For all the guys who keep getting stuck in the "friendzone"...

[Jay Cataldo]

Ugh I hate the Dog Whisperer. What a moron. It's really weird how animal techniques can work on humans. Karen Pryor's Don't Shoot the Dog book is amazing. I do a lot of dog training and I sometimes realize that I treat children like dogs lol. The scariest part is it actually works!

Why do you think he's a moron?

 

[Richey]

this was great for a laugh!

i mean its funny but not realistic for the most part, its to forced and desperate, its like people using pick up lines, it makes it bluntly obvious they want a shag, how about making friends then seeing where it goes first, find out about their sense of humour and interests and use some class, eh!?

 

[Jay Cataldo]

this was great for a laugh!

i mean its funny but not realistic for the most part, its to forced and desperate, its like people using pick up lines, it makes it bluntly obvious they want a shag

What's not "realistic" about what I wrote?

Yes, it might come off as "forced" if the guy is not used to acting like an attractive man and uses this material to overcompensate. But how is it like "people using pickup lines?"

And acting like an attractive, dominant man makes it "bluntly obvious that the guy wants a shag"? How so?

From a woman's point of view, the guy who does the opposite of what I suggest (i.e. acts shy, anxious and submissive) is the one making it obvious he wants a shag. She's thinking: "Why is this guy acting all nervous and weird around me? He must want something from me."

And even if it is bluntly obvious, who cares? What's wrong with letting a woman think that we want to shag her? Wouldn't trying to keep it a secret come off as "forced and desperate"? lol

Now just in case you skimmed through the post, let me recap my points:

1. Don't let a woman walk all over you
2. Praise your woman's accomplishments often
3. Don't let her drag you around like a little boy
4. Don't be nice/kiss her ass when she's not treating you well
5. Take the lead (plan dates/adventures, be decisive, have a "plan" for the relationship, etc.)

What is "desperate" about any of this?

how about making friends then seeing where it goes first, find out about their sense of humour and interests and use some class, eh!?

There's nothing wrong with making friends, but if there's nothing attractive about your behavior, then you get stuck in the friendzone from which no light can escape. lol If you act like an attractive man, then you can parlay your new friendship into something more, if you so choose.

And why are you implying that what I'm talking about displays a lack of "class?" You're throwing a lot of words around but I'm not exactly sure what you're talking about.

 

[Ajuna24]

Now just in case you skimmed through the post, let me recap my points:

1. Don't let a woman walk all over you
2. Praise your woman's accomplishments often
3. Don't let her drag you around like a little boy
4. Don't be nice/kiss her ass when she's not treating you well
5. Take the lead (plan dates/adventures, be decisive, have a "plan" for the relationship, etc.)

I say If being yourself isn't good enough for her, she's not good enough for you.

Just work on overcoming your shyness, bad self-esteem and dependence.

Have a little faith in yourself and you'll find your way.

 

[Jay Cataldo]

I say If being yourself isn't good enough for her, she's not good enough for you.

Just work on overcoming your shyness, bad self-esteem and dependence.

Have a little faith in yourself and you'll find your way.

I have no idea if you're agreeing or disagreeing, but you quoted a piece of what I said, so I'm going to guess that you disagree.

You say that a guy should just "be himself," but then you suggest that he works on overcoming his issues. Doesn't that imply that he's not "good enough" just the way he is?

And lets pretend that you're dating a guy who is just being himself, but happens to do everything wrong (calls you 100 times a day, ogles other women in front of you and makes perverted sexual comments in front of your mom). If you decide not to see him again, does this automatically make YOU not good enough for him?

It's these kinds of comments that convince lonely guys to avoid examining their behaviors, even when "being themselves" hasn't gotten them a single date their entire lives. Nobody should have to change their entire personality, but it's a good idea to learn how to display your current personality in an interesting and attractive way if you want women to pay attention to you.

But regardless, how is "overcoming your shyness, bad self-esteem and dependence" any different than what I'm suggesting? Won't a guy naturally start acting in the way I suggest once he overcomes his shyness, bad self-esteem and dependence issues? Maybe we're both on the same page here.

 

[gsmax5]

I put up a new post on my blog about how you can learn to be more attractive to women by watching "The Dog Whisperer."

Check it out HERE

Haha, funny. I'm going to have to check that out.

 

[Riiya]

Yes, it might come off as "forced" if the guy is not used to acting like an attractive man and uses this material to overcompensate. But how is it like "people using pickup lines?"

It's not. Pick-up lines can at least help you break the ice with a woman.

From a woman's point of view, the guy who does the opposite of what I suggest (i.e. acts shy, anxious and submissive) is the one making it obvious he wants a shag. She's thinking: "Why is this guy acting all nervous and weird around me? He must want something from me."

Not really. From a woman's point of view (i.e., mine), a guy who is acting like someone he's not is the one making it obvious he wants a shag. If you're naturally dominant, fine. If you're naturally shy, that's fine too. Neither is more or less attractive than the other as there are a lot of factors that make someone attractive (you know us women - we can never give you a straightforward answer as to what we want). I personally have never been attracted to a dude who goes around reading/writing articles on attracting women with a straight face, but that's just me.

And even if it is bluntly obvious, who cares? What's wrong with letting a woman think that we want to shag her?

That the chance of you getting what you want anytime soon is not good.

Now just in case you skimmed through the post, let me recap my points:

1. Don't let a woman walk all over you
2. Praise your woman's accomplishments often
3. Don't let her drag you around like a little boy
4. Don't be nice/kiss her ass when she's not treating you well
5. Take the lead (plan dates/adventures, be decisive, have a "plan" for the relationship, etc.)

What is "desperate" about any of this?

It's your title, dude. Watch “The Dog Whisperer” and Become Irresistible to Women. That strongly reeks of desperation to me.

There's nothing wrong with making friends, but if there's nothing attractive about your behavior, then you get stuck in the friendzone from which no light can escape. lol If you act like an attractive man, then you can parlay your new friendship into something more, if you so choose.

"Acting" is the key word here - it just doesn't work because it's not who you are. Anyway, the woman you want for "something more" is the one who likes you no matter how unattractive you think you are compared to David Beckham. Unless you have a tendency to pick your nose in public and punch every old lady you see on the street, I don't see why you should conform to someone else's standard for attractiveness.

And why are you implying that what I'm talking about displays a lack of "class?" You're throwing a lot of words around but I'm not exactly sure what you're talking about.

You're comparing a woman to a dog. I don't know what Richey meant, but it doesn't show much class to me.

You say that a guy should just "be himself," but then you suggest that he works on overcoming his issues. Doesn't that imply that he's not "good enough" just the way he is?

There's a fine difference between overcoming your issues for personal growth and changing your natural behavior to become attractive to women.

And lets pretend that you're dating a guy who is just being himself, but happens to do everything wrong (calls you 100 times a day, ogles other women in front of you and makes perverted sexual comments in front of your mom). If you decide not to see him again, does this automatically make YOU not good enough for him?

Wow, he's like that dude who picks his nose in public and punches every old lady on the street. What he needs to do now is tell me how he's still alive and hasn't been permanently locked up - and how he got that girl to date him to begin with (assuming he hasn't run across your blog or a thousand other articles online on how to be more attractive to women).

Of course, what we both cited are extreme cases, much like the dogs on the Dog Whisperer show. Most people on this forum know enough common sense not to do certain things in front of other people. In fact, I recall one of the problems with having social anxiety is that you tend to be self-conscious of your every move and end up doing mostly nothing.

It's these kinds of comments that convince lonely guys to avoid examining their behaviors, even when "being themselves" hasn't gotten them a single date their entire lives. Nobody should have to change their entire personality, but it's a good idea to learn how to display your current personality in an interesting and attractive way if you want women to pay attention to you.

You know, the reason people keep saying "be yourself" is because it works. The problem seems to be that many people don't know who they are and have no idea what it means to be themselves. This is where self-actualization comes in. I'm all for displaying your current personality in an interesting and attractive way, but do it because it's who you are and not because you want women to pay attention to you. Relying on approvals from others when you can barely approve of yourself is a recipe for future unhappiness.

But regardless, how is "overcoming your shyness, bad self-esteem and dependence" any different than what I'm suggesting? Won't a guy naturally start acting in the way I suggest once he overcomes his shyness, bad self-esteem and dependence issues? Maybe we're both on the same page here.

Not really. Your suggestion seems more like a quick but temporary fix for one of your many problems (e.g., inability to date women), whereas Ajuna's suggestion tells you to examine the root of the problems (e.g., lack of self-worth, social anxiety) and find a way to get over it. But if you think the end justifies the means, then it's your call.

 

[SickJoke]

LOL Thanks for the warning, my friend. I'm sure you know that the unconscious mind is designed to keep our beliefs systems in place which is why people get incredibly angry when one of their deeply held beliefs is challenged. Unfortunately, most people are scared of the truth, since it pulls them out of the imaginary fairy-tale world they live in and usually leads to irrational, un-constructive shit-talking.

I'm still waiting for someone to point out what specifically they don't agree with, as opposed to making vague statements such as "I can't completely deny there's ANY truth in it."

Yes! Gotta cling to those precious beliefs! Basically their argument comes down to this every time, without fail:

"It's wrong to improve your skills with women."
Why is it wrong?
"Because it just is!"

That's usually when I get the urge to yell something like:

"YOU ****ING MINDLESS SHEEP LISTEN TO THE LOGIC BEHIND WHAT IM SAYING!" Then I press the button on my morphine drip and I calm down.

So I'm impressed with your calm articulation. You're a lot better at this than I am. I'm enjoying this little verbal boxing match. This is like Muhammad Ali vs Carrot Top and his posse. I'm bobbin and weavin on the sidelines rootin for you. Anyway I'll shut up now, please continue

 

[TheNewZero]

Why do you think he's a moron?

Mmmm....you're going to send me off on a rant lol. Basically, you can't train a dog in an hour, which is what he makes it seem. And he uses alpha roles which is just stupid. And he labels 90% of the dogs 'dominant' which 1) they aren't and 2) isn't as common as people would like to think. Okay stopping myself...now.

One more thing: scare tactics can really mess a dog up. Okay done.

 

[licorice]

I think the message that Jay is trying to convey here is positive cause its instinctual,its just part of our subconscious whether we care to admit it or not,and Im a woman...However,I am not crazy about the dog reference as it does seem demeaning(though the intention was not to demean).I also do not condone someone changing who they are but we can all use some pointers to perhaps facilitate interactions with the opposite sex while still being yourself for the most part...I think anything that is too forced will backfire,it has to be who you are or who you want to become...And that list of 5 points can go both ways as I am an adult just like my partner is and we should treat each as such not one controlling the other and whatnot...But as I said its instincts and the man does have to take a bit more of the lead but within reason..Jay,alert me when the come up with "The Cat Whisperer"

 

[Jay Cataldo]

First off, I find it amusing that you say this type of discussion doesn't belong on this board, and then you write me back a 10 page response. lol

It's not. Pick-up lines can at least help you break the ice with a woman.

And you're implying what? That this stuff has less value than using canned pick-up lines? Really? How so?

Not really. From a woman's point of view (i.e., mine), a guy who is acting like someone he's not is the one making it obvious he wants a shag. If you're naturally dominant, fine. If you're naturally shy, that's fine too. Neither is more or less attractive than the other as there are a lot of factors that make someone attractive (you know us women - we can never give you a straightforward answer as to what we want).

You're not even addressing my main points, just attacking my examples, but ok... Lets say a guy reads my post, lands a date with you, and then compliments you on your accomplishments, or calmly calls you out on something you did that he felt was rude.... you're saying you would instantly know that "he wasn't being himself"? How would you be able to tell that this wasn't his natural way of communicating?

So you're saying it's a mistake to consider modifying one of your behaviors if it's not getting you the desired results? So women should stop reading Cosmo and books like "Why Men Love Bitches" or "He's Just Not That Into You" since they all give advice on how to modify your behaviors to become more attractive to men? Cool... let's go burn down a Barnes and Nobles.

I personally have never been attracted to a dude who goes around reading/writing articles on attracting women with a straight face, but that's just me.

That's why it's a mistake for guys to discuss this stuff with their dates, just as it's weird and awkward for a girl to say "I read this article in cosmo about how I should kiss you for 4.6 seconds and then pull away to leave you wanting more. Oh, and as much as I want to have sex tonight, the article said if I make you wait 3 weeks, you won't think I'm a slut so I'll have a better chance of becoming your girlfriend."

And how do you know you've never been attracted to a guy who "reads/writes article on attracting women"? Do you perform a background check on all your bf's to make sure they've never read one of these alleged articles? Do you have psychic powers?

And just because you're not attracted to men who attempt to better their understanding of women, it doesn't mean that all women share the same opinion.

Note to guys: If you read my article, you now have a 0% chance of scoring with Riiya. I deeply apologize for this.

That the chance of you getting what you want anytime soon is not good.

Hmmm... I let all my dates know up front that I think they're sexy as hell and if I got them alone, I would probably do bad things to them. But for some reason, I never have trouble "getting what I want." Well, maybe I'll try it your way.

Note to guys: From now on, you must deceive all women by hiding your sexual desires at all costs or you will not "get what you want anytime soon." Women do NOT enjoy sex like we do, so if your date thinks you want sex, you'll never get past first base... EVER. So deny, deny, deny... and if she calls you out on it point blank... then quickly tell her you're gay and that girls are yucky.

It's your title, dude. Watch “The Dog Whisperer” and Become Irresistible to Women. That strongly reeks of desperation to me.

I can almost understand your point, but you're not being clear. What makes it "reek of desperation"? Maybe you're implying that I'm so desperate to have people read my stuff that I came up with a catchy title (that's admittedly a bit silly, but so am I)? If I called the post, "5 things you should do on dates" would it have made it less "desperate?" I still don't get what you're trying to say.

Regardless, someone implied that the content was "desperate"... I asked for clarification, and you chime in to say the title is desperate. Regardless of how ridiculous the title is, what bearing does it have on whether or not the content is "desperate"?

"Acting" is the key word here - it just doesn't work because it's not who you are. Anyway, the woman you want for "something more" is the one who likes you no matter how unattractive you think you are compared to David Beckham.

Ok, so how do unattractive guys who have no social skills, never leave their houses, hate to bathe and are petrified of talking to women, going to find this special girl who wants them in spite of all their shortcomings? Does this magical girl exist? I'm sure she does. But are the odds of finding her in his favor? Probly not.

Again, this is like saying that changing your hair style, wearing makeup, being sweet on a date (instead of negative and bitchy) and not sleeping with the guy as quickly as you might like to is "acting." But really... why rag on a guy for trying to better himself and increase the amount of women that find him attractive?

And how does learning how to be more attractive prevent a guy from "being himself"? I've always looked for ways to become more attractive since I was a kid, so for me, learning and implementing this material IS being myself. Plus, I'm a life coach. So helping other people any way I can IS being myself. And if someone reads my article and decides to start becoming more decisive, for instance, how does that make him any less "himself"?

Unless you have a tendency to pick your nose in public and punch every old lady you see on the street, I don't see why you should conform to someone else's standard for attractiveness.

And I'm guessing you've never learned how to dress/do hair/makeup from other attractive women? I agree that a person should go ahead and tattoo their whole face if it makes them happy, but if the majority of the population doesn't find that attractive, then shouldn't be surprised if they have trouble finding that one special person who likes them just the way they are. The real world isn't fair.

And fyi, the majority of women on this planet will respond positively to the behaviors I brought up. Do you really think the guy who naturally does the OPPOSITE of what I suggest:

1. Let's a woman walk all over him
2. Never praises her accomplishments
3. Let's her drag him around like a little boy
4. Kisses her ass when she treats him poorly
5. Never leads or makes any decisions in the relationship

... is going to have a good chance of attracting and KEEPING a girlfriend? Maybe YOU like guys who act like this, but all the women I have ever talked to are seriously turned off by this behavior and the result is... THE FRIENDZONE... from which no light can escape. :: (Noca... you rock lol)

Unless of course, a woman has serious control issues and takes pleasure from being able to dominate her men physically and emotionally. I could understand how a woman in this category would disagree with everything I'm saying.

You're comparing a woman to a dog. I don't know what Richey meant, but it doesn't show much class to me.

I showed that there are parallels between how Cesar Millan acts with dogs and how a dominant man acts with women. And guess what? This stuff works on men, as well. Classical Conditioning (ring the bell... dog salivates) also works on both men and women. So what's the big deal? And where is the lack of class? Saying "women are dogs and should be treated the same way" is different than saying "you can modify some of the techniques that dogs respond to and use them to make your woman feel good."

Attack me all you want, but if all you got from my post was that I think women should be treated like dogs, then you're just seeing what you want to see.

There's a fine difference between overcoming your issues for personal growth and changing your natural behavior to become attractive to women.

Really? If your issue is say, letting women walk all over you, wouldn't "overcoming your issue" involve learning in part how to calmly assert yourself which would in essence be a "change from your original/natural behavior"? What is this "fine difference?"

Of course, what we both cited are extreme cases, much like the dogs on the Dog Whisperer show. Most people on this forum know enough common sense not to do certain things in front of other people. In fact, I recall one of the problems with having social anxiety is that you tend to be self-conscious of your every move and end up doing mostly nothing.

So your solution is to convince guys to act the same way they always have but expect a different result?

You know, the reason people keep saying "be yourself" is because it works. The problem seems to be that many people don't know who they are and have no idea what it means to be themselves. This is where self-actualization comes in. I'm all for displaying your current personality in an interesting and attractive way, but do it because it's who you are and not because you want women to pay attention to you. Relying on approvals from others when you can barely approve of yourself is a recipe for future unhappiness.

If "be yourself" worked, then every guy on this board would be in a satisfying relationship. There's much more to it.

I agree that most people don't know who they are or what it means to be themselves. But what does this have to do with the content of my post?

What do you mean by "relying on approval from others?" How does what I suggest imply that a man should rely on approval from others? The point of the post was to teach how to create attraction... not how to get women "to approve" of you. Most women might "disapprove" of these behaviors but become attracted to the man that performs them. Two different things.

And didn't you say in a previous post that you were going to change your flirting style because girls were calling you a slut and it made you uncomfortable? Aren't you seeking approval from others in this case? Does this automatically make you a bad person or just someone who is attempting to better one of her life situations?

Not really. Your suggestion seems more like a quick but temporary fix for one of your many problems (e.g., inability to date women), whereas Ajuna's suggestion tells you to examine the root of the problems (e.g., lack of self-worth, social anxiety) and find a way to get over it. But if you think the end justifies the means, then it's your call.

Yes, this is a "quick fix" since truly getting over those problems can take years of therapy, whereas you can use this stuff immediately and see results. So what's wrong with guys working on pieces of their behavior in the meantime? Are you saying it's wrong for a guy who always slouches and stares at the ground when walking to force himself to sit up straight? Yes, he could go to therapy to fix his low self-esteem/depression until he naturally stands in a more confident manner... but why not do both? I can tell you from my personal experience of working with hundreds of clients, that you get much faster results if you work on both sides of the coin simultaneously.

Anyways, I find it interesting that everybody comes out of the woodwork to personally attack me but nobody has addressed what "specifically" they find to be false or inaccurate about my post. And Riiya, it sounds like you have some serious beef with anyone who tries to help guys solve their dating/relationship problems, so I won't take what you said personally.

 

[Jay Cataldo]

Yes! Gotta cling to those precious beliefs! Basically their argument comes down to this every time, without fail:

"It's wrong to improve your skills with women."
Why is it wrong?
"Because it just is!"

That's usually when I get the urge to yell something like:

"YOU ****ING MINDLESS SHEEP LISTEN TO THE LOGIC BEHIND WHAT IM SAYING!" Then I press the button on my morphine drip and I calm down.

So I'm impressed with your calm articulation. You're a lot better at this than I am. I'm enjoying this little verbal boxing match. This is like Muhammad Ali vs Carrot Top and his posse. I'm bobbin and weavin on the sidelines rootin for you. Anyway I'll shut up now, please continue

LOL Thanks, man. I was really hoping someone would actually address the content of my article, and not just lash out in anger, but we both know that's probably not going to happen.

Regardless, I'll gladly deal with 500 haters taking cheap shots as long as ONE guy gets the message and uses the material to change his life.

But yeah, the morphine drip sounds like a plan. How bout I trade ya some of my fentanyl lollipops?

 

[Argamemnon]

First, this is not directed to any of you. I refuse to change or act differently around women. I'm good enough the way I am. I don't like to talk that much for example, (unless it's a subject I'm interested in), but I'm not going to force myself to talk more. If some woman doesn't like quiet men, then I wouldn't want to have anything to do with her.

I have nothing against women by the way, don't get me wrong. The same applies to men, if they don't like quiet guys, and choose not to befriend me because of this, they can go to hell. You can certainly better yourself and modify certain behaviors, but you can't change the essence of who you are.

 

[j_brown2]

I don't understand the anger of some people on here. You all scared of the truth that woman like dominant, assertive, confident guys coz you all are the opposite?

 

[Argamemnon]

Frankly, I don't care what women want. What matters is what I want, and my own life values. I have never been interested in how the "majority" of people act or what they want. I'm not a sheep.

 

[j_brown2]

Frankly, I don't care what women want. What matters is what I want, and my own life values. I have never been interested in how the "majority" of people act or what they want. I'm not a sheep.

Good, are you doing CBT? a bit to hard i meant?

 

[Lea]

Frankly, I don't care what women want. What matters is what I want, and my own life values. I have never been interested in how the "majority" of people act or what they want. I'm not a sheep.

That sounds rather like selfishness to me...

 

[Havocan]

There's nothing about my post that negates politeness. Sometimes, just being polite isn't enough, as I'm sure you already realize. And yes, if the behaviors were already a natural part of everyone's repertoire, I wouldn't have wasted my time trying to explain this stuff.

I didn't say you wrote anything rude.

But how is this: "I'd rather go for good, old-fashioned politeness where I'm still the one in charge." any different than what I wrote? Please point out what isn't "polite" about what I recommended.

How it is different? I don't compare girls' and guys' behaviroural pattern to a dog's. We're perhaps animals, but we're civilised animals, first and foremost using our intelligence over the instinct. Your post indicates that we should look at girls as some kind of a "problem" we need to deal with like males deal with before they go mate. In other words, the tone and the language you use in your post means you see the girls as animals and not humans. That isn't polite in my opinion.

 

[Jay Cataldo]

How it is different? I don't compare girls' and guys' behaviroural pattern to a dog's.

What's wrong with comparing our behavioral patterns to those of animals? There are hundreds of things humans have in common with dogs, giraffes, polar bears, rats, etc. Would pharmaceutical companies test their drugs out on animals before starting human trials if there were no similarities? What's wrong with making these comparisons if they help increase your understanding of the human condition?

We're perhaps animals, but we're civilised animals, first and foremost using our intelligence over the instinct.

So EVERYBODY ALWAYS uses their intelligence over their instinct? Really? Just because we all have the capacity to do so doesn't mean we always exercise that capacity. Plus, I'm not so sure it's a good idea to stop examining our instinctual behaviors simply because we COULD override them with intelligence. And seriously, how many people do you know of who ALWAYS override their instincts with logical, unemotional decisions, especially in their romantic relationships (and aren't psychopathic like Dexter)?

Your post indicates that we should look at girls as some kind of a "problem" we need to deal with like males deal with before they go mate.

My post doesn't indicate GIRLS are the problem. The problem the post attempts to address is the frustration of constantly getting stuck in the friendzone and having no idea why. If you've never experienced this "problem" yourself, then you couldn't possibly understand how difficult it is to deal with.

For those who are looking for a way to solve this problem, I feel that modifying their own behavior is a better solution than coming to the conclusion that women are completely messed up, and then going on a message board to post nasty, hate-fueled comments about how unfairly they get treated by the opposite sex.

In other words, the tone and the language you use in your post means you see the girls as animals and not humans. That isn't polite in my opinion.

I would love to hear how you came to the conclusion that "I see all women as animals and not humans". Does my tone and language really "mean" that your accusations are true, or are these accusations just your own personal opinions which aren't backed up by facts?

Insulting me by attacking my character doesn't add any weight to your argument, in addition to being a surprising choice of behavior coming from someone who seems to value politeness as highly as you do.

And I'm curious.... do you realize how offensive your statement is to someone such as myself who devotes a large portion of his time to teaching men and women how to have satisfying relationships? Maybe when your anger subsides and you're able to actually use your INTELLIGENCE to override your INSTINCT to lash out at me, you'll be man enough to apologize.

Again, I'm still waiting for someone to actually address the content of my post in a calm, intelligent manner instead of making wild accusations or generalizations about my thoughts, beliefs or character.

Please look over the following list one more time...

1. Don't let a woman walk all over you
2. Praise your woman's accomplishments often
3. Don't let her drag you around like a little boy
4. Don't be nice/kiss her ass when she's not treating you well
5. Take the lead (plan dates/adventures, be decisive, have a "plan" for the relationship, etc.)

...and then explain why you think this is bad advice.

 

[Havocan]

First off, I'm not at all letting out my anger at you, I'm simply just stating my opinion on the subject and critcising your methods. The one who seems to let his instinct control his mind seems to be you, not me, so calm down and don't act like a child. I've done nothing wrong, I'm not insulting you or your character {wherever that one came from?} and I certainly won't apologise. If you find critics offensive you should go back to elementary school and start all over again on how to debate.

I'd in fact suggest you stop using the straw man's arguments. That list in the bottom of your post are good advises, and I've not described them as "bad advice", so stop putting words in my mouth. Are you man enough to realise this childish way of debating?

I think you know what I mean when talking about intelligence over instincts. We don't drag a pretty girl back to our hideouts and shag her just because she's attractive. We don't challenge other guys to a fight where the winner take them all. We act like humans, talk, impress, make jokes, stories, use body language to gain a girl's attention, hence the fact that we use our intelligence. Or at least should use our intelligence, first and foremost.

All in all I'm addressing the very content of your post: to use the tactics and skills a male dog uses to control his bitch, then transform it into human methods.