How much does bullying REALLY f**** you up

[theslowesthand]

I was wondering how much PHYSICAL bullying (as opposed VERBAL bullying) affects people, during the growing-up years.

Here's a list of my own experiences i've had with physical bullying...

Primary school...

• At home. Struck on head by skateboard by younger relative
• At school. Knocked off stilts. later known to get into fights with other kids (angry type), regarded as "friend"
• Holiday camp. An "ugly" boy giving me "evil"/threatening looks running away .. dragged out from under steps at side of building .. held up by scruff-of-neck
  a bunch kids (all/most were boys; might have been a girl/s also (known by boys; who might have approached, as recall 1/2 kids sticking-up for me, saying to let me go, not be mean, etc)). Told them my dad was nearby (he was), & gave his name, they agreed '<name's> a good man', (like THEY would know!; clearly did not see ME in same light) & said he would beat them up
• Poked deep in ear (painful as well as dangerous) with a grass stem (again by sby i trusted, & who always seemed friendly to me)
• Physically "stood over" by the vice-principle, who was quite an aggressive/scary man. Maybe he was justified, as being so weak-minded & pushover, a "friend" (boy) said he would "tell on me" for looking at a porn magazine some boys found, UNLESS i went & "admitted" it to principle. So i went to principle's office, & asked to speak to him, but vice-principle came to door, & said 'why?', etc. So i told him, and then then aggressively "took into me", verbally-wise, hovering over me like some evil spirit, until a really big boy came along & intervened, standing eye-to-eye with him! (its always good when somebody fends-off a bully for you, doesn't happen enough though)
• Can't recall exactly, but i remember having to ward-off this big boy with a chair (he was definately threatening me; maybe he had a chair also, can't recall)

Intermediate school...

• At public/school library, outside school hours. Brutally knocked off chair (i think i was struck a solid blow to head)
• At school, in class. Poked several times with a compass in class (but he did it to boy sitting next to me, so i swapped with him, and then started to get poked myself!, which PROVES that it's not "all about you", but it's all about the bully & his/her problems)
• Being held up by front of shirt. By someone i was on ok terms with, to impress his Friend already in High School (whom he spotted). Introduction day at high school. He ASKED me, & i AGREED (out of wanting to please - so maybe a kind of SELF-INFLICTED bullying??) lol

High school...

• At home. My brother (2 years older) regularly "flicked" my bum with fingertips (stung) whenever he got the chance (but after a year/so of this, i began to "flick" him back)
• At school, swimming class. held underwater for 20 or so seconds (just enough to make me start to panic & start to "thrash")
• At school. Occasionally got my ear "pinged" (& bully did same to my best friend, him more than me, prob as bigger ears)
• At school, lunch. Large rock thrown at my head (luckily dodged it)
• At school. shouldered as passed in corridor between classes
• grabbed my ear & twisted it; bus on school trip; "friend"
• At school, between classes. Held up by throat against wall
• At school. Briefly grabbed by 2 of my regular bullies (in steel workshop class), when nearby open furnace, with the threat to stick my head in it
• struck on head by sth; saw "stars"; suspect one of my group of friends (an electronics/computer techie, who had been bring a diy 20kV electronic zapper to school); i Q him a few years later about it, but he denied it; might not have been him, but there was NOBODY about in library, but he COULD have dangled it on a string from above; maybe just me being paranoid, but SOMETHING had to have done it, SURELY??? or did i have a "brain hemorrage" or sth??? felt like somebody had whacked me about head with a telephone directory with maximum force
• At school. Tripped (felt onto flat onto floor) as exiting toilets. (just now had a thought that maybe trying to emulate my tripping as walking on stage in assembly in front of whole school??)
• At school, in class. This one is a bit more "disturbing" than the others, as it was done by a (male) teacher (whom i trusted). He "spanked" (was quite painful) the top of my hand once, with a whiteboard pointer, and asked 'did that hurt?' (was he seeing if i "felt" stuff??) --> i replied 'no' --> he then asked 'shall i do it again?' --> i replied 'no' and promptly withdrew my hand from the desktop. High school. Age: 15-16
• At school, before class. Pulled backwards (on 2 or 3 occasions) sitting on rail over concrete path (somebody mentioned a kid died from such)
• At school. Paper bag popped in my ear as i walked past during break

Post-schooling years...

• In pub. Pushed deliberately from behind in pub, splashing friend i was talking to (who was very angry); i turned around & there were 3 "darkies" just standing there staring at us, in hindsight, obviously looking for a fight, which i did not oblige ...
  
  These 2 are probably the most "concerning" for me
  
• Standing at traffic lights, waiting to cross, got "green man", just strted to walk accross & the V8 car at head of queue (still with red/stop) SUDDENLY BURST-OFF, RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME (<1 metre); amazing thing is he was at right-angle so had to turn 90deg to pass in front of me
• Was cycling home from work, a car did a "doghnut" a few 100 meters ahead at intersection --> drove off --> returned as i was turning into main road & the B****RDS CUT-ME-OFF!!! (forcing me off tarseal & even off the gravel; onto the grass verge); if i hadn't moved they WOULD have RUN RIGHT OVER ME!!! (the unfortunate thing is i didnt get numberplate, & car was non-descript)
  
  The following 2 are possibly threats of physical violence (mainly the 1st one)
  
• Walking to town (in my "pub years"). Car of skin-heads stopped by me on side of road, one asked for 'a light' --> i said 'sorry, i don't smoke' --> he repeated --> i repeated -> drove off (in hindsight he may have "meant" sth else?). Then an hour/so later, walking back home, the same car drove past, and it stopped at the first house ahead of me (~200 me), pulling into the drive, blocking the path. I kept walking, and as i got near i crossed the road, and they started to quickly reverse back, so i quickened my pace into a jog to avoid being struck or approached by reversing car. Then they drove off in oppsoite direction. That was last i saw of that buch of "goons".
• In town. Walking home from pub (group of males tried to rile-me-up by shouting/etc)

Most events I felt i "deserved", and so didn't "fight back", and didn't feel angry/outraged/etc, just sad/picked-on/disliked/etc.
Since they happened, i have thought that they barely affected me, and that were simply a normal part of growing up as a boy/male. But MAYBE they affected me QUITE A LOT or even A GREAT DEAL???.
As can be seen, the instances of physical bullying became significantly more frequent during my (esp early) teenaged years. And of course, they were only the TIP OF ICEBERG of all the bullying/abuse i got on a fairly regular basis.
And ALL of these events were ENTIRELY UNPROVOKED on my part.

 

[Dronee]

No man... you do not deserve to be treated like that. You didn't provoke them or hurt them. What they did was and is wrong.

 

[kylesesh]

Mate i've been there and it has ****ed me up left, right and center through
secondary school here's a list of whats happened to me.

I've had a hate / death website made about me
Threatened with a knife
Had a bottle smashed over my face
Pushed down a flight of stairs
Kicked in the groin in the middle of class
Had paper balls thrown at my head
Attacked as i got on the bus for no reason
Had a block of wood thrown at my head
Pushed onto the floor
Accused of damaging the toilets
Being called a twat, retard, spaz, idiot... EVERY DAY
Getting kicked repeatedly with steel toe cap boots
Threatened with a gun on the bus

I just took it all and became a recluse... I just listened to music in my bedroom to escape from it all.

Then i changed and became violent because of all the hatred i got every day.

 

[ありがとう]

Dang, that's some bad experience you've had. I haven't really experienced many physical abuse, more mentally ones - mainly because girls tend to be more subtle and tend to verbalize it.

I guess the only few I can name that were physically direct at me were: having paper balls thrown at me all the time, had a shoe thrown on my head, been dragged into the girl's toilet and shoved against a wall...

Some mentally ones were: girls made chants about me, spread rumours that I was pregnant - since that day everyone literally gave me funny looks and just laughed at me, been left out, glared at, sniggered at, threw my stationary/exercise books away, been made fun of daily~~ Like kyle I didn't do anything about it (even though the teachers knew) :S Except I never turned violent, it just made me really pacifist... I still feel angry about them though.

 

[Quiet Angel]

I've mostly endured verbal bullying but here's a few of the physical ones:

-A girl flung water at me after she was done washing her hands in
the women's bathroom.
-Someone approached my desk, grabbed all my textbooks and such,
and roughly threw them to the ground. Papers flew everywhere.
-Paper balls, erasers, and pencils thrown at me.
-Someone placed a few stickers in my hair.
-A guy tried to trip me but putting his leg out, but I managed to avoid it.

That's about it. Nothing too dramatic. I'm very very sorry to hear about
your negative experiences. It's shocking how mean people can be. Really.

 

[Felgen]

I haven't been bullied physically since elementary school. I was bullied passive-aggressively in middle school, though. I often get along well with popular, outgoing people, despite being remarkably different from them, but to this day, I still have a strong resentment against passive-aggressive people.

 

[0neBIGZER0]

think about that..

lost my high salary job
lost my savings
10,000.00 hospital bills
a college degree that i can't use

all because I went back to school to get another degree, I was harassed and bullied by students who were not even American citizen and my instructor god dammed to hell was against me. Little jabs, sometime outright insults and I fired back and lost everything.

When you standup and fight back the bullies will raise the bar, usually bullies have influence and freedom to carry out these actions and the victim does not have that so the victim looses even he/she fight back.

 

[0neBIGZER0]

I've mostly endured verbal bullying but here's a few of the physical ones:

-A girl flung water at me after she was done washing her hands in
the women's bathroom.
-Someone approached my desk, grabbed all my textbooks and such,
and roughly threw them to the ground. Papers flew everywhere.
-Paper balls, erasers, and pencils thrown at me.
-Someone placed a few stickers in my hair.
-A guy tried to trip me but putting his leg out, but I managed to avoid it.

That's about it. Nothing too dramatic. I'm very very sorry to hear about
your negative experiences. It's shocking how mean people can be. Really.

my instructor put some books on my assigned seat as I walked in the class and guys setting next to me was lauging. Another tim he asked me to move to another seat while everyone occupied their assigned seat.

 

[0neBIGZER0]

Mate i've been there and it has ****ed me up left, right and center through
secondary school here's a list of whats happened to me.

I've had a hate / death website made about me
Threatened with a knife
Had a bottle smashed over my face
Pushed down a flight of stairs
Kicked in the groin in the middle of class
Had paper balls thrown at my head
Attacked as i got on the bus for no reason
Had a block of wood thrown at my head
Pushed onto the floor
Accused of damaging the toilets
Being called a twat, retard, spaz, idiot... EVERY DAY
Getting kicked repeatedly with steel toe cap boots
Threatened with a gun on the bus

I just took it all and became a recluse... I just listened to music in my bedroom to escape from it all.

Then i changed and became violent because of all the hatred i got every day.

hey bud...that is just f@#$ up. Me too man same here. I latterly push people out of the way, if some one honk at me at the stop light I have gotten out of the car and walked toward that car just so I can see him flung and he did I felt empowered.

Once this guy gave me a finger I turned around and followed that car and at the stop light I got out and walked toward him and he said "My bad dude..i am sorry) and there were four guys in that car.

I was not a violent guy but I am now. I am constantly looking for a fight.

I am not saying it is right but I will not take crap from any one that includes god himself.

 

[Hellhound]

Those people were totally wrong, you never deserved it. No one should have treated you like that. And that teacher of yours was f*cked up in the head. Why would he do such a thing? Wtf? Abusive people like that shouldn't be allowed to work in schools. They aren't capable of dealing with children and teens (or even raise their own kids).

 

[EasySkanking]

You know, I'm pretty old now (24) and trying forget my past, so I don't really remember all the times that I was bullied but I'm sure they were enough to give me social phobia.

Anyway, just wanted to say that I wish I could be a superhero and fight-off all the bullies from people of all ages, now that I'm older and able to fend for myself. (Would be a cool superhero to be, no? ) Some people try to bully me nowadays too at work, but as soon as they see that I don't take any ****, and talk back or hit them back, they get scared and back off (bullies really are pussies )

 

[theslowesthand]

Edit: I have added quite bit to my original post...

 

[scarednotshy]

my youngest child was diagnosed with autism at age three. he's now six and seems to be aspergers. well, he hasn't been bullied yet, but with the stories i've heard about aspie kids getting bullied, my husband and i have decided that we WILL NOT allow it. so far nobody has bullied him but my husband has been roughhousing with him lately and i told him "teach him how to throw a punch" cuz with all the zero tolerance regarding bullying in the schools what ends up happening is the kids who get bullied get punished along with the bully for defending themselves. ain't happening. if someone bullies my son and he goes over and clocks them dead in the face and it makes them think twice before they say or do another thing to that boy then job well done!

that happened to someone i know. she was a loner. quiet, shy. she was bullied and pushed around by this group of girls for a long period (she is also stunning and i think the ringleader was jealous) well, one day she reached the end of her long fuse, dropped her books and beat the living **** out of the ring leader. they never bothered her again. LOVE IT!!!!!

when i hear these stories and and the lifelong damage you suffer because of it it enrages me. i can certainly understand feeling some violent feelings due to it. it def won't help anything to be violent but i understand feeling powerless can cause that.

my oldest son was bullied and i tried my best to defend/protect him but the teachers didn't do enough. he'd end up in trouble then told her should have come and got him/her. meanwhile it's going on right under their noses?????? i'll be DAMNED if one more of my children go through that and suffer for life. life is hard enough without that bull****.

I am so sorry you guys had to go through that!!!!!!!!!!! >(

 

[sanitariumcalls]

*raises hand* Teachers do. not. care. Hands down. They do NOT get paid well at all, their benefits suck, and its one to 30 teacher student ratio in most American Schools. Hell, my middle school/high schools I went to had up to 45 kids in one class!

I was bullied, kid you not, from my first day at 1st grade up until I dropped out in 10th grade and got my GED. It ranged from passive aggressive to full blown I-got-my-ass-whooped. And there were times I could withstand it, other times I was expelled because of the no tolerance policies and I fought back.

The reality is, there are some real nasty kids in this world, and even worse is some of their parents encourage it! I had a friend a few years back who told her 6 year old to be the class b*stard because its the only way to make it through to graduation! Needless to say I ended that association...

But kids are cruel and nasty, and no one does a damn thing about it no matter how much you hear schools say they care *pfft* whatever...

 

[scarednotshy]

*raises hand* Teachers do. not. care. Hands down. They do NOT get paid well at all, their benefits suck, and its one to 30 teacher student ratio in most American Schools. Hell, my middle school/high schools I went to had up to 45 kids in one class!

I was bullied, kid you not, from my first day at 1st grade up until I dropped out in 10th grade and got my GED. It ranged from passive aggressive to full blown I-got-my-ass-whooped. And there were times I could withstand it, other times I was expelled because of the no tolerance policies and I fought back.

The reality is, there are some real nasty kids in this world, and even worse is some of their parents encourage it! I had a friend a few years back who told her 6 year old to be the class b*stard because its the only way to make it through to graduation! Needless to say I ended that association...

But kids are cruel and nasty, and no one does a damn thing about it no matter how much you hear schools say they care *pfft* whatever...

you are right in that they are overwhelmed. some care and some do not. we are fortunate in that the principal of the school my little ones go to is very visible and involved. when my then seven year old daughter had some issues with some male bully on the playground, after my husband confronted him twice he kept it up so we went to the principal. she took immediate action. i don't know exactly what she did but she took it very seriously and was very angry. my daughter said he wasn't in school the next day and the bullying stopped. this was second grade. i don't know if they suspend kids in second grade but if that's what happened good. put a little scare in him.

also, they other day my son was running on the way to school, then jumped up on this low wall he likes to run on and fell right off. cut himself up bad. my husband carried him to the school. first thing out of his teachers mouth was, "WHO pushed him? tell me the kids name!" thinking that a kid pushed him in the courtyard. so maybe all the news about bullying and cyber bullying and all the school shootings and suicides are getting the schools to sit up and take action before it gets too bad. hopefully. the teacher student ratio you mentioned is a deterrent to staying on top of stuff but i feel that the zero tolerance thing is too much. i understand it in theory but it should be dealt with on a case by case basis. if children aren't allowed to defend themselves they feel powerless which leads to the above stories and being a member of this group in later years (not that these boards are a bad thing, lol)

cute part of that story though is when the school nurse was bandaging him she said, "what happened?" and he said through the tears, "i was running to the first grade." (he likes school this year as opposed to kindergarten cuz first grade is BIG STUFF to him lol)

 

[sanitariumcalls]

you are right in that they are overwhelmed. some care and some do not. we are fortunate in that the principal of the school my little ones go to is very visible and involved. when my then seven year old daughter had some issues with some male bully on the playground, after my husband confronted him twice he kept it up so we went to the principal. she took immediate action. i don't know exactly what she did but she took it very seriously and was very angry. my daughter said he wasn't in school the next day and the bullying stopped. this was second grade. i don't know if they suspend kids in second grade but if that's what happened good. put a little scare in him.

also, they other day my son was running on the way to school, then jumped up on this low wall he likes to run on and fell right off. cut himself up bad. my husband carried him to the school. first thing out of his teachers mouth was, "WHO pushed him? tell me the kids name!" thinking that a kid pushed him in the courtyard. so maybe all the news about bullying and cyber bullying and all the school shootings and suicides are getting the schools to sit up and take action before it gets too bad. hopefully. the teacher student ratio you mentioned is a deterrent to staying on top of stuff but i feel that the zero tolerance thing is too much. i understand it in theory but it should be dealt with on a case by case basis. if children aren't allowed to defend themselves they feel powerless which leads to the above stories and being a member of this group in later years (not that these boards are a bad thing, lol)

cute part of that story though is when the school nurse was bandaging him she said, "what happened?" and he said through the tears, "i was running to the first grade." (he likes school this year as opposed to kindergarten cuz first grade is BIG STUFF to him lol)

It seems some principals have humanized since I was in school lol I remember every name of every principal I had just because they told me to my face, "They obviously have been given a reason to make fun of you, so whatever it is, stop doing it!"

How the hell do you tell a kid (I was 12 at the time) to stop being themselves?

Anyway, the hope I hold is that adults in schools will learn to think with their hearts not their tenure... I'm glad that your child had caring teachers!

 

[theslowesthand]

my youngest child was diagnosed with autism at age three. he's now six and seems to be aspergers

I probably have Aspergers, but nobody knew (incl myself) all throughout growing up (so people might have thought i was just being a "d*ck" or sth)

well, he hasn't been bullied yet, but with the stories i've heard about aspie kids getting bullied, my husband and i have decided that we WILL NOT allow it

Thats a very good attitude, and i commend you for that. But keep in mind that you won't be able to stop ALL the bullying, maybe just most of it (unless you stay with him everywhere he goes, 24/7)

so far nobody has bullied him but my husband has been roughhousing with him lately and i told him "teach him how to throw a punch"

Just an idea. What about also "roughhousing" him with verbal/emotional bullying? I know, very tricky, but I think that is the only real way to beat most bullies (as some dont even respond to a "beating", and some get even worse!). One way or the other, your son needs to be able to "stick up for" himself, otherwise he's gonna be "bully-fodder" all throughout his growing-up years, and afterwards. Bullies do as they do, they generally can't be stopped. In school, most overt, ongoing bullying might be able to be stopped, but what about the covert forms? opportunistic? and outside of schooling?.
Learning to "defend" onself physically is fine. But that will only be used on very rare situations (& with a few exceptions, physical violence is not advisable). MOST of the bullying (that could happen, not will) will need to be defended against in another way --> mentally/emotionally/[verbally].
I think, for the long-term, mental/emotional defence is the way to go (as most "attacks" will not be suitable for physical or verbal defence/retaliation). Anyway its pointless to try to defend oneself via attack ("attack best form of defence" quote), if the damage has already been done. One needs to actually work at preventing those reactions in the first place. And secondly, to develop rock-solid habits for dealing with those situations, when they arise, so that one can "get out of trouble" before it escalates. Very "tricky" stuff to learn to master, especially as quite a bit of it is "instinctive" (we react automatically, even before being consciouly aware of the provocation).
It's almost like developing a "thick skin", but maybe more like "water of a ducks back".
And anyway, the mental/emotional is what bullies are targeting, via their actions and words, so that is what potential victims need to concentrate on "bulking-up" in terms of defence.

when i hear these stories and and the lifelong damage you suffer because of it it enrages me. i can certainly understand feeling some violent feelings due to it. it def won't help anything to be violent but i understand feeling powerless can cause that

Yeah, i agree. I think my past problems with rage have probably been due to all the years and years that i felt a powerless victim - of bullying, intimidation, fear (feeling intimidated), being put-down, etc.
All up, my growing-up years were pretty much "rougher than a dog's breakfast" due to all of that c*rap. Of course if i weren't overly-sensitive as i were, i may have been "fine". But i was, and the damage was/is done.

I am so sorry you guys had to go through that!!!!!!!!!!! >(

For some reason, i don't think what i went through was "that bad" - i kind of think i'm just being a "sook". It's probably due to the majorly macho culture we have in this country. But i really do think those experiences have affected me, just how much is the question..


Also, I have a domineering/angry father with a short-fuse & violent temper. Maybe thats a form of "bullying"? It certainly resulted in a grave fear of triggering his anger, and i never really "trusted" him overall. He also "ribbed" me quite regularly - in a "playful" way, but i now see that it had malicious/hidden under-currents. So emotionally-wise, i never "opened-up" to him (always kept an aloof "fence" up)

 

[scarednotshy]

I probably have Aspergers, but nobody knew (incl myself) all throughout growing up (so people might have thought i was just being a "d*ck" or sth)

Thats a very good attitude, and i commend you for that. But keep in mind that you won't be able to stop ALL the bullying, maybe just most of it (unless you stay with him everywhere he goes, 24/7)[/B][/B]



Just an idea. What about also "roughhousing" him with verbal/emotional bullying? I know, very tricky, but I think that is the only real way to beat most bullies (as some dont even respond to a "beating", and some get even worse!). One way or the other, your son needs to be able to "stick up for" himself, otherwise he's gonna be "bully-fodder" all throughout his growing-up years, and afterwards. Bullies do as they do, they generally can't be stopped. In school, most overt, ongoing bullying might be able to be stopped, but what about the covert forms? opportunistic? and outside of schooling?.
Learning to "defend" onself physically is fine. But that will only be used on very rare situations (& with a few exceptions, physical violence is not advisable). MOST of the bullying (that could happen, not will) will need to be defended against in another way --> mentally/emotionally/[verbally].
I think, for the long-term, mental/emotional defence is the way to go (as most "attacks" will not be suitable for physical or verbal defence/retaliation). Anyway its pointless to try to defend oneself via attack ("attack best form of defence" quote), if the damage has already been done. One needs to actually work at preventing those reactions in the first place. And secondly, to develop rock-solid habits for dealing with those situations, when they arise, so that one can "get out of trouble" before it escalates. Very "tricky" stuff to learn to master, especially as quite a bit of it is "instinctive" (we react automatically, even before being consciouly aware of the provocation).
It's almost like developing a "thick skin", but maybe more like "water of a ducks back".
And anyway, the mental/emotional is what bullies are targeting, via their actions and words, so that is what potential victims need to concentrate on "bulking-up" in terms of defence.



Yeah, i agree. I think my past problems with rage have probably been due to all the years and years that i felt a powerless victim - of bullying, intimidation, fear (feeling intimidated), being put-down, etc.
All up, my growing-up years were pretty much "rougher than a dog's breakfast" due to all of that c*rap. Of course if i weren't overly-sensitive as i were, i may have been "fine". But i was, and the damage was/is done.


For some reason, i don't think what i went through was "that bad" - i kind of think i'm just being a "sook". It's probably due to the majorly macho culture we have in this country. But i really do think those experiences have affected me, just how much is the question..


Also, I have a domineering/angry father with a short-fuse & violent temper. Maybe thats a form of "bullying"? It certainly resulted in a grave fear of triggering his anger, and i never really "trusted" him overall. He also "ribbed" me quite regularly - in a "playful" way, but i now see that it had malicious/hidden under-currents. So emotionally-wise, i never "opened-up" to him (always kept an aloof "fence" up)

Okay, you'll notice I totally messed up on answering the quote and it's a bit messed up but I think you'll figure it out. Not so good at this ::

I'm sure there are undiagnosed Aspies all over the place because the criteria for diagnoses keeps changing as we understand the spectrum. I've at times thought I was but I think I just have traits, which is common in families of children on the spectrum.

Definitely can't be with him 24/7. It's just an "over my dead body" feeling at the thought of it and I realize I didn't do enough for my older son. If I have to and if things were to get that bad, I would homeschool him. But so far, so good. The like him in spite of his "oddness".

As for "mental/emotional" roughhousing that would be a bit difficult at this point because he still needs coaching just to be able to answer correctly "how are you today?" or everyday questions like that and doesn't seem to process certain things or understand the types of questions and how to answer. He is overly literal too. He's getting better with this stuff with time though and then we could teach him that. My husband jokes with the kids constantly and he says "dad, why you always say funny things to me?". He doesn't get sarcasm yet either. He kinda gets the black and white of a joke or serious but he has more trouble with abstract thinking.

The more sensitive the person will take it deep to heart whereas someone with a rougher exterior might not be as affected but it affects people to some degree and causes some measure of damage. I wish parents would strongly inform their children that verbal/physical bullying is not okay. I know I told my children when they were very young and would tell me stories about other kids in school "don't you let me hear you took part in that. you be different. think about if it was you and treat them like you would want to be treated." and i'm very proud of them cuz they always listened to that. In fact my daughter Emily and my daughter Molly would go out of their way to stand in defense of kids and it got bullies to back off (at least while they were around)

In-home bullying really prepares you for life, huh? Well, at least it primes you for social bullying

 

[RelentlessHamster]

It actually made the stronger, and it's funny to see that these people turned out to be I think it had worse effects on them

 

[fitftw]

I was made fun of and had the crap kicked out of me when I was younger. Someone kept putting gum on my combination locker in high school every single morning and I never found out who. It was disgusting.