Being scared to talk on the phone

[Koime]

I'm really scared to call on the phone and answer phone calls. I think about my voice and how i talk all awkwardly and i'm always thinking "I wont know what to say". I wanted to call a movie theater I applied to a while back just to ask if the manager was going to be in and it took me an hour and a half to muster up the courage to do it. When I did call, the woman seemed weirded out and that made me feel kinda shitty about it. Today I need to call a personnel board about a police cadet program... and get information on it. I set an hour and a half timer and I'm planning to call after it but uuugh why does it scare me enough to have to do that. I'm sure it doesn't really help me at all to do something like that.

Would you classify that as anxiety..?

 

[jaim38]

Yes, this is called phone anxiety, and I have it too. Here's a good thread about this:

http://www.socialphobiaworld.com/phone-anxiety-12336/

 

[¯\(º_o)/¯]

I have the same issue, although I rarely am able to talk my self into it.
But I know that as soon as the call starts my anxiety always goes away. But I still can't seem to do it :/

 

[sahxox]

All I used to be able to hear was my heart rate and shaky voice... I'd procrastinate them all day/even weeks. :/ Last year, I had to organise a lot of things for my future university wise so was forced to make heaps. Then I had to do all the negotiation for buying a car under my Dad's guidance, which really pushed me out there. What helped me was realising these things;
1) You are just one of many people calling - they don't know who you are!
2) Don't take responsibility for others 'reactions'. I was extremely sensitive and still am I suppose and have to tell myself all the time that they're probably stuck in a crappy job or fighting with their spouse or whatever.
3) If I stuff up, instead of shutting down and stammering like I used to, I laugh it off... cos I actually find it funny, and if the other person's decent, they usually laugh as well. It's about allowing mistakes and lowering the standards.

One thing you could do is set a time and just call-up say 5 places in a row... could be bus timetable, enquiring about a sale in the paper etc. and allow yourself to be nervous but just do it... exposure is pain but past that it is growth.

 

[Opaline]

Yes, definitely anxiety. Does this happen in other situations or just on the phone?

 

[Quietguy11]

I had, and still have, to an extent, this telephonophobia. The same reasons as you displayed in your post are the reasons why I dislike talking on the phone. I think my voice sounds awkward when I talk, and I'm always fearing that I won't know what to talk about when I answer the call. It's anxiety because usually for me my heart will start racing really fast, and I will find it harder to talk and breath at the same time. What I'm learning is that no one hears your voice sounding awkward the way we hear it. To them, our voice sounds normal. I know this because I have asked people if they thought I talked awkwardly, and they told me that they didn't notice any abnormality in my voice at all. Just speak regardless to how you think you sound, despite how it sounds to you.

 

[MikeyC]

Yep, phone anxiety. It's not nice.

I will say that setting a timer is not a good idea, because you're leaving yourself the option of not doing it. The more you think about it, the less inclined you are to do it, so next time you have to make a call, do it quickly. Don't think, just do. Most calls last less than 3 minutes and are never as awful as we anticipate, so keep that in mind.

 

[Koime]

Yeah I gotta try and just DO it instead of putting things off. But I'm not really sure how many situations I get like this in. I'm very hesitant in a lot of situations and put a lot of pressure on myself which makes me kinda freak.