Can You Guys Relate to CoWorkers?

hobo10

hobo10

Member
I know this question must have been asked a million times but how do you guys deal with your coworkers?

I just feel like my coworkers and I have nothing in common. They like to party, go out, drink, club, are into sports and MMA, watch movies, they are all really outgoing....a lot of em have kids too...

And then there is me...I like to play video games, stay inside, read Wikipedia, and draw. I rarely ever get out. Also, I am a huge Disney enthusuast. HUGE. Whenever someone mentions something Disney, I go crazy.

What is there to say when you have no common ground?
 
G

God_help_Us

Active member
That's happened before. I find there's usually only a few people I can relate to at any given job. Last one I was at, everyone was a loud mouth sports enthusiast, so we didn't have all that much in common.
 
lithiumflower

lithiumflower

Well-known member
My coworkers are just like that. I'm horrible with small talk so most of the time I just keep my headphones on and stay in my own world, unless of course I'm asked a question.

I'm training a new person today in the office and I hate having to do this. I tend to feel inferior to others at work and even in a position to train someone else I feel like I don't know what I'm doing.

But yeah, I often hear my female coworkers doing nothing but talking about their kids and the male coworkers tend to talk about drinking and sports. I usually just stay out of the conversations.
 
I

itay

Active member
God_help_Us said:
I find there's usually only a few people I can relate to at any given job
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Just like me!
I find that i can relate better to mild people:
the problem is when there's an agressive or worst frustrated person.
The biggest relation issues i've got are always with my supervisor or boss, you can pretty imagine that when i they are aggressive on top of it, i can't relate at all
 
F

FOR REAL

Banned
i always used to hide at work, i avoided all social events like the works xmas dinner, i never went into the canteen at lunch time and i never stayed to do any overtime.

one place i worked i was in charge of sorting the big air conditioning units which were on the roof of the building.
i used to sit up there and eat my dinner and stare at the sky, even when it was raining:)
 
D

da_illest101

Well-known member
except for the one who has SA and is somewhere in this site, i really can't relate to anyone, even when we have stuff in common i don't step in the conversation
 
hobo10

hobo10

Member
FOR REAL said:
i always used to hide at work, i avoided all social events like the works xmas dinner, i never went into the canteen at lunch time and i never stayed to do any overtime.

one place i worked i was in charge of sorting the big air conditioning units which were on the roof of the building.
i used to sit up there and eat my dinner and stare at the sky, even when it was raining:)
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Ugh, I freaking HATE the Christmas Party. I went the first year because I figured I should be a team player and it was terrible. There was basically only 1 girl I really talked to and whenever she went to the bathroom or went to talk to someone else, I felt so awkward and had nothing to do. Ugh.

This last year I pretended I had a pre-planned outing to go to.

I don't know what lie I'm going to conjure up this time around.
 
L

Liberty

Banned
hobo10 said:
I know this question must have been asked a million times but how do you guys deal with your coworkers?

I just feel like my coworkers and I have nothing in common. They like to party, go out, drink, club, are into sports and MMA, watch movies, they are all really outgoing....a lot of em have kids too...

And then there is me...I like to play video games, stay inside, read Wikipedia, and draw. I rarely ever get out. Also, I am a huge Disney enthusuast. HUGE. Whenever someone mentions something Disney, I go crazy.

What is there to say when you have no common ground?
Click to expand...

I have a big problem with this too. I mean actually love MMA and sports but my co-workers just want to go out and drink or go hang out at restaurants every single weekend. I've flaked out on like 20 planned outings so far and they are mega-pissed about it. I went once and it was absolutely terrible because I was so consumed by anxiety so I certainly won't do that again. But they take it as an insult and a sign of not caring or something along those lines that I don't go.

What's funny is that even before I had SP you wouldn't get me out to hang out with them either. **** them, gets on my nerves.
 
A

AGR

Well-known member
I can relate to some things,like they like drifting,they will always go friday or saturday night to see the drift,I rarely see a drift live only in videos,there are a lot of girls there,but unlike me they hit everything that moves even though they are married,so if I went with them I would probably criticised a lot,they are also really funny,but also they tend to pick on people,I dont really like to walk with people like that.....
 
recluse

recluse

Well-known member
I can relate to one o'r two atleast a bit but as soon as the convo turns to drinking/partying, sports etc i become the odd one out.

It just seems to me that every single human i encounter are into partying/drinking....Even the middle aged women who i work with.
 
hobo10

hobo10

Member
N04h said:
Yes they are all older than me.
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I love it when co-workers are way older than me. It makes me feel like it's okay that we don't have much in common and it's not so awkward for me. With people my own age though, it's pure torture.
 
lurknomore

lurknomore

1
hobo10 said:
I love it when co-workers are way older than me. It makes me feel like it's okay that we don't have much in common and it's not so awkward for me. With people my own age though, it's pure torture.
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Same here. It also works in the other direction to a certain extent... much younger coworkers aren't as intimidating for me to talk to either. With same age coworkers, I just feel too different- or inferior even.
 
J

Just Making It

Member
AWW man i thought I was the only one who felt like they couldnt relate to thier co-workers. When they makes jokes, i usually give a fake laugh but what i really want to do is just get away as fast as possible. I dont know why i have that feeling. And it seems like my co-workers are fake, they are good to me face to face, but I know they talk about me behind my bad... But what can I do? SMH
 
mrb

mrb

Well-known member
well the place i work has only 2 other people working in so its ok , but sometimes we do have other people in , the thing is with the removal Business is evrey one knows evreyone , when i first started in removals , i was sent with other firms , i hated that one time some bloke said oi mate you look paranoid its ok were not going to beat you up , i just said dont mix social phobia with being frightend of people mate , you dont worry me ... i hated myself for that remark , and he looked at me a bit strange , now evreyone who knows me knows im a bit weird around people in the removal business , ahhh sod it my family knows my gf knows , even my dog knows cos i told him ::eek:: ::p: but having said all that on the jobs themselves im great with customers ... how strange is that ..
 
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B

Badbuz

Well-known member
had_enough said:
My work has a list of everyones birthday and on your birthday they bring in a cake & sing happy birthday and make you blow out the candles and cut up the cake for everyone. I dread my birthday...
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that sounds like a good gesture gone horribly wrong : ) id hate that id be sick on my birthday every year.
 
lurknomore

lurknomore

1
mrb said:
but having said all that on the jobs themselves im great with customers ... how strange is that ..
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I don't think it's that strange. I work in customer service jobs, talking to people pretty much all day, and I know how to deal with people in regards to the job, what to say, how to deal with different situations, etc.- like I have a script (or a bunch of scripts) down pat. Even answering the phone is no problem, there is a set way to answer it, and a set way to deal with whatever people are calling about. But I'm silent when it comes to talking about anything not job related. Another reason you could be good with the customers is if you're only going to see them once or a few times... for some it is easier to relax and talk with strangers you're never going to see again.
 
L

Liberty

Banned
I'm very frustrated about my co-workers. I've been in CBT therapy and I've gotten better at 1-on-1 interaction but it's so frustrating. My therapist said that we train people how to treat us and the way I've trained my co-workers to treat me over the past few months before I got more comfortable is ****ing annoying as hell.

-They are all very short with me
-They don't make eye contact when speaking to me
-They don't wait for a response after asking me a question
-They don't listen to anything that I say
-They ask me something one second and then act as if I'm not even in the room anymore the next millisecond

Now I know that it's kind of silly to even complain about this because I know that I've trained them to treat me that way but I've been acting differently for several weeks and they haven't changed at all. Even when I give off hints that their behavior is weird.

Plus they talk about me behind my back endlessly about everything and they even just plain make-up stuff or come to wild conclusions about things that aren't even true and then tell each other about that BS. It's ****ing annoying.

Plus they complain non-stop that I don't attend team social gatherings. Of course I don't.

And I think they even know I have Social Phobia even though I haven't mentioned a word because every time someone talks to me they joke about having a phobia of some random thing and then someone else chimes in and calls me crazy.

There's a heavy price to pay for working in a team and suffering from Social Phobia.
 
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