thegunners21
Well-known member
People are pretty indifferent towards to me. I don't think a single soul is aware of my existence in my university. lol.
Do you scare women?
- Thread starter One_minus_one
- Start date
Well, there was this one time when these 2 girls were walking toward me from a distance and I heard one girl tell her friend to ask me a question (i think it was if i knew where this guy was or something) But the girl rejected, because she thought i going to think she likes me. So, I know what you mean when you said their scared
MikeyC
Well-known member
It's what's inside that counts, right?
One_minus_one
Member
Wow... does anyone take anything seriously here? Most of the responses were bulls**t. I kinda find that rude when someone asks a serious question and people start goofing off. WHy would you come to a social anxiety website to kill time?
HHDisturbed
Well-known member
I am guessing that people wit SA must have more time to kill. But were you looking for just a yes or no answer? If so my answer is: no, because I am good at making others smile or laugh with small talk. This usually diffuses any tension and makes me appear non-threatening to the opposite sex.
Steppen-Wolf
Well-known member
It's actually the complete opposite for me, every single friend I've ever had was a girl. But I feel really uncomfortable around other men.
I think you're just insecure around women, specially because you're not used to them. You don't have the experience to know how to aproach women.
But then again, it could all just be in your head and women are not reacting in any particular negative way to you. If you have SA or something similar then this is very likely.
I think you're just insecure around women, specially because you're not used to them. You don't have the experience to know how to aproach women.
But then again, it could all just be in your head and women are not reacting in any particular negative way to you. If you have SA or something similar then this is very likely.
It's both a support site, and to a certain extend a community. While I agree that humour shouldn't get in the way of the actual help, I do think that light heartedness is vital for the community.
Before I came here for support/information I was on a depression forum where there was nothing but seriousness and information. And the forum actually ended up accelerating my problems.
Try not to take it too personal. While it may seem disrespectful, it's never meant to be.
HHDisturbed
Well-known member
Aren't the best people in our lives the one's who accept us for who we are, quirks and all? Everyone has quirks of some sort and to different degrees. So in turn everyone needs to be more accepting of each other's individualities. It sure would make for a happier world to live in.
Odo
Banned
Oh hey, I forgot to post about myself.
I would say that I probably do not scare women... I definitely don't look like a scary person. But I do put them off, because I get really nervous about things. Even if they also have the same problems, I've noticed that women tend to be more demanding about things like being confident and assertive and capable... and even though I wish I could be that way, I can't do it and I don't know why. I actually feel sorry for girls who do find me attractive, and just assume it's because they're missing/haven't seen whatever is putting everyone else off yet.
I'd like to believe it's because I'm just so hot that no one feels good enough but that's absurd... the problem is that I shut out the outside world as much as I can and I can even get into moods where I just want to give up on everything around me and dismiss it as unworthy of my participation or alternatively dismiss myself as a complete failure at life. I'm sure that my appearance reflects this... things like posture and facial expression and a flat way of speaking.
SA isn't a romantic psychological problem like manic depression or something where you have ups and downs or are cleverly manipulative and successful... it's probably the most annoying mental illness there is.
I would say that I probably do not scare women... I definitely don't look like a scary person. But I do put them off, because I get really nervous about things. Even if they also have the same problems, I've noticed that women tend to be more demanding about things like being confident and assertive and capable... and even though I wish I could be that way, I can't do it and I don't know why. I actually feel sorry for girls who do find me attractive, and just assume it's because they're missing/haven't seen whatever is putting everyone else off yet.
I'd like to believe it's because I'm just so hot that no one feels good enough but that's absurd... the problem is that I shut out the outside world as much as I can and I can even get into moods where I just want to give up on everything around me and dismiss it as unworthy of my participation or alternatively dismiss myself as a complete failure at life. I'm sure that my appearance reflects this... things like posture and facial expression and a flat way of speaking.
SA isn't a romantic psychological problem like manic depression or something where you have ups and downs or are cleverly manipulative and successful... it's probably the most annoying mental illness there is.
They certainly are. I feel there are many people who don't know how to appreciate acceptance of other people and their quirks as a truly positive trait like honesty and reliability are, but I'd go as far as to say it's far more important and honourable than both of those.
Maybe it's because I'm ''weird'' and generally feel the heavy contrast when I'm treated like a regular person, but I can't help but idolize people that don't seem to notice quirks at all.
Opaline
1
Ah, yes. Going a bit off topic here, but this stood out to me. I've long felt... frustrated by this, I guess. Not because I want people to think I'm some mentally ill martyr hero (like the depressed genius or the tragically flawed hero or whatever; the romanticization - that word is in my dictionary by the way - of certain mental disorders as you said), but because in general people seem to understand/have more of a tolerance for/more compassion for depression, schizophrenia, eating disorders, etc. Depression does often get a bad rap as well, but I'd argue it is still far more acceptable to struggle with depression than it is to have social phobia. Depression is now being seen as more of a real illness/something out of the victim's control, whereas social phobia is seen as a personality disorder because of how it manifests itself.
I have never felt comfortable admitting my social phobia to anyone outside of immediate family and mental health workers. I don't go around telling everyone about my depression, but the thought of revealing that I struggle with it is far less scary and uncomfortable (and embarrassing) than admitting I have social anxiety.
This is why I want to become an advocate for the disorder. That of course would mean I would have to basically "come out" to a large group of people about my own struggle with it, so I don't know if/when that will ever happen *le sigh*
Anyway, back to the topic...
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Subpop
Well-known member
I don't think people have much tolerance for Schizophrenia and I personally have never come across any 'romanticisation of mental illness'. Despite a growing awareness that Depression is a disease not unlike Diabetes or MS or Epilepsy for some people, I am of the opinion that there is still a huge stigmatization attached to mental illness in Australian society....especially with employers.
I could explain to people that I am extremely shy way more readily than I could explain that I manage a Depressive illness.
I could explain to people that I am extremely shy way more readily than I could explain that I manage a Depressive illness.
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Odo
Banned
EDIT: Actually, forget it... I don't want this to turn into one of those 'who has it worse' things when that wasn't even my point. Plus, all of those images really disrupted the thread.
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Opaline
1
Maybe it's different in Australia, then - I'm from the USA. It may even vary here as well, by region, demographic, etc.