I don't understand why life has to turn out like this

[giantyx]

I don't understand why i am made to feel this way with SA at all, i don't even know what caused my SA, and if anything at all it has to be down to genetics. And i had bad luck all my entire life up till nw, no friends, no job, no life, no interest, no personal strengths nothing. I did try to become better but all of it just makes it feel worse. What's the use of a stupid piece of garbage ass toilet paper university degree if theres nth i can do about my SA. I really am upset and angry because i don't commit crimes, i don't do drugs, i do not go around killing people like terrorist, and i am not a backstabbing hypocrite so why life has to screw me like this.

 

[this_portrait]

I've been wondering similar things for a few years now.

 

[Ithior]

I don't understand what happened to me either. Right now I'm in a better situation than you but I think I'm going in your direction. What's holding everything together is the fact that I go to university everyday and that I live at my parent's house without paying a dime.

When I finish my degree (just 4 months away) I think everything will start falling apart, if I keep my habits and behaviours. In the past days I've been trying to figure out what I have to do to get out of this destructive path but even when I know which step to take next, I find it really hard to get myself to do it (thanks to avoidant personality).

I don't know why I have this problem but in the end it's up to me to get through it, it's my own fault that it keeps getting worse. No one else is forcing me down this path. Thinking you can't do anything about it is wrong, in the end we're just too afraid to move forward and fail. We just can't accept failure in our lives. We have to force ourselves to fail over and over again until we are no longer afraid of it.

That's just my opinion. Easier said than done, I have trouble taking the easiest of steps. But it's my own fault, I blame no one else.

 

[giantyx]

I give up. now i Live just to survive, eat when hungry, slp when tired, die when forced to. Theres no pt doing anything else even if a miracle occurs i would be too old and too poor to enjoy life.

 

[Ithior]

I give up. now i Live just to survive, eat when hungry, slp when tired, die when forced to. Theres no pt doing anything else even if a miracle occurs i would be too old and too poor to enjoy life.

I feel a bit like that. But you're waiting for a miracle to happen, and that's just not how things work. What have you really done to change your situation?

I feel like I just complain about this but never really try to actually change things, I'm just waiting for someone to come and save me. But my situation is on me, not on others. They don't have to save me. They can help me, but ultimately the responsibility to change lies on me.

 

[giantyx]

I feel a bit like that. But you're waiting for a miracle to happen, and that's just not how things work. What have you really done to change your situation?

I feel like I just complain about this but never really try to actually change things, I'm just waiting for someone to come and save me. But my situation is on me, not on others. They don't have to save me. They can help me, but ultimately the responsibility to change lies on me.

School, jobs, therapy, exercise,counselling, meds. All of which takes alot of effort and money, but not gotten me any better. What else can i do? Pray for a better second life and jump off a cliff?

 

[lilmutegirl]

I really am upset and angry because i don't commit crimes, i don't do drugs, i do not go around killing people like terrorist, and i am not a backstabbing hypocrite so why life has to screw me like this.

I relate to this statement all too well. I often think about how my life seems so messed up, and it's not like I've done something heinous to deserve it.

 

[TailsAlone]

I wouldn't be surprised if it's genetic. My Dad had problems of his own when I knew him. Naturally we don't talk to each other at all... ^^

I'm not hurting or bothering anybody. I don't steal. I don't do drugs. I'm polite and accepting toward everyone I meet. I try to do some good, when I feel like doing anything. I could have become a hateful, dangerous person who took out his pain on the rest of the world, but I didn't. I'm a model citizen.

But only one person in the world ever appreciated that, and it was a man I never met.
George Carlin - Motivation Seminars - YouTube
Thanks George.

I don't understand it either.

 

[laure15]

I relate to this statement all too well. I often think about how my life seems so messed up, and it's not like I've done something heinous to deserve it.

It's like we're being punished for being quiet and introverted.

 

[Sora]

Stop trying to figure out why and instead figure out how to live with it, it's hard but figuring out why your this way isn't going to change anything.

We just are, and if you knew why, would it really make a difference? - I doubt it. You would still have the same problems, so instead of wasting time trying to figure it out, just spend your time trying to live with it, because the chances are it's never going to go away.

It's a conditions, the only thing you can do is live with it and tame it, the more you force yourself into situations you hate the more you get used to it.

I have to believe this right now as my worst fear is coming up and I have to do it but I know by the end of it, it will get easier and it already has in other areas where I forced myself to do things. Face fears, and own them, not the other way around!

 

[lonelee1]

I don't understand why i am made to feel this way with SA at all, i don't even know what caused my SA, and if anything at all it has to be down to genetics. And i had bad luck all my entire life up till nw, no friends, no job, no life, no interest, no personal strengths nothing. I did try to become better but all of it just makes it feel worse. What's the use of a stupid piece of garbage ass toilet paper university degree if theres nth i can do about my SA. I really am upset and angry because i don't commit crimes, i don't do drugs, i do not go around killing people like terrorist, and i am not a backstabbing hypocrite so why life has to screw me like this.

i know how you feel. it gets better with time, and work.

or so i hear!!

i think we have to learn to be comfortable with ourselves. there's no such thing as bad luck, even when it feels like life's being a douche. things will be alright.