Having a baby with this problem

missjesss

Banned
Ok so I have found out I am pregnant and I'm deciding whether or not I should keep the baby, do any females on here have a baby with social phobia? I have managed to get my s.a down to a good extent but there are still some elements of it there
 

caringsoul

Banned
if u could do it with your sa and manage to get pregnant .. then i think your confident enough to do other things. and there is already a life living in your belly, no matter how tiny it is. its still alive. its to be honest, a living thing at the moment. and its your child. this is a decision you should make. you can get help from family or friends, and the guy u had it with. i assume he is someone that cares?
 

Mickery

Well-known member
You can't guarantee there'll always be a guy to help. What is it that is most concerning you?
 

mmmm

Well-known member
Jess, please don't let SA be the boss of this decision. SA spends all day telling me horrid lies about myself. If keeping the baby is not the right thing for you right now then don't do it but if SA is your only concern, well, I would hate you to have regrets over something like this.
 

gazelle

Well-known member
If the father of the baby is willing to accept and share the responsibility I think you should keep the child, but if he's not that type of person considering the fact that since you have SA working might drain a lot of your energy, I think it's going to be a very tough challenge to raise the baby as a single parent.
 

missjesss

Banned
Thanks for all your opinions, I am leaning towards not keeping it because I don't think me and my parter are ready for it but at the same time I feel sad because I have a living thing inside me and it would be nice but yeah I guess in a way s.a is saying no :/
 

Waybuloo

Well-known member
I have social phobia and I have a toddler. My SA doesn't get in the way of being a parent really. The problems are there regardless. I have a supporting partner and I can imagine it's difficult being on your own. I am glad I kept my baby because i've matured because of it and put me on the right path - I was really aimless, indecisive and self obsessed and am no longer that person.

That's just my experience though and I don't want to persuade you to go one way or another. Only you and your partner know whether you guys are ready. You might decide to not have it for now but when it comes to the time of termination or abortion, you might change your mind, it's known to have happened. You just have to go with what you feel.

This is a tough decision regardless of mental problems. Also keep in mind that if you do have a termination, it might reduce your change of having a pregnancy later on in life. I think you might want to write down pros and cons and look at it on paper to give you a clearer picture.
 

missjesss

Banned
Waybuloo

Thank you so much for your input .. a work colleague said exactly the same thing to me (mind you she deff does not have s.a) but the words that hit me from what you said are "feeling aimless, indecisive and self obsessed" that matches me right now! I do wonder if by having a baby maybe I will get outside of myself a lot more and put someone else before me (which might even help to cure this even more) I'm going to do the list of pros and cons ... how old is ur baby? :)
 
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