Cant make convo's last long!

bitingthepea

Well-known member
I frustrate myself because i can't really make conversations last long!, probably because i don't say enough but i've been studying people having conversations (geeky i no lol) and why can they have a great laugh/talk and i cant!!

Maybe because im not comfortable with myself and my anxiety is sky high??
 

gummybear22

Well-known member
sometimes it's difficult to find others with the same interests as you and people who are willing to talk about stuff in general. i've got some online people i can talk with, one for a looooong time, and don't talk long to any of my class friends.

what stuff interests you?
 

Dariushka

Well-known member
I can't either.. I wonder how I finished schools and got jobs. Strike of luck or split personality. Dunno..
 
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Luka

Well-known member
I can't with people I'm not comfortable with so pretty much 98% of people I know. When I am comfortable with that person I somehow literally talk about anything and everything. Strange, really.
 

Ithior

Well-known member
I can't with people I'm not comfortable with so pretty much 98% of people I know. When I am comfortable with that person I somehow literally talk about anything and everything. Strange, really.

I'm like that too.
 

Oizys

Well-known member
It's funny, conversing is easier for me online than in person. In person I've a horrible time keeping a conversation alive. Most of my old friends talked enough for my involvement to not really matter, which is one of the reasons we're no longer friends.
 

Dariushka

Well-known member
"Most of my old friends talked enough for my involvement to not really matter"


They have zero empathy levels. It's a survival game and pecking order once the first one seems won..
 

5arah

Well-known member
I definitely rely on the other person to carry the conversation when talking to someone I'm not close too. Actually sometimes with family and friends as well. Asking the other person questions helps some. Keeps them talking.
 
I also have trouble having conversations. It's just that...it seems they choose the topics I am the least interested to talk about. Also the ones I don't know anything about like...sports.
 

LazyHermitCrab

Well-known member
Yeah it's hard when our minds are racing. Sometimes a conversation will actually have potential to flow, but I feel this fight or flight response and I find an easy way to stop the conversation and run lol. I recommend videojug.com. There's short videos about random topics you can talk about.
 

MikeyC

Well-known member
Maybe because im not comfortable with myself and my anxiety is sky high??
Sounds like you answered your own question! You don't feel comfortable in your own skin, so you doubt your ability to have a good conversation, even if the conversation was good.

If possible, perhaps you can ask your conversational partners what you were like talking to them. If they're nice, they can give you pointers with what you're doing wrong, if anything.

It doesn't matter how long it lasts as long as it's meaningful.
Bingo. :thumbup:
 

xDreamseller

Well-known member
It's funny, conversing is easier for me online than in person. In person I've a horrible time keeping a conversation alive. Most of my old friends talked enough for my involvement to not really matter, which is one of the reasons we're no longer friends.

Same for me, I just sort of faded into the background. I felt like I was just there, watching them sometimes instead of actually being part of things.
 
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