How to make new friends?

[CosmicHippo]

I feel lonely sometimes. I look around on Facebook and places and I see people with lives having “guy’s night outs” or hanging out with their friends. I haven’t had a guy’s night out as long as I can remember, because I don’t have any friends anymore. For over an hour, I’ve been crying over it and the tears just won’t go away! I didn’t know where to go so I came here.

Anybody else in the same position?

I feel like this total loser and I wish I had a life. And I keep crying and crying. I don’t know what to do.

 

[Marc7]

I have no real life friends either and it's frustrating and depressing especially when your young like me and go to public places (seeing couples and friends). I feel lonely when I go out. I know how to get friends even though I don't have the motivation to overcome social anxiety and make friends but find a person who you have something in common with and converse with (if you know how do keep a conversation going) them.

 

[WalkAlone]

You have to get out in the world and engage with people.

 

[coyote]

You have to get out in the world and engage with people.

this is the best advice ever given on this forum :thumbup:

 

[Flanscho]

Choose a hobby that can be shared at others.
Search the internet for groups of people in your town with the same hobby.
Meet them.
Now you are in contact with people who have some common interests with you.
They can become your friends.

 

[bsammy]

how old are you OP?if in your 20s or younger, you have plenty of time to meet new people but you have to put yourself out there..the only way i met people growing up was through school or work.i would hang out with these friends and then i would meet their friends, forming a circle of sorts..i dont think i could just go out and meet people on my own and have it really go anywhere..

dont believe all the hype behind facebook photos and guys nights out..they may be enjoyable but they arent nearly the blast that some make it out to be..

 

[jaim38]

First, avoid sites like FB like the plague. It does nothing but drives people nuts.

Second, find people who share similar interests as you - something you both can talk about. I met my friends in libraries and classes.

 

[CosmicHippo]

Thank you everyone for responding so quickly.

To be more accurate, I actually have two friends. But one lives on the other side of the country, and the other has so many other, new friends that I'm a "secondary" friend, when he's only one of two. I really want a girlfriend, too.

I did my volunteer work at the library today, and when I was finished with my work, I looked around for people to start a conversation with to see if maybe I could establish some kind of rapport. Two people my age did converse with me years ago, but I didn't reciprocate for some reason (and boy do I regret it!). There was a cute girl who was kind of giggly and texting on her phone... but I didn't know what to do. I thought about reading a book at the adjacent table and casually glance over once and smile. I was so despondent about my whole situation that I went out to my car and cried for an entire hour. I'm crying now too. I feel like such a baby.

What does "getting out there" mean? The local coffee shop? The movies? I am starting school this spring (I'm a 20-year-old guy, by the way) and thought that there would be a lot of prospective friends there. I've been trying to get a job for a while. At my previous job, everyone there was OLD. I thought about asking this girl Maggie out, but I got fired before I had the chance.

I always see people talking with their friends and hanging out with their girlfriends, and I wish so badly that I had that. I keep crying over it.

Where can I meet people with similar interests?

Thanks again, everybody!

 

[Marc7]

Thank you everyone for responding so quickly.

To be more accurate, I actually have two friends. But one lives on the other side of the country, and the other has so many other, new friends that I'm a "secondary" friend, when he's only one of two. I really want a girlfriend, too.

I did my volunteer work at the library today, and when I was finished with my work, I looked around for people to start a conversation with to see if maybe I could establish some kind of rapport. Two people my age did converse with me years ago, but I didn't reciprocate for some reason (and boy do I regret it!). There was a cute girl who was kind of giggly and texting on her phone... but I didn't know what to do. I thought about reading a book at the adjacent table and casually glance over once and smile. I was so despondent about my whole situation that I went out to my car and cried for an entire hour. I'm crying now too. I feel like such a baby.

What does "getting out there" mean? The local coffee shop? The movies? I am starting school this spring (I'm a 20-year-old guy, by the way) and thought that there would be a lot of prospective friends there. I've been trying to get a job for a while. At my previous job, everyone there was OLD. I thought about asking this girl Maggie out, but I got fired before I had the chance.

I always see people talking with their friends and hanging out with their girlfriends, and I wish so badly that I had that. I keep crying over it.

Where can I meet people with similar interests?

Thanks again, everybody!

I know how you feel because I'm the same age as you. But you should keep on trying an looking for people your age whether it be at the place where you volunteer or if you get a job. Also btw when you go to college maybe you can find a group where you all have similar interests.

 

[Kiwong]

When I go out in the world to try to engage I feel fear. Fear of the way the world will react to me.

 

[bsammy]

i dont see how you couldnt make a few friends at school..there arent any people in your classes that you talk to that seem friendly?

'getting out there' means going to social events and other places where people are..again though, just my opinion but you will have a tough time just randomly meeting people at the mall or bookstore unless the right circumstance comes up..you never want to come across as needy or starving for friendship imo..

in all my experience i never went out and tried to make friends, they just happened through school or sports..what are your hobbies?

 

[Flanscho]

Where can I meet people with similar interests?

Depends. I like board games, so I checked a website that is about finding people to play board and card games with.

A friend of mine likes cooking. So she went to adult evening classes for cooking, and made friends there.

Same works with sports, singing (join a choir) and so on.