Bullying Can be a Good Thing!

[madness_lover]

I get that mental abuse can help some to grow stronger and realize the dark side of humanity but in general it is NOT a good thing. I was bullied through ages 9-18 and it is the root of all my insecurity and social problems. Today, I was looking at my childhood pictures and the effect of bullying is impossible to deny. The earlier pictures you could see my bright and confident smile..I used to be a very happy person. In the older pictures it was a different story..I hardly smiled and when I did it was filled with sorrow, my eyes filled with pain. Negativity all around me. I hated having my picture taken and turned into a recluse. Missed out on a lot of things I wanted to do because of that insecurity. I regret that now. It has affected my adult life as well. So no, not a good thing.

If you could benefit from that I congratulate you, very few can do that. The only thing being an adult has taught me is that sometimes you just can't take life too seriously and not see everything as a personal attack. I see that having a healthy sense of humor is key to survival when dealing with people.

 

[Lionheart]

You will get depressions,no friends and other thinks...there is nothing positiv about Bullying

 

[KiaKaha]

I completely disagree with the OP. Bullying physically repulses me and gets me very angry. If there is one thing that can completely destroy a person it is bullying. I remember when I was in school there was a girl, who admittedly was not very attractive,(but she was still a person of worth) she was the perfect target for bully's. I can recall that she was followed around for weeks on end with a crowd chanting "Your ugly" day after day after day, along with other kinds of abuse... you cannot say something like that would effect a persons well being on every level.

bullying is unacceptable and its something I will never tolerate.

 

[emboki]

I completely disagree. If you get stabbed in the back by a knife you cant expect to get stronger now can you..

 

[mummylala]

Bullying by no means is a good thing, i was never bullied myself, in fact i always stood up for myself when the bullies of the school tried to pick me out as their next target.. ( i actually got into trouble once for standing up for myself, the bully tried to say that i was bulling him)

My 9yr old gets bullied a lot, and all because she was born with a cleft lip and palate, her confidence is nil and she hates school with a passion to the point where she is afraid to go.. We have a friend that was born with the exact same thing as her and he still cant forget about the things that were said and done to him..

When you have to deal with someone crying every day, someone screaming because they are afraid of school, someone who has now problems with learning and socialising and all because of bullying there is no way i can say its a good thing..

 

[Pookah]

My 9yr old gets bullied a lot, and all because she was born with a cleft lip and palate, her confidence is nil and she hates school with a passion to the point where she is afraid to go.. We have a friend that was born with the exact same thing as her and he still cant forget about the things that were said and done to him..

When you have to deal with someone crying every day, someone screaming because they are afraid of school, someone who has now problems with learning and socialising and all because of bullying there is no way i can say its a good thing..

Will she get surgery?

 

[bigrob]

*post deleted*

Katie makes a good point,lets try and respect other peoples views even if you do not agree with them,appreciate this can be a sore topic for people,but still keep it civil guys,thanks.-Danfalc

 

[agoraphobickatie]

it's obvious that the OP took a much more positive and stronger route to dealing with the bullying than most... not everyone is like that. are you guys having fun bullying him because he doesn't feel the same way you do? good job.

 

[xxaimsxx]

As much as it hurt me at the time i guess in a way i have learnt not to care now. I wouldnt kiss their feet though and say thanks for making me who i am today. Only i've done that. Not them.
It has its downsides for instance because im more paranoid now.

 

[mummylala]

Will she get surgery?

She has had a few surgeries already.. She gets bullied just because she has a scar and her nose is a bit out of shape(you dont really notice it though)

she went from this

To this

she is due to have a bone graft soon to fix her jaw and then will have her nose broken to straighten it

She will have surgery on her lip as and when she needs it through out her life

 

[BlackPuma]

I respectfully disagree. I've been bullied most of my life. If it wasn't directly, it was incidental by means of someone close to me being bullied and terrorized. It made me stronger in some aspects, but destroyed allot more then it has done good.

Everyone has his/her limit. And if that limit is passed, you can bet your sweet money it's going to leave some potentially serious damage. It is very likely they simply didn't push you far enough. It's not a matter of 'how strong', but more a matter of 'how much'.

Bullying should NEVER be applauded. It is a vile human trait that causes trauma's-, and robs children of their unique innocence more often then not.

 

[mummylala]

Bullying should NEVER be applauded. It is a vile human trait that causes trauma's-, and robs children of their unique innocence more often then not.

I agree 100% i couldnt have put that any better myself

 

[silentmom]

I have to disagree. I'm glad you got some good out of it. I was bullied in school and I quit at 16 because of it. I tried going back at 17, and quit again. I used to be a straight A student. I know part of it is my fault for being weak, but those kids are a lot of the reason why I didn't continue my education.

I feel like maybe I could have been more successful if it had not been for the bullying. I have a lot of issues with people now. It made a huge negative impact on my life. I guess some people just handle it differently.

 

[Danfalc]

Bullying should NEVER be applauded. It is a vile human trait that causes trauma's-, and robs children of their unique innocence more often then not.

I don't think the OP was trying to applaud it,just looking at it in a different light and maybe being able to leave it in the past and use the experiences for personal growth.

Kinda like therapy I guess,learning to let go of it eventually.

 

[Lea]

I would like to think there is something good about it, I was trying to find good points about me being terrorized at home by my father, but it´s nothing but plain ridiculous. If someone doesn´t believe me, come once to my house to experience it on your own skin.

 

[Danfalc]

Personally I don't think there is any good or positive about the act itself,but sadly it happens.However,how we choose to maybe deal with it and recover from it once we are in a position to that,can be a positive thing.

Easier said than done I know.

 

[Lea]

The only thing how to positively deal with it is to f**k off - if we can. The problem is, that we often cannot.

 

[Pookah]

She has had a few surgeries already.. She gets bullied just because she has a scar and her nose is a bit out of shape(you dont really notice it though)

she went from this

To this

she is due to have a bone graft soon to fix her jaw and then will have her nose broken to straighten it

She will have surgery on her lip as and when she needs it through out her life

She's a beautiful little girl. I wish the bullies' parents had taught their children better. :/

 

[sevenroses]

You got a point there. But I think the only good thing about being bullied is to feel extreme empathy towards people who have been bullied like yourself. That's just my opinion though.

 

[God_help_Us]

Its about making the most out of something that we went through, not about thanking those ****tards for ruining our highschool years.

Well put. I was thinking the same thing but couldn't find the words.