I've had a lot of boyfriends. It's ironic, really. Even compared to people without SA, I've had many more boyfriends.
Only two were serious (lasting a 9 months to a year), but those two were severely screwed up. I was actually engaged to one of them, until he beat me. He thought I was acting like a whore at one of his parties, so he beat me in front of everyone and called my best friend crying about it. I was an idiot, went back to him, and he repeated that basic scenario several times. I ended up in the hospital twice.
Not quite all it's cracked up to be.
Shouldn't have gone back to him, but he was my only friend, my first love, and the only person who seemed to really understand me until he took "a turn for the worse".
The other serious boyfriend landed me in the county prison because he also beat me and when I fought back he called the authorities. He was more calm than me (I was rather shaken up and scared and - of course - I have SA so I clammed up and panicked) so I was arrested. My trial begins the day after tomorrow, and this happened six months ago.
My most recent boyfriend was one of the most "popular" guys that I went to school with. He asked me out right after I got out of the above terrible relationship, but after a few weeks, maybe a month, I realized I couldn't handle a relationship... and he decided at about the same time that I had been "too damaged". We mutually agreed to just stop seeing each other, though I was secretly very pissed that he had the nerve to call me "damaged" and I hope to never see him again.
I'd say wait until you find someone truly amazing, but my fiance was truly amazing. He snapped when things got complicated, though, 2 and a half years later. So now I can only say, be cautious and don't just date because you feel that it's something you "should" have done by now or "should" currently be doing.
: I too want to get married, and I would do anything to please my wife, if it were to ever happen that is... Dare to dream.
