Im a 22 year old virgin.
- Thread starter LonelyLoser
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Noca
Banned
If you a girl and your a virgin at 22 that isnt neccesarily a bad thing but it is if your a guy. Try meds and CBT to treat your social anxiety, specifically Adderall XR + Klonopin, that will make meeting/talking to girls WAY!!! easier 
Also try meeting them online first then move to real life, thats what i do and Ive dated 7 ppl so far in my life at age 22.
Also try meeting them online first then move to real life, thats what i do and Ive dated 7 ppl so far in my life at age 22.
V
Virgin Chika
Guest
I'm a 22 year old virgin too. never been kissed and all. My friends cant understand why. they say I dont fit the profile of a virgin at my age. I'm hoping there's still hope for all of us.
Im too a 22 year old virgin, but i have more confidence now i just didn't have confidence when i was a teenager, girls would ask me if they wanted to date me and i didn't think i was good enough so i said sorry i can't. I was bullied and beat up alot by my father and brothers. My father would laugh at me every time i said, she's cute! it made me feel worthless now that i disowned my father i have more confidence. As far as being a virgin????? i could lose it to my sisters best friend but she is weird and obsessive. People who make fun of older virgins have anxiety problems thereselves. Just don't let them hurt you just say yes and look straight in their eyes without any ill emotions then you will see that they are scared of a virgin.
This is my first post so i you like me plz send me a friend request i want to be your friend.
now that i disowned my father i have more confidence. As far as being a virgin????? i could lose it to my sisters best friend but she is weird and obsessive. People who make fun of older virgins have anxiety problems thereselves. Just don't let them hurt you just say yes and look straight in their eyes without any ill emotions then you will see that they are scared of a virgin. This is my first post so i you like me plz send me a friend request i want to be your friend.
JuicyFruit
Well-known member
No, it's not unusual. Just look at me, im 26, still a virgin.
JamesSmith
Well-known member
At 22, yes, it is a little unusual to be a virgin. With my group of friends, the % of people that I knew that were still virgins at that age was pretty small. Most of them had sex in high school, and the rest by the end of the end of college. I was actually the one person out of my friends that went past college years (btw, i didn't graduate) being a virgin.
Right now, I'm a 27 yr old virgin. I used to lie to myself and say it didn't matter, but after pondering this for a while, the past year or so I've been more honest to myself and have confessed that it does matter a little bit. It may be just sex to other people, I've heard them say it before, but when you get to be my age and are still a virgin, it's not just sex. I think sex, especially the first time you have sex, is a big moment in your life, and I know it will an even bigger moment in my life than most people's lives if i ever do have sex considering I've never had it and I'm now at 27 years of age.
I don't think it's the virgin thing that is a bad thing, I think it's the fact that I've never connected enough with a woman for her to want to have sex with me, that's the bad thing. I think of sex as something extra that comes with connecting with a woman intimately. The connection part is what truly matters, and sadly, it's something I've never really experienced. I've had a g/f, but we never really connected on a level I'd call love.
Besides, that was 7 years ago, lol, an eternity ago. 7 years of being alone isn't a good thing. I don't really know what to do, because getting into a relationship requires a lot of social encounters, which is something I don't like doing.
Right now, I'm a 27 yr old virgin. I used to lie to myself and say it didn't matter, but after pondering this for a while, the past year or so I've been more honest to myself and have confessed that it does matter a little bit. It may be just sex to other people, I've heard them say it before, but when you get to be my age and are still a virgin, it's not just sex. I think sex, especially the first time you have sex, is a big moment in your life, and I know it will an even bigger moment in my life than most people's lives if i ever do have sex considering I've never had it and I'm now at 27 years of age.
I don't think it's the virgin thing that is a bad thing, I think it's the fact that I've never connected enough with a woman for her to want to have sex with me, that's the bad thing. I think of sex as something extra that comes with connecting with a woman intimately. The connection part is what truly matters, and sadly, it's something I've never really experienced. I've had a g/f, but we never really connected on a level I'd call love.
Besides, that was 7 years ago, lol, an eternity ago. 7 years of being alone isn't a good thing. I don't really know what to do, because getting into a relationship requires a lot of social encounters, which is something I don't like doing.
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I havn't yet either an my official age is "21" although I don't think of myself as this and feel age is pretty meaningless, its your state of mind that counts.
Anyway hah, I myself fefuse to try and improve my social skills in order to attempt to find sex. And certainly don't wanna use alcohol to attempt it either. I don't understand why so many people need alcohol to have sex. I do feel sometimes that society has made it like that. There seems to be some big association between sex and alcohol. It seems strange to me since sex is a "natural" act. If I were to do it I'd rather experience it with my "clear" head. Atleast not with alchol anyway since I cant se that "enhancing" it. It would just be slower and clumsy I'd imagine hah.
But anyway, abou those webistes. I signed up for adultfriendfinder, and realised you have to pay in order to actually message anyone. So, I now feel about that, what would be the point in dong that, if its still unlikley that anyone I would message would reply, and it costs money? I mayaswell pay for an escort if anything rather than that dont you think? Atleast then its guaranteed, and they'd atleast be understanding to some extent, not expecting me, or whoever to have experience.
But I know so many people say that route ius the ultimate NO. I just think its an option for me. Atlest a better one than compromosing myself in other ways I don't wan't to. Like putting more effort into trying to alter myself when I don't want to, and anything else. Atleast that route would be private and honest. I'm not saying I am going to do that. But it seems a much nicer option to me than going to a bar alone, drinking (which I dont do/nor want to) and attempting it that way-no thanks! haha. I want to be myself.
I might add that I don't want a "girlfriend" in the normal sense, anyway.
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JamesSmith
Well-known member
Wouldn't it be easier to get sex after you've already had it, though? I've found that it's easier to do things in life after I've already done them, because I know I can do them. I doubt sex is much different?
Well, arn't you coming from a perspective there of the act itself? Asin youre saying that its physically easier once you've done it because you might not be as nervous about doing it wrong?
I'm not scared by the idea of doing it wrong due to my inexperince because it seems pretty simple to me aha. But I know it wouldnt really matter if I did do things wrong at first or something. Its more just an awkward thing to get the chance to do in the first place. IMO.
JamesSmith
Well-known member
No, I didn't explain what I meant in enough detail. What I meant was I would think it would be easier to meet women after having had sex because you would know you can connect with a woman enough to have sex with her. I was saying that after you've gone through the process of convincing a woman that you are worthwile to sleep with, and she sleeps with you, that you will have the confidence to repeat that process as you have done that before.
I think a big thing that holds virgins like me back is that I've never connected with a woman well enough to have sex with her, so inside I lack the confidence to connect with a woman well enough on that intimate level.
I wasn't talking about the act of of the actual sex at all. I just meant everything that leads up to the sex. That is the barrier for a guy like me, the entire process of connecting with the woman before sex is a possibility.
OK I see what you mean now.
For myself personally though, its not even like I aim to be able to go up to women and initiate things, in the first place haha. Its just not me.
So if I managed to get it sometime it would be through them initiating. In which case, I wouldn't be able to just repeat it, like that, as I'd have to wait for it to happen as I just described again hah.
And if I paid for it......hah, then I'd know that they didn't choose me and that I can't just repeat that (unless paying agan) cause it would be a fantasy basicaly hah.
Ayway I don't feel the act would change anythin for me, I'd still be just as shy. But thats fine.
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Sora
Well-known member
It's not unusual to be a virgin at that age, I know lots of people who were. I didn't lose it until 21. I know you feel like a part of you is missing but having sex is not going to make that feeling go away. I can tell you that from experience. I don't know if that feeling will ever go away for me it didn't even go away when I was in a serious relationship but I know now she isn't right for me so perhaps that is why.
I've always wanted my other half so I can share my life with her and be complete but so far it's not happened. Try not to connect that feeling with virginity because it's not going to work. Losing my virginity didn't do a thing for me, it's weird though I always felt like I had already had sex so when it came to doing it...it just felt natural and like I had done it before, it's weird I can't explain that.
Hang in there it doesn't matter about your age and hopefully you will find a way to feel complete
Also I never really got a woman until around the age of 20, not properly anyways. I had hardly kissed anyone and I felt more confident in sex and less worried in that than I did in kissing which was weird lol.
I've always wanted my other half so I can share my life with her and be complete but so far it's not happened. Try not to connect that feeling with virginity because it's not going to work. Losing my virginity didn't do a thing for me, it's weird though I always felt like I had already had sex so when it came to doing it...it just felt natural and like I had done it before, it's weird I can't explain that.
Hang in there it doesn't matter about your age and hopefully you will find a way to feel complete
Also I never really got a woman until around the age of 20, not properly anyways. I had hardly kissed anyone and I felt more confident in sex and less worried in that than I did in kissing which was weird lol.
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Sora
Well-known member
Solitudes_Grace
Well-known member
Some of you might be interested to know that according to a series of national, United States surveys of unmarried adolescents between the ages of 15 to 19 conducted in the year 2002, only about 45% of both boys and girls seem to have had sexual intercourse previously. In summary, as of 2002, less than half of adolescent males and females have had sex, and I do not imagine the number is much higher today. Do not feel bad if you have not had sex by the age of 20 or 21 or 22 or whatever, because a lot of other people have not either. Besides, sex is overrated. Just stop caring about it. You will feel better once you do.
By the way, the above statistics are reported in my Sociology of the Family textbook, so they are reputable.
By the way, the above statistics are reported in my Sociology of the Family textbook, so they are reputable.
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-lonestar-
Well-known member
I like hearing from girls. I have the theory that women want someone who is confident, which means you love yourself and nobody can get you down. A guy who can tell them to F^<k off when they are bitches lol. While at the same time can make them laugh. Seriously tho just love yourself, work out to look your best, that builds up confidence, once confidence is built. Aproach women, and try methods, something will work, the more you do this the easier it will be, and everyone gets rejected you get used to it I'm sure. So long as you love yourself girls will too.
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stevelee24
Well-known member
honestly if your so desperate to lose your virginity or gain some experience then employ an escort.
Felgen
Well-known member
An escort is 200 dollars an hour plus cab expenses. One night stands (IMHO) isn't worth that much and the money you save can either be used on two tickets for the Ozzfest, a nice cell phone or 10-20 blu-ray movies.
Sex with someone you love, though, is awesome and you can't put a price tag on that.