I'm such an idiot

emre43

Well-known member
I started another thread a few days ago about how naive I am about stepping up to the wider world.

I am going to come across as a complete idiot whilst people are reading through this but here it goes. In late July I pre-ordered an item that is due out in November. Through previous experiences of pre-ordering items I have always paid at the date of dispatch, however, this time the money was removed four months in advance. Because of the fact that I had never previously paid in advance when pre-ordering items I went ahead with the order despite not having enough money in my account to do so at the time. I would have by November. Unbeknownst to me the money had been taken out and led to me becoming overdrawn. As I didn't know that I had overdrawn I continued to spend. When I found out a few days later that I was overdrawn I immediately took £130 out of my savings account (that I had been saving since I was a little boy for my university fees) to rebalance the books.

I am so naive it is almost unbelievable. I know absolutely nothing about banking and two days ago I looked at my latest statement to find that I had received six separate withdrawals of £25 from my bank account. Assuming it was some error I contacted PayPal asking them to explain what was happening. They told me to contact my bank and they can "teach me how to read a bank statement" (which I found a little bit rude). In my naivety I told them that I "know full well how to read a bank statement" but they insisted that I do that so I agreed. I phoned my bank and they told me that the charges to my account were overdraft fees (probably thinking that I am an idiot for not knowing this; I am sure that anybody else would have known this off of the top of their heads but I had no idea). I then had to switch another £150 of my student savings over to again take me out of the red.

I phoned these people up acting like I knew better than them when in fact I am just a naive little boy who isn't ready for the big world yet. I feel like such a clown... ::(:
 

Agent_Violet

Well-known member
awww honey that stuff can happen to anyone! honestly! I had overdrafts on my bank acct by accident every now and then til i was at least 24. it happens sometimes.

typically reserving something means they charge your account when it ships, not when you reserve it unless they're collecting a small portion of the price to place the pre-order. I can see how you wouldn't know they were going to just charge you right up front bc that's not normally how it works.

As far as bank overdrafts, usually,playing naive will make them refund the overdraft fees to you especially if you've never been overdrawn before.

I recommend that you check your bank balance daily or keep a written record of what you're spending to subtract from what you've got available to you.

You're not a clown.
 

coyote

Well-known member
financial institutions purposefully make things complicated in order to take advantage of people who don't spend all their free time counting their money and pouring over their bank statements

but yeah - the worst part of getting overdrawn are the fees - a small overdraft can multiply exponentially in a matter of days

it's happened to me more times than i care to think

apparently i haven't learned my lesson
 

Greenthorn

Member
I pre-order things all the time online, though I've always been careful to read through the sites payment policy before ordering just in case they require immediate payment beforehand ::eek:: try not to be so hard on yourself, mistakes happen, and I too am a noob when it comes to banking. I personally think it's the banks fault, they take so f*ckin long to update your online statement it takes about a week before you know any moneys been taken out! But hey, at least you had the guts to ring the bastards up and give em a piece of your mind! I know I wouldn't be able to do it...
 

coyote

Well-known member
....I once went over my overdraft and had my card declined right at checkout at a big food shop. It was over £50 and all bagged up then card declined. Now that was hard to deal with bcos of the anxiety and loads of people waiting in line and having to walk away completely empty handed....

oh yeah - i've had that happen enough times that now i hold my breath every time i use my bank card, waiting for the "Approved" message to appear - even if I know there's enough money there
 

Rembrandt Broam

Well-known member
Don't beat yourself up over it. It's easily done.

Once I received my CC statement and spotted a payment I didn't recognise. I was all set to call the card company and complain that this was a fraudulent transaction, and that I wasn't paying it, when I realised that it was in fact something I had charged to the CC, but the name of the company on the statement was different to the name they traded under. I'd have felt a total idiot if I'd got the card company to retract the payment only to realise my mistake afterwards. :rolleyes:
 

Rembrandt Broam

Well-known member
Originally Posted by coyote

oh yeah - i've had that happen enough times that now i hold my breath every time i use my bank card, waiting for the "Approved" message to appear - even if I know there's enough money there
haha yep its always at the back of my mind.

There's an easy way to deal with that. Just wave your hand in front of the person behind the counter and say authoritatively "This card is approved. You don't need to refuse this transaction." They should get a sort of glazed look in their eyes and repeat the phrases back in agreement, and you're good to go. :)
 

emre43

Well-known member
Thanks for your comments guys, they've made me feel better. I suppose why this affects me so much is because I feel confident enough to speak to people now and emerge from my shell. But I keep coming across things like this that tell me that I'm not ready.
 

lilmutegirl

Well-known member
Don't feel like an idiot. Everyone makes mistakes. My bank specific states when they charge an overdraft fee, but it sounds like your statement wasn't very straightforward.

I am very impressed that you were able to get up the nerve to call the company, so kudos to you for that!:D I would have just covered the money needed in the account and not say anything.

It was rude of them to imply that you didn't know how to read the statement. That seems like very poor customer service, in my opinion.
 

lilmutegirl

Well-known member
And, I always feel like I'm not ready for anything, but, really, you won't be prepared to deal with stuff or gain knowlege without the experience, so avoiding it is a sure way to never "be ready". I should take my own advise, but I know it is easier said than done.
 

emre43

Well-known member
And, I always feel like I'm not ready for anything, but, really, you won't be prepared to deal with stuff or gain knowlege without the experience, so avoiding it is a sure way to never "be ready". I should take my own advise, but I know it is easier said than done.

That's exactly what I have been telling myself for the last six months or so. I can give up and feel sorry for myself or I can try and I have been trying. I don't like doing things like this one bit but at least I can say that I tried.
 

Waybuloo

Well-known member
Before I was old enough to goto uni, I didn't even know there's an overdraft fee. It's an unscrupulous thing anyways, and often people in your situation get unwittingly charged when they don't have bad spending habits, at times due to some stupid technicality. See when you get paid, the money doesn't reflect in your account until it has been cleared after a few days. However when you are charged the money comes out straight away. Welcome to the big world, where big business rule how you live.

When I am spending/earning, I check my online statement with internet banking daily, so I have no surprises. I even keep spreadsheets of refunds due my way and various expenses so I know my position even if the statements are behind. When I order things online, I always assume they take the money straight away, and that's how it's been most of the time. It's not right but they do it anyways. Sometimes they don't have the stock but my money's been sitting in their account for a month before I can get it back.

It's not idiotic to not know about over draft fees, after all, if you have been prudent and a conservative spender, you had no reason to run into them in the past. Anyways, lodge a complaint about any customer service person who was rude and condescending towards you.
 

emre43

Well-known member
When I order things online, I always assume they take the money straight away, and that's how it's been most of the time. It's not right but they do it anyways. Sometimes they don't have the stock but my money's been sitting in their account for a month before I can get it back.

Really? I do pre-order quite a bit online and this is the first time I have ever come across this happening. Maybe it's just the places that I shop...

Anyways, lodge a complaint about any customer service person who was rude and condescending towards you.

I might just do this actually, except I forgot to ask for her name. ::eek::
 

Waybuloo

Well-known member
Really? I do pre-order quite a bit online and this is the first time I have ever come across this happening. Maybe it's just the places that I shop...



I might just do this actually, except I forgot to ask for her name. ::eek::

Yeah I like to complain so that someone gets their just desserts :) If you remember the time of your call, and maybe give a description of their voice that might help to identify. Well you can remember to ask a name for next time. I have gotton quite good responses by complaining, but I always do it politely without forfeiting any of my consumer rights.

Sometimes I buy things but their stock levels online weren't up to date so it was effectively re-ordering. I have come across some appalling customer service in terms of ordering, stock, delivery etc, so always expect the worst and be surprised when it goes above expectations. There's some good ones too. I try to do a review search on google before hand or just do a judgement based on their presentation, professionalism, amount of information given etc. Everything is a learning process.
 

emre43

Well-known member
I have just filed a complaint with them. And I await their response. I am not very good with words so I hope that my email is understood. I would really appreciate if you could give your opinions on where I went wrong or did well so that I know for future reference. I don't expect anybody to do this for me because it is your own time but here it is:

Dear sir or madam,

I yesterday morning phoned PayPal in order to enquire about a fee that had been charged to my account via PayPal. I explained the situation to customer service and they put me through to the security department and I explained my situation only to be told that I should "contact my bank and they will teach you how to read a bank statement". I found this rude, condescending and insulting towards my intelligence. I contacted my bank and now accept that it was a mistake on my part but I do not think that that justifies being treated like an idiot. Unfortunately, I suffer from social anxiety and found it difficult enough just to pick up the phone, without being made to feel like a fool. I wasn't rude, aggressive, abusive or insulting, in fact, I didn't even raise my voice, so I am not sure what I did to deserve to be spoken to like that. Because of my anxiety I felt deeply shocked and upset by this and forgot to ask for the name of who I was speaking to. All I know is that I was speaking at circa 10 am yesterday to a woman with a Northern Irish accent.

I eagerly anticipate your response.
 

Waybuloo

Well-known member
I have just filed a complaint with them. And I await their response. I am not very good with words so I hope that my email is understood. I would really appreciate if you could give your opinions on where I went wrong or did well so that I know for future reference. I don't expect anybody to do this for me because it is your own time but here it is:

Dear sir or madam,

I yesterday morning phoned PayPal in order to enquire about a fee that had been charged to my account via PayPal. I explained the situation to customer service and they put me through to the security department and I explained my situation only to be told that I should "contact my bank and they will teach you how to read a bank statement". I found this rude, condescending and insulting towards my intelligence. I contacted my bank and now accept that it was a mistake on my part but I do not think that that justifies being treated like an idiot. Unfortunately, I suffer from social anxiety and found it difficult enough just to pick up the phone, without being made to feel like a fool. I wasn't rude, aggressive, abusive or insulting, in fact, I didn't even raise my voice, so I am not sure what I did to deserve to be spoken to like that. Because of my anxiety I felt deeply shocked and upset by this and forgot to ask for the name of who I was speaking to. All I know is that I was speaking at circa 10 am yesterday to a woman with a Northern Irish accent.

I eagerly anticipate your response.

Hey that's a very articulate and clear email and it didn't ramble or anything. Did you give your name and account details? That's a pretty good first complaint letter, keep it for future reference.
 

emre43

Well-known member
I have just received this response from them:

Dear Tom Fitton,

Thank you for contacting PayPal.

I would like to apologise on behalf of PayPal for the manner in which
you were spoken to by one of our representatives.

I hope that any calls you make to us in future are dealt with in a
polite friendly and professional manner.

Once again please accept my apology and please let us know if you
require any further assistance.

Yours sincerely,
Tracey
PayPal
 

A friend

Well-known member
I started another thread a few days ago about how naive I am about stepping up to the wider world.

I didn't quote the whole post because I want to keep this one short & simple.

Feeling and thinking down of yourself will make your life worse. If you have a high opinion on yourself (not too high), you can probably feel better and your life can probably improve.

Thinking that you're an idiot can only make things worse for you.
 
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