confusedwife
Member
I've been married to a man who, prior to my marrying him, "followed me around like a puppy" to quote everybody who knew us, for 19 years. I knew 3 years in that I could not depend on him for ANY type of emotional support, when first my aunt, then father committed suicide and he was simply not there for me. Not only not there for me, but all but told me to go to my ex for this type of support.
He's been to 4 therapists, one just wanted to teach us to talk to each other. We talk all the time, it's just that most of what he says are lies, so that wasn't helpful. The next, he went by himself for weeks, when she finally asked to see me, I found out that he'd been totally lying to her and now all she wanted to do was mother him. The third found my life so interesting that we accomplished nothing. The newest one seems reasonable and has said my husband has intimacy phobia, which I think his entire family does.
The one thing he's always known I cannot tollerate in my life is lying. Yet he lies about EVERYTHING! The tiniest, dumbest things, that make no difference, all the way to the "yeah, I think the car was stolen" when he knew he didn't pay the bill for so long it was repossessed.
He claims he wants to work on this, claims he wants our marriage to work, but every time I try to trust him again, he starts lying. And he's not even a good liar. This morning, in ONE email, he told 4 lies about the SAME one sentence!!!!
Is there any hope? What can I do? I've always been such a strong woman, but right now I feel totally broken and completely alone!
HELP
He's been to 4 therapists, one just wanted to teach us to talk to each other. We talk all the time, it's just that most of what he says are lies, so that wasn't helpful. The next, he went by himself for weeks, when she finally asked to see me, I found out that he'd been totally lying to her and now all she wanted to do was mother him. The third found my life so interesting that we accomplished nothing. The newest one seems reasonable and has said my husband has intimacy phobia, which I think his entire family does.
The one thing he's always known I cannot tollerate in my life is lying. Yet he lies about EVERYTHING! The tiniest, dumbest things, that make no difference, all the way to the "yeah, I think the car was stolen" when he knew he didn't pay the bill for so long it was repossessed.
He claims he wants to work on this, claims he wants our marriage to work, but every time I try to trust him again, he starts lying. And he's not even a good liar. This morning, in ONE email, he told 4 lies about the SAME one sentence!!!!
Is there any hope? What can I do? I've always been such a strong woman, but right now I feel totally broken and completely alone!
HELP