I dont think i can do this...

[Hottie]

I dunno what to do. I seen a psychairtrist yesterday and she wants me to start on new meds. I dont mind this bit, but the bit i dont like is she told me i cannot drink. What the high hell am i going to do?

I have used this coping mechanism for several years and to suddenly expect me to stop that easy is impossible. I was completely honest with her about the drinking to medicate and now im regreting doing so. She could be using this as an excuse for me to try and not use alcohol to socialize, but she did say it would cancel out the progress but i really dont know what her motive is behind it.

Im considering not taking the meds over this and i feel dumb for even saying that, but i need alcohol to socialize...uggh...just when i thought things were going well for me, she has to rub in my face that things arnt so great

 

[Mickery]

Does non-alcoholic beer or something work as a sort of in-between point?

 

[NathanielWingatePeaslee]

Im considering not taking the meds over this and i feel dumb for even saying that, but i need alcohol to socialize...uggh...just when i thought things were going well for me, she has to rub in my face that things arnt so great

If alcohol is an absolute, unavoidable requirement for socializing, then how much and how often do you need to socialize?

 

[Hottie]

Does non-alcoholic beer or something work as a sort of in-between point?

Well its not a bad suggestion but the thing is (and i dont recommend it) i drink before i go out and it will be so difficult to just walk outside and go to my friends with no drink inside me.

Also all my friends, due to the irish culture, go out every single weekend and gets completely smashed and what am i supposed to do? If im not drinking i cant be around people who are, so its a catch 22.

Without drink, i will fade, fade, fade further away. I will not exist anymore. I have events i want to go to but there is no way i can go if i dont drink. Also what about peoples bday's? All people do to celebrate their bday is party, and i wont even be able to do this...

Uggh, i know ive gotten myself into this situation but now that im in it, i dont know what to do...

 

[Hottie]

If alcohol is an absolute, unavoidable requirement for socializing, then how much and how often do you need to socialize?

Well to answer this question, its at the weekends when i go out and i only do this because of drink..

hmmm im not sure i fully understand the question?

 

[leave_me_alone]

Are there any other activities you could do on the weekends? All of your friends are drinking?

This was the case with me too btw. I stopped going out with them, becase all they did was drink/drugs and now i end up with no friends.

 

[Hottie]

No i can promise you right now... ALL of my friends get wasted every weekend and also sometimes thru the week. But i know i have bad genetics so i try an avoid the mid-week drinking sessions.

But what you said there, about you being alone, that is my biggest fear of what will happen.

There could be other activites but i wouldnt have the courage to do them on my own and nobody would waste their 'precious weekend' not drinking. At this stage the weekend isnt so precious for me, recovery from drugs and managing drink is, but i know that is all their view points atm, to get completely fu*ked up

I dunno, i cant even write more about this its just getting me quite down and i dont know how im going to cope. I had already done something positive and got help for my drug problems, but now it has suddenly all just piled on top of me and i feel quite lost and overwhelmed.

 

[whattodo1]

Check online to see if shes making it up just in order for u to stop drinking..
Otherwise.. my psychiatrist also perscribed me meds (sertraline) and she told me that alcohol reverses the affects but she didnt say i should stop drinking for it to work.. She did tell me to stick to beer tho, but i havent, i always drink vodka. I feel like the meds are working still

 

[awkwardamanda]

There are plenty of medications that don't mix well with alcohol and I'm not just talking about antidepressants. Just tell your friends you can't drink because of medication you're on. If they tease you or ditch you for that, then they have issues. Why is it so frowned upon if a person chooses not to drink? Doesn't somebody have to be the designated driver when you go out? Are those people seriously shunned for being sober? It bothers me that so many people think socializing always has to involve alcohol. It doesn't.

 

[Iseesky]

I think the best thing to do would be to listen to your doctor's advice. Alcohol is obviously not helping your situation. You're still anxious to go out without drinking...You're covering up the problem instead of fixing it. Wouldn't it be so much better to be able to go out and have a good time without having to drink beforehand? Be comfortable with who you are and not what alcohol makes you?

That's just my take...I'm not a drinker. I have confidence as it is, and to me it's more important for me to learn how to be social on my own without the help of a margarita or martini. Friends who don't understand your predicament aren't really friends at all.

 

[Mickery]

I dunno, i cant even write more about this its just getting me quite down and i dont know how im going to cope. I had already done something positive and got help for my drug problems, but now it has suddenly all just piled on top of me and i feel quite lost and overwhelmed.

Hottie, I think it's normal for people to mourn the loss of their old life whenever a big change comes about, especially if they feel it's been forced on them. They feel like something is being taken away, and it's not their fault and it's not fair.

You need to remember that although some aspects of your life are being changed against your will, for the most part this is a deliberate, constructive decision on your part. You can be sad for what is being lost and what used to be, but you should concentrate on being happy for what you're gaining and what's going to happen next in your life.

It's a hard change to make, but the difficulties will pass with time. You'll have more money, you'll remember the good times better, you'll be healthier, you'll attract interest from men who maybe wouldn't be so keen on na angry drunk. You'll get a whole new lifestyle, new hobbies, opportunities you would have missed, people will have a new respect for you and probably already do, you'll be safe from the law. You'll have new friends and perhaps come to see your current friends in a different light. Maybe your positive example will even lead some of your old friends to make the same change for themselves, after all they can't do this forever even if they want to.

 

[Hottie]

All of you are so right and if it wasnt myself, i would be saying these things too, to whoever it may be. But im finding it really difficult to grasp this concept of not drinking. Within the last few weeks, i have been very aware of my alcohol consumption and put techniques in place that would make me lower the alcohol intake...but the problem i am struggling with is 'nothing', i can drink 'nothing'.

If i was even told a limit to stick to, i would feel alot better about this. I am not going to moan about something that can potentially help me (giving it up and going on [more] meds) but i am really getting down about how i have come to be where i am...it feels unfair that 'I' have to give it up. Its my fault i have gotten into this mess (with a very strong help from my culture), but im not sure i want to give it up...thats the thing...

AwarkwardAmanda, you points make sence but it is not my friends that would be like that, they would be supportive (an influence at times of course) and willing to support me thru this (never fully understanding why), but due to the culture here (and my age group), its like there is nothing else to do, other then go out and drink.

Last night i did go out with 2 friends i hadnt seen in a while for dinner and i enjoyed doing that (as much as i hated it!) but as soon as it was over it was off for a few drinks....and that is the norm...

I am aware i may be making excuses for my actions but because erythrophobia is added into the mix, it makes it twice as difficult for me. If i had no symptoms that show themselves i think i could give it a go but due the the phobia just mentioned it makes it really difficult for me.

I was quite depressed for the last week and am still not fully pulled thru it, but i continue to battle on. I said to someone on a different site that one day i believe i will give it up, but i dont know when i will feel ready or if i ever will...

 

[Lccska]

She probably told you not to drink because alcohol is a depressant. They kind of cancel each other out. But the real problem is ....alcohol is a depressant. It does help you socialize, but it doesn't help with the overall problem. You may be surprised at how you feel not drinking. I've known for a very long time that I cannot drink. My mood goes right down the toilet.