How am I going to live a normal life if my anxiety/symptoms are so overwhelming?

[NickyNacker]

I'm 20 years old and have never had a job or a license or even really done anything since I dropped out in 10th grade back in 2008. I haven't because of my anxiety. Every time I go out in public to do things my physical symptoms of anxiety are so overwhelming that I have to come back home. At first I feel fine but gradually the longer I'm out the worse it gets. I'm not even really consciously thinking anxious or negative thoughts really, the physical symptoms seem to just have a mind of their own and come over me for no reason. I get sweaty, shaky, my eyes feel like they're swollen and it's hard to focus them, I get really nervous.

It's extremely uncomfortable to the point where, like I said, I have to go back home. And once I get home, it's 100 pounds off my shoulders and I'm back to normal in my room away from everything. But it feels like I have 0 control over it and I don't see how I'll ever move out, be independent, get a job, drive myself around. How could I ever do all that with these horrible symptoms that keep me isolated at home??

I've done therapy, I've read books, I feel like I've studied anxiety and what I'm going through as much as I can for the past 3 years and none of it has made the TINIEST difference. So what is there left to do?? I get so depressed because of it that it's unbearable. I came home from the store earlier today and just broke down crying when I got home because it was so hard and I had to leave early. I feel paralyzed and hopeless. I have suicidal thoughts but I would never be able to do it I don't think because I don't want to leave my family and I'm terrified of death. So I just feel stuck. I don't know what to do and I feel like I've completely lost all hope. It just gets worse and worse. I'm supposed to be getting medication this month and if that doesn't help I really don't know what I will do.....

I'm sure I'm not the only one out there feeling this way, but I don't know how other people deal with this.

 

[kihira]

What's the medication you're getting? I found the physical symptoms of anxiety debilitating until I went on beta blockers. They really have turned my life around (+therapy, but I believe the therapy was more effective because I had dealt with the shaking)

 

[NickyNacker]

What's the medication you're getting? I found the physical symptoms of anxiety debilitating until I went on beta blockers. They really have turned my life around (+therapy, but I believe the therapy was more effective because I had dealt with the shaking)

My therapist wants me on an Anti-Depressant and something for sleep because my Anxiety gives me Insomnia which in turn makes my Anxiety worse.

What is a Beta Blocker? *feels stupid*

 

[kihira]

My therapist wants me on an Anti-Depressant and something for sleep because my Anxiety gives me Insomnia which in turn makes my Anxiety worse.

What is a Beta Blocker? *feels stupid*

This gives a good description
"Beta blockers. Beta blockers (such as propranolol, atenolol, nadolol, pindolol and labetolol) reduce blood pressure and slow the heartbeat. They are used mainly to reduce certain anxiety symptoms like palpitations, sweating and tremors, and to control anxiety in public situations. They often are prescribed for individuals with social phobia."
Anxiety Disorders - Health & Wellbeing

 

[NickyNacker]

This gives a good description
"Beta blockers. Beta blockers (such as propranolol, atenolol, nadolol, pindolol and labetolol) reduce blood pressure and slow the heartbeat. They are used mainly to reduce certain anxiety symptoms like palpitations, sweating and tremors, and to control anxiety in public situations. They often are prescribed for individuals with social phobia."
Anxiety Disorders - Health & Wellbeing

Thank you! They don't give a sedated feeling do they? I was on Xanax and that feeling of being sedated made me even more anxious.

Also, do you know what are some prescription names for some Beta Blockers? I'm wondering if I've heard of some and just never knew what it was. I can't find any on google.

 

[Kiwong]

If I was given a beta blocker my heart would beat so slow it would stop. My heart rate only goes up when I am around scary people, or when I run abov 16 km/hr for any lenght of time.

 

[kihira]

If I was given a beta blocker my heart would beat so slow it would stop. My heart rate only goes up when I am around scary people, or when I run abov 16 km/hr for any lenght of time.

Yes, doc has to do a check-up first with these

Thank you! They don't give a sedated feeling do they? I was on Xanax and that feeling of being sedated made me even more anxious.

Also, do you know what are some prescription names for some Beta Blockers? I'm wondering if I've heard of some and just never knew what it was. I can't find any on google.

No sedated feeling at all, in fact I think clearer on them as I don't have my usual anxious buzz. Mine is propranolol, so I guess the other names in that link are other brands

 

[NickyNacker]

No sedated feeling at all, in fact I think clearer on them as I don't have my usual anxious buzz. Mine is propranolol, so I guess the other names in that link are other brands

Thank you for your responses!

 

[deadend]

I've tried Klonopin (Clonazepam), Ativan (Lorazepam), and Inderal (Propranolol).

I'm currently using Klonopin. In the past, I have used Ativan, sometimes in conjunction with Inderal.

Klonopin and Ativan are benzodiazepines. Inderal is a beta blocker. They have different functions. Beta blockers deal with the more immediate physical symptoms, namely adrenaline/heart rate. "Benzodiazepines affect GABA receptors in your brain. They are a sedative that reduce awareness, meaning when anxiety rears up and you become hyper-vigilant, benzos reduce the interaction between those neurotransmitters. Basically, they reduce the activity of your central nervous system."

 

[missjesss]

I would deff give hypnotherapy a try that's what stopped all my physical symptoms!

You need to find an experienced therapist and you have to go deep enough into hypnosis but it only takes practice

 

[carr]

for me, it took a long time to find the right meds to help
me just get past the whole feeling of being overwhelmed all the time
once it was more under control things like, cognative behaviour therapy, and graded exposure helped allot,
but the thing that I think it's most important to know is that it's going to take time and effort but YOU WILL GET THERE
just the fact you can talk to people who understand helps, it's ok if you cant do everything right away

 

[Josette]

Medication is a good step. It will at least take the edge off of the depression and anxiety.

You're only 20 and you have so much ahead of you. Don't give up! You can get through this. I would encourage you to force yourself to go out and do things. It will be terrifying at first but will get easier. Reading about your issues and seeing a therapist are great and very comforting but they can only do so much--you have to take action.

 

[missjesss]

I agree with Josette

I remember when mine was real bad and I forced myself to keep going out and trying to do normal things, but yes you CAN get alot better coz im talking from experience try as many therapies as you can and expose yourself ton feared situations CBT and hypnosis ;p

 

[alanj]

Medication was the first practical step for me, it calmed my mind and I was then not completely overwhelmed and could start functioning. It became more clear to me that it was my thoughts and beliefs that were causing all problems. I then had to start changing them gradually, and then when you are in public situations with this newer thought system it's a bit easier. The more you keep improving your thought system and then test out in public, the better it gets. It's a bit by bit by bit.....process.

 

[NickyNacker]

thank you for all the responses. for the past 3 years i've tried the baby steps and cbt of putting myself out there slowly little by little and i've seen no progress. that's why i feel like i'm at the breaking point and have almost completely lost hope. it's so exhausting, and i just don't know what else to do. i just hope the meds hope at least. idk what i will do if it doesn't. then i'll just feel worse.

 

[Josette]

thank you for all the responses. for the past 3 years i've tried the baby steps and cbt of putting myself out there slowly little by little and i've seen no progress. that's why i feel like i'm at the breaking point and have almost completely lost hope. it's so exhausting, and i just don't know what else to do. i just hope the meds hope at least. idk what i will do if it doesn't. then i'll just feel worse.

Medication can really help but it's not going to magically fix everything. I don't want you to get your hopes up. I do think they'll at least take the edge off and let you think more clearly. That's how they've helped me.

When we're at our worse, feeling overwhelmed, it's really hard to see the good and see any progress we've made. I've been having a meltdown for the past 2 weeks and only starting to see the light and think rationally again today. I was seriously suicidal last week and ranting at my therapist about how nothing's changed in 11 years, even though I know it has (just not enough to satisfy me).

Anyway, I'm wondering if you're at a point where you're so upset that you can't see what progress you've made. You mentioned you're seeing a therapist, yes? Maybe you could talk to her/him to help you see your progress or even just to identify what "progress" is. For example, "now I can do x" or "I've done x three times." I know I tend to "all or nothing" thinking--meaning if I'm not completely cured (i.e. a fearless social butterfly) then I think I've made no progress. I have to remind myself that x years ago I couldn't even speak to people to buy something in a store, for example.

 

[R3K]

you need a few small victories in social situations to give yourself confidence, then your desire to fight the problem will increase, and you'll feel less overwhelmed by the symptoms. Just try walking to the nearest convenience store and buy some snacks and crap while practicing absorbing/deflecting strangers' stares, etc. when you conquer the little convenience store, then challenge yourself to maybe a restaurant or something.

gotta learn how to fight it, reading and researching about anxiety disorder is just the academic part of the picture.

 

[NickyNacker]

you need a few small victories in social situations to give yourself confidence, then your desire to fight the problem will increase, and you'll feel less overwhelmed by the symptoms. Just try walking to the nearest convenience store and buy some snacks and crap while practicing absorbing/deflecting strangers' stares, etc. when you conquer the little convenience store, then challenge yourself to maybe a restaurant or something.

gotta learn how to fight it, reading and researching about anxiety disorder is just the academic part of the picture.

I have had victories, and I have practiced going out many times. That's what I'm saying, I feel like I've been trying for years to get over it and it hasn't gotten any easier. It's kind of gotten worse. Idk

 

[Kat]

I’d suggest maybe start up a hobby or do a course of interest of some sort. I do think sometimes less is more. I feel sometimes if I am not constantly trying to battle and expose myself to situations I have no interest in, I am stronger and are able to do the things I need to do. Constantly fighting wears me down as oppose to making me stronger.