I feel like i'm back where i started.

[Liam17]

Hey everyone. I've not posted on in ages.

Basically, everyones goal is to get a relationship, cause it's human nature.

Although, i really cannot stress, how worse it's made me feel. I got more confident, did overcome most my anxiety. But it's impossible. No one, can understand how i feel, i just feel like i'm in the same position again.
I'm so stressed from it. E.g (what i do next, does she feel the same etc.)

Being all nice. Doesn't actually work.

Trust me, don't get me wrong. I'm hurt as hell, but it's just as bad being in it.
*facepalm*


Sorry had to vent, this a lot.
I feel like my depression is getting back
I feel like i'm back where i started.

 

[Phoenixx]

Sorry to hear that you're back where you started. I kinda misunderstood your post though, and I apologize. So... What happened exactly? You were in a relationship? Or are currently in one?

 

[Bustn Justin]

So sorry things are going crappy for ya. There is always hope to get back up on the ladder.

 

[dyingtolive]

ya know dude, maybe dont take it personally.

You worked and developed skills in dealing with SA... you did alot of growing up on that department.. good work and way to go on that!

but dude when it comes to RELATIONSHIPS n LOVE department, thats a whole other ballgame! SA or NOT, everyone gets hit and falls flat on their face on that one! if u didn't act as well as u've expected, maybe thats a more universal experience we all need to work through and get better at handling!.. well goodluck.

being back to where u start aint always a bad thing! its a wake up call to go back to basics. we can get complacent over time n stuff..

 

[Liam17]

Sorry to hear that you're back where you started. I kinda misunderstood your post though, and I apologize. So... What happened exactly? You were in a relationship? Or are currently in one?

Thats the thing. I have no idea.

It's all confusing.
I just want to give up...

 

[Phoenixx]

Thats the thing. I have no idea.

It's all confusing.
I just want to give up...

^ Aw, sorry to hear. I wouldn't give up just yet. Whoever you're with, talk to them. Tell them how you feel, ask them where it's all headed. If it's not going anywhere (even if you are trying) and it's causing more pain in the long run, then I'd probably just break it off. Don't kick yourself over it though. At least give yourself credit for trying.

 

[Feathers]

Sorry to hear about it Liam.

You're still very young, at that age things can be quite confusing.. (and sometimes later too..)

You 'practised', you did things to combat your sa, give yourself credit for that!!

Read 'The Game' by Neil Strauss maybe? (But I hope it doesn't make you into a 'Don Juan/womanizer', just to help you with this girl or maybe a girl or a few later on...)
There are some dating forums online too, where you might get some advice... (some are too biased against women though, so choose advice wisely)

You mustn't be too nice, but you mustn't be too terrible either.. and maybe you guys just weren't 'the right' to be together forever.. some friendships and dating/relationships may be more like 'learning experiences'... to learn what kind of person you wish to be with and what kind of person you wish to be...

Think about it like going up in spiral - you may feel like you're at the same place, it's actually a level ahead... You know how many guys (or girls) on this forum haven't even come close to what you've had??!! (whatever it was ) So you're up'n' ahead now..

If it's still uncertain, give yourself (and her) time to figure it out, maybe just take a break.. (or try to win her back maybe) depends on the situation.. Do you still want her or not? Do you like her as a person? Are you compatible? Is she seeing someone else? Are there outside circumstances?

How's the rest of life going? Sometimes obsessing about relationship can sorta happen to not have to deal with other things too.. And for some girls it's important that you ideally have your life 'together' too.. some girls can have a problem with some lifestyle factors etc. What does she want in life? Can you give that to her? Can you make her happy? Is she working on her own life too?

Things to consider maybe... (?)

 

[Prestonator]

^ Aw, sorry to hear. I wouldn't give up just yet. Whoever you're with, talk to them. Tell them how you feel, ask them where it's all headed. If it's not going anywhere (even if you are trying) and it's causing more pain in the long run, then I'd probably just break it off. Don't kick yourself over it though. At least give yourself credit for trying.

I agree. This is good sound advice! i don't think you will be back where you started cos even if you feel like you have got nowhere with this person, you will have learnt a lot of valuable skills that you can use later on in life! Read my last quote - 'When the World says 'give up', Hope says 'give it another try'