came to a conclusion to keep it, fending spastics. Hmmm I seem to have the almighty power of years of immediate 1-button hangups. Every action can lead to a loss. Answer; anything can happen. Everything will go bad. Exactly the same as interviews.
I'll be up till 2am getting my notes prepared for interview. Sleep'd be nice.
Suit takes me a long time to put on. About 10 minutes per shirt button, about 5 hours deciding if I get the magic ability to do the top button, or give up and try the tie without the top button. That takes 3 hours to get the tie right.
Getting home, it comes off in three seconds. I can forget the interview
Anyway - what I have at present is too many interviews lined up. Level of concentration on too many things. I'm used to it. I can cope, but tuning into one at a time when my thoughts are about several upcoming prospective employers. Anyone get that trouble?
People like horses. They don't speak much
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mikebird
Banned
Thing is: it's about selling yourself. Publishing yourself. I regret that too many ppl have my number and email
There's an ultimate pinnacle of life to not say toooo much. Gotta say a bit.
I keep trying different ends of the scale, but adopting a zip-up attitude doesn't really help, often ending in outbursts. I do have character, but it's too much or too quiet for most
Humour is what we need, to fit in, with the very best of the best.
mikebird
Banned
So I'll be interviewing on Valentine's Day
What will happen?
They will ask if I'm married. Shall I lie?
When was your last girlfriend?
It was why I became a person who became unworthy of employment
Starting in 2001, with our own home, they asked me, one day... how is ... she...?
I said 'there is nobody now' I talked at length about a particular girl whose name they knew I had been absorbed in for the last 4.5 years. They (HR) sensed when it was wrong. I was her first bloke. She was my third girl.
I am very surprised that, after all of my 246 interviews so far, since that day I lost her, nobody ever asks about anything social. No partners at all. I hope it is like that tomorrow, but surely a definitive way to find that magic employee. Big privileged family. Yes. A prince, princess..? With several island homes across the world.
Single. No partner? It'll be the simple reason why not to hire me. 50 other people to see. They'll all say 'yeah!!' no problem!
What will happen?
They will ask if I'm married. Shall I lie?
When was your last girlfriend?
It was why I became a person who became unworthy of employment
Starting in 2001, with our own home, they asked me, one day... how is ... she...?
I said 'there is nobody now' I talked at length about a particular girl whose name they knew I had been absorbed in for the last 4.5 years. They (HR) sensed when it was wrong. I was her first bloke. She was my third girl.
I am very surprised that, after all of my 246 interviews so far, since that day I lost her, nobody ever asks about anything social. No partners at all. I hope it is like that tomorrow, but surely a definitive way to find that magic employee. Big privileged family. Yes. A prince, princess..? With several island homes across the world.
Single. No partner? It'll be the simple reason why not to hire me. 50 other people to see. They'll all say 'yeah!!' no problem!
Interviews, yuck. I've been through quite a few, and most did not turn out well. I'm more in the "doesn't talk enough" category, it's horrible. And I've gotten to where I don't even attempt to apply for jobs, not only do I dread the interviews where they ask questions I can never find an answer to (when have I resolved conflict in a team setting, how did I handle a bad situation, etc), I can't even fill out applications because I can't think of anyone to put down under references, and I know they'll check my credit, which is in the crapper. I graduated with a masters degree almost four years ago, but I'm stuck in my two low wage jobs because I fear the whole process of finding new employment, it's kind of embarrassing, because I could/should be earning so much more than I am now. Add a bad economy to the mix, and I just feel completely hopeless, like searching isn't even worth the effort.
cocorose
Well-known member
Thanks for sharing your stories, everyone!
Just so you guys know, I got the job! I guess I wasn't as bad as I thought. You guys probably are better than you think, too!
Congratulations
awkwardamanda
Well-known member
Are they allowed to ask you that? I don't know what the laws are like where you are, but in Canada, they can't ask personal questions like that.
Sounds just like me. I finished university (bachelor's) three and a half years ago. I dreaded finding a new job. I was afraid to look. I'm totally embarrassed about not having something better yet. I was caught in a vicious cycle of being depressed about not having a full-time job, and not being able to look for a job because I was depressed. I kept working part-time (usually close to full-time) in a department store and felt stuck. I was drained and just did not have the time to really look. Of course, anytime I did, all I found were ads looking for people with experience and I just got discouraged. I had no idea what to do about references. I never really knew what the protocol was. I knew my supervisors liked me but it's not easy to ask your employer, "I've got an interview coming up. Could you give me a reference?" I had a summer job once as a receptionist, but I neglected to ask anyone if they'd give me a reference in the future because I was too shy. If I had done that, I may have found a job a long time ago. My store closed up in the fall. I was relieved when I got the news because I knew that would finally force me to look for a new job. I figured if I didn't find something else before the store closed, then at least I'd have the time to focus on job hunting. I asked two supervisors to give me reference so that helps. Now I spend a few hours almost everyday online, sifting through job ads and preparing applications. I understand that phrase, "Finding a job is a full-time job in itself." There aren't a lot of jobs to apply for. All I want is some sort of entry-level office job and most of the time, they want someone with experience, to do things that could easily be taught. When I do apply for something, I don't expect much. I just hope it doesn't take too much longer because this is exhausting. And at this point I'm concerned that employers might look at my resume and jump to conclusions about why I graduated in '09 and don't have anything listed besides retail since then. I worry they might judge me, and assume there must be some reason no one has hired me yet. And if I go for an interview and I get asked about that, I'm going to have to figure out how to address the issue without seeming lazy.:sad:
theslowesthand
Banned
What about muting/disconnecting phone at certain times each day (ie for a "break" from it). You probably can't go the whole hog & keep it muted 24/7 like i do
, as you get interviewers calling.But it will help you to keep your sanity! :bigsmile:. I mean, it is very clear you have some pretty major rage under the surface, and the phone ringing all the time, often with unknown callers (are they dialing wrong number??), constantly disrupting what your doing. You have more than enough frustrations with all those seeminly-pointless interviews you keep going to, & your cerbral-palsy, & all the people-crap you get all the time.
You know, try to be a bit easier/nicer to yourself, look after your needs, live more for the now...
Yes, exactly. I don't even know who or how to ask to give me a reference, and whenever I do look for jobs in my career field the ads all say minimum 3 years experience or experience with this or that software required. It's very frustrating, I've pretty much given up. Whenever I do muster up the energy/focus to sift through ads, I never hear anything back, or I get an email saying "thank you for your interest, but... I haven't had an interview since shortly after I graduated, in 2009.
mikebird
Banned
Quite enjoyed it today. Nice 125.5 mile journey round and back.
Silent on the way. Focussing on me and what I'll say. I was so pleased to put on my suit, smelling nice, and able to completely hide the open collar
Spent so many days researching the company and preparing notes for discussion.
Sat in a tiny room looking through the window with people talking - must have been another candidate. Don't mind waiting. Plenty of time. Relaxing. Great to be on the road for a while. There was nobody else when they let me in. They must have been laughing am before, because the recruiter told them I was useless. Just get him to visit and you'll see what I meant - they all learnt from me. That's my take on it.
Haven't eaten today
I wanted to start with an introduction and smile, glad to see it.
The opened the door and let me in. There was no Sandra (financial boss) I was expecting. I Never entered with such a cold glare from anyone. They just wanted to get rid of me. Where was my 2h 30min test I expected? I was ready. Simple. I got a grind about 'what's this?' 'what did you do?' on the CV. A bit like bullying, but I see it as asking an experienced expert how to do something really simple. My question to them was: "is my mouth not working?" (pointing at my lips)? They said 'yeah - it's fine, but...' They said we couldn't communicate. That's right. We are different. I talked all over them
I was there to help. They invited me there. No test. How can people just look at me and push me out? I felt proud and confident. They struggled to explain what was wrong. I said I could see the problem within being with you for 1 second. It was obvious. I've learned over the years. They erupt in some awe: (it's an alien!!!!!!) :crying:
I flared up. I could see it immediately. I was laughing at them. They went to fetch Sandra. She came in and started complaining. They pushed me out of the door. They told me to speak to Security on the way out. The guy was fine in the way through the car park before. I drove out. He came to meet me. I asked what they said to me. He said 'they didn't say anything. You know the way out, don't you? There are the barriers.'
I feel like a teacher to these people. I must be wrong. Dunno. I can articulate. Yu can't see it reading this. I was there with an in flamed fury. People ummm.. don't like it. It's part humour, part monster. I really do feel like grabbing an emergency axe out of a piece of glass, and wielding it at them. It's just in my head. People cowering.
It's the barrier to employment. This is real. I've had enough
The place was very derelict. Not what I expecting from the website. Rough. Middle of nowhere. Not the Central London quality I'm used to. There were a lot of people rushing through the doors and slamming them through my waiting room.
As I type, I've decided to remove my mugshot from my CV. Got the idea from another candidate a month ago.
I've had this giving-up response as I walk through the door for years. It's the first impression that seems to matter. One word out of my mouth or a smile seems to seal my fate. I start by praising the company or showing my interest and what I can do for you, which is standard for all others ask me.
It's experience. Doesn't apply to the next situation.
I cannot see anything different from meeting the next girlfriend. They want something. It's impossible to know what that is.
Recruiters all win, by oppressing professionals, earning their commission. Here's a typical example of recruiter foolishness and lack of sublevel micromind capabilty. Publishing an official job title. It is extremely rare to see any paragraph published containing no mistakes. Of course we have to compromise and ignore all errors:
Junior Business Analsyt
Silent on the way. Focussing on me and what I'll say. I was so pleased to put on my suit, smelling nice, and able to completely hide the open collar
Spent so many days researching the company and preparing notes for discussion.
Sat in a tiny room looking through the window with people talking - must have been another candidate. Don't mind waiting. Plenty of time. Relaxing. Great to be on the road for a while. There was nobody else when they let me in. They must have been laughing am before, because the recruiter told them I was useless. Just get him to visit and you'll see what I meant - they all learnt from me. That's my take on it.
Haven't eaten today
I wanted to start with an introduction and smile, glad to see it.
The opened the door and let me in. There was no Sandra (financial boss) I was expecting. I Never entered with such a cold glare from anyone. They just wanted to get rid of me. Where was my 2h 30min test I expected? I was ready. Simple. I got a grind about 'what's this?' 'what did you do?' on the CV. A bit like bullying, but I see it as asking an experienced expert how to do something really simple. My question to them was: "is my mouth not working?" (pointing at my lips)? They said 'yeah - it's fine, but...' They said we couldn't communicate. That's right. We are different. I talked all over them
I was there to help. They invited me there. No test. How can people just look at me and push me out? I felt proud and confident. They struggled to explain what was wrong. I said I could see the problem within being with you for 1 second. It was obvious. I've learned over the years. They erupt in some awe: (it's an alien!!!!!!) :crying:
I flared up. I could see it immediately. I was laughing at them. They went to fetch Sandra. She came in and started complaining. They pushed me out of the door. They told me to speak to Security on the way out. The guy was fine in the way through the car park before. I drove out. He came to meet me. I asked what they said to me. He said 'they didn't say anything. You know the way out, don't you? There are the barriers.'
I feel like a teacher to these people. I must be wrong. Dunno. I can articulate. Yu can't see it reading this. I was there with an in flamed fury. People ummm.. don't like it. It's part humour, part monster. I really do feel like grabbing an emergency axe out of a piece of glass, and wielding it at them. It's just in my head. People cowering.
It's the barrier to employment. This is real. I've had enough
The place was very derelict. Not what I expecting from the website. Rough. Middle of nowhere. Not the Central London quality I'm used to. There were a lot of people rushing through the doors and slamming them through my waiting room.
As I type, I've decided to remove my mugshot from my CV. Got the idea from another candidate a month ago.
I've had this giving-up response as I walk through the door for years. It's the first impression that seems to matter. One word out of my mouth or a smile seems to seal my fate. I start by praising the company or showing my interest and what I can do for you, which is standard for all others ask me.
It's experience. Doesn't apply to the next situation.
I cannot see anything different from meeting the next girlfriend. They want something. It's impossible to know what that is.
Recruiters all win, by oppressing professionals, earning their commission. Here's a typical example of recruiter foolishness and lack of sublevel micromind capabilty. Publishing an official job title. It is extremely rare to see any paragraph published containing no mistakes. Of course we have to compromise and ignore all errors:
Junior Business Analsyt
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awkwardamanda
Well-known member
I'm noticing a lot of ads for supposedly "entry-level" jobs that say they want at least a year of experience, or 7 months to a year, or 1-2 years. Sometimes I'll apply anyway, but I know I don't have much of a chance. Even if the ad says, "no experience required," or "will train," there is likely to be someone who has done it before. Sometimes the ad will say, "experience an asset," but the reality is that experience is always an asset, whether they say so or not. It just really bugs me when the job duties include things like filing, data entry, distributing mail, and other simple things like that, and they still want experience. I get that some jobs would be difficult to learn with no experience, but sometimes I think employers are just too lazy to train someone to do straightforward clerical duties.
I've been spending a lot of time lately scouring the internet for advice on job searching/resume writing/interviews/etc. If you haven't done the same, I recommend it.
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mikebird
Banned
Yep!!
I keep trying. I have. Family tell me. Psychologists keep saying I go off-topic. OK. I put relentless effort into zipping up. This last episode was a cornerstone of my next plan. I predict what will happen - probably the same as ever. I really will try. I feel that I am the one testing the interviewer, from my perspective, including phone calls.
I will. I can. Actually, silence on a phone call, waiting for them to speak does not work at all. I say 'I'm all ears. Waiting for you...' They hangup, of course.
Yeah. Any rapper should go centre stage, cut the mic cord and look at the audience, looking left & right
I WILL try silence next time, pretending that I don't exist. I suspect they might see me as an alien. I expect that within 1 minute, or 30 mins or 1 hour of curbing my lips and sealing them tight might result in my vocal chords and hand slaps right in their ear, or face. If anyone does that to me, I relax and appreciate their expressiveness when there's no violence. I'd smile, blink my eyes, shake their hand and praise them. I like drama. I like to expand on 'uhh.. hello'
The people I have to deal with are just not ready for the world. They'd retreat into their shell; their child perspective in an office, bubble-wrap & cottonwoolled luxury
They seem to react to my direct stare and maintained eye contact + frown as I listen
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mikebird
Banned
Are we meant to take our partner into an interview? Is it standard, for proof of being society,to get a job? Never thought of it. Maybe that's why I don't get much work to do since 2001. My neurologist was surprised I went into the annual clinic without anyone else. Repeated questions: is it you, nobody else? Just yourself?
When not married, what are you supposed to do, when you don't have a wife? Is this the answer to life? I've been searching for a clearer reason for failure. I'm not doing anything wrong? I don't kill people. I'm not stupid or lazy. Why no work?
When not married, what are you supposed to do, when you don't have a wife? Is this the answer to life? I've been searching for a clearer reason for failure. I'm not doing anything wrong? I don't kill people. I'm not stupid or lazy. Why no work?
Plan9
Active member
My problem with interviews is I don't want to talk about myself. I just want to deal in objective facts: I have these qualifications, this experience, these skills, this level of understanding, if you don't like it find some one els.
That said I did once talk about a flat mate picking skin off his girl friend's feet and I got the job. After that I had no idea how this stuff works...
That said I did once talk about a flat mate picking skin off his girl friend's feet and I got the job. After that I had no idea how this stuff works...