How do you deal with heartbreak?
- Thread starter Dronee
- Start date
twiggle
Well-known member
I used to grab a glass of wine and turn up the music.
Nowadays I think about all the times I've been heartbroken in the past, and how I've got over it each and everytime... "I'll never meet anyone like him again!!!" I used to say, then. *a year later* "I'll never meet anyone like him again! (different dude)* Now, its....
"i probably WILL meet someone I like as much again, but at the moment its upsetting and I'm going to wallow in it"
ALLOW yourself to wallow, cry, be upset because if you don't do it now then these feelings will only come out later. But keep yourself busy. Go for a run. Do some exercise, post on here, anything to take your mind off of things for a few hours a day.
It does get easier, I promise.
(And if its any consolation, I'm currently experiencing the same thing)
Nowadays I think about all the times I've been heartbroken in the past, and how I've got over it each and everytime... "I'll never meet anyone like him again!!!" I used to say, then. *a year later* "I'll never meet anyone like him again! (different dude)* Now, its....
"i probably WILL meet someone I like as much again, but at the moment its upsetting and I'm going to wallow in it"
ALLOW yourself to wallow, cry, be upset because if you don't do it now then these feelings will only come out later. But keep yourself busy. Go for a run. Do some exercise, post on here, anything to take your mind off of things for a few hours a day.
It does get easier, I promise.
(And if its any consolation, I'm currently experiencing the same thing)
geekyloaner
Well-known member
I am a guy I like to cry andlisting to depressing music so my brain slows down to reflect myself.
Hastings & Main
Well-known member
Twiggle has it.
Take some time once a day to just get in and wallow in it. Embrace the hurt and just let go; cry til your face hurts (harder for men to do), wait til you settle again. Then release another torrent because like sneezing, crying jags usually come in pairs.
Maybe have a nap afterwards, as it takes a lot out of you - which is good, because some of what's leaving is the pain, and it'll flow away eventually (which is a word I hate - I want a specific time when the pain will end!
)
It's normal to dote on the person, but it's best to set a limit on how much time is spent doing it. I used to think of it like a broken leg: you'll heal, but it's terrible waiting...
(I'm still going through some unrequited love which doesn't look like it'll end soon. A much, much mellower ache, but no fun nonetheless....)
Take some time once a day to just get in and wallow in it. Embrace the hurt and just let go; cry til your face hurts (harder for men to do), wait til you settle again. Then release another torrent because like sneezing, crying jags usually come in pairs.
Maybe have a nap afterwards, as it takes a lot out of you - which is good, because some of what's leaving is the pain, and it'll flow away eventually (which is a word I hate - I want a specific time when the pain will end!
)It's normal to dote on the person, but it's best to set a limit on how much time is spent doing it. I used to think of it like a broken leg: you'll heal, but it's terrible waiting...
(I'm still going through some unrequited love which doesn't look like it'll end soon. A much, much mellower ache, but no fun nonetheless....)
WeirdyMcGee
Well-known member
huuuuuuuh... I've been depressed/suicidal/agoraphobic for 2 years now, so I'm not so sure my way of 'dealing' has been the best- or most healthy.
haha
haha
Falkor
1
I've been heartbroken in the past, and I thought I'd never get over these exes, but eventually I don't give a ****. Of course that person still has something interesting because you didn't fall in love without a 'reason' but I don't miss them anymore. but if that other person doesn't see that reason, what love is all about sudden, and start to act distant and tell it's over, or take a break, it knocks you down and those words are smashed in the face, It hurted me like a sledgehammer, I can't describe. I started crying and couldn't stop. My world was tumbled down and crashing, I thought I'd never could live without this person and see? I can. you just carry on to another way and know that everything will be okay. the thing is, you've been close to this person, and shared all your love with, stories, so much left to say you want to tell to your lover, but he/she isn't your lover anymore, it's all gone, the ''I tell you it's over'' person is in hurt too, but the ''Victim of a broken heart'' deals with the pain, the pain is not shared, so it's separated, which means you don't share the same anymore, and that's what makes me think, that if love is strong, you can fight together, but sadly love is a trip, a trip of days, years or a everlasting time, it just depends on the connection between both partners. You should enjoy the trip every moment, make it special, time to time. Enjoy life too, life can be beautiful.
But how to deal with heartbreak? Easy? No. Nobody should ever tell you it's easy, and if somebody ever is telling you ''oh that girl has been so bad to you, you shouldn't be upset'' you should think like, ok, but i was in love, i felt something special which i never wanted to lose, but in some way, you should listen, even though it might makes non-sense, the other person doesn't love you anymore, so that's a big deal, try to talk about this, why your partner feels no sparkle, and try to accept it, don't think about too many memories, think about your future, think of what he/she would miss about you, it's hard to let go, but someday it'll heal and you think back of it, as a good old time.
But how to deal with heartbreak? Easy? No. Nobody should ever tell you it's easy, and if somebody ever is telling you ''oh that girl has been so bad to you, you shouldn't be upset'' you should think like, ok, but i was in love, i felt something special which i never wanted to lose, but in some way, you should listen, even though it might makes non-sense, the other person doesn't love you anymore, so that's a big deal, try to talk about this, why your partner feels no sparkle, and try to accept it, don't think about too many memories, think about your future, think of what he/she would miss about you, it's hard to let go, but someday it'll heal and you think back of it, as a good old time.
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Letting whatever emotion you have inside you out is seemly the best way. It's not something you can just force yourself through. With that said, I don't think there's any proper way of dealing with it.
Let it corrode over time, making yourself as comfortable as possible in the meanwhile.
Let it corrode over time, making yourself as comfortable as possible in the meanwhile.
agoraphobickatie
Well-known member
time. you have to know that no matter how bad your hurt in the moment, time will heal. have some faith that one day you will be better and you will find better.. trust that everything happens for a reason and if you're no longer with someone, it's simply because there's someone out there for you, whether you find them tomorrow or years down the road, you have to let yourself live the journey in the meantime and know it will all be worth it.. two years ago when my anxiety started to really get worse, my boyfriend (whom i lived with and planned to marry) broke my heart.. he said he just wanted to be alone and i had to move out of our apartment, which grew to be my home.. i was crushed, but i talked a lot with my friends, and convinced myself that it just wasn't meant to me. i focused on the bad things about our relationship, and realized that someday, i'd meet someone better and i'd be much much happier.. i cried for weeks, but eventually i started having more and more better days and less bad days.. now i've found someone much much better, and much more supportive when i'm going through hard times instead of kicking me to the curb, ha..
DangerEchidna
Member
I'm in the midst of what is probably the worst heartbreak I've ever had. One way I've been dealing with it by reading a lot about a lot of other people's heartbreaks, which is why I clicked on this thread.
Don't watch the notebook!!!
agoraphobickatie
Well-known member
^^ lol i actually did watch 'the notebook' when i was going through horrible heartbreak.. it's one of my faaavorite movies! it gave me hope that there was better, stronger and real love waiting for me, and even though they were just actors on a screen, it showed me what kind of love i had been missing..
it gave me hope that there was better, stronger and real love waiting for me, and even though they were just actors on a screen, it showed me what kind of love i had been missing..It is one of my favorite movies too, but after I had a "summer love", i can not watch it without thinking of that guy.
but he would never build a house just because he promised me he would, so I maybe I can watch it and hope for a love like that one day
but he would never build a house just because he promised me he would, so I maybe I can watch it and hope for a love like that one day
coyote
Well-known member
