Being nice to people is a waste of time.

[MikeyC]

I don't know if people are a waste of time, but I definitely think that being nice is only setting yourself up to either be taken advantage of or ignored.

I often wish that I had been part of my parents generation instead of this one, because it seems like people have gotten a lot worse... it doesn't really matter if you're a good person, because just being good is boring... you also have to be edgy and usually vulgar as well. Manners and etiquette have definitely declined, and unless you're fantastically good-looking, your social value depends mostly on how loud or in-your-face you are... or even if you're willing to delight in cruelty to others.

If you go to countries that are more conservative, you will see what I mean. Plenty of places in the world still value things like modesty, intelligence and basic decency, but the west is the exact opposite.

This post is too vague and subjective.

You wish you were a part of your parents' generation? They had it just as hard, or worse, than we do. The next generation will yearn to be part of our generation, because we had respect, and the cycle will continue like that.

"Manners and etiquette have definitely declined." There's no proof of that. We just think that because the media shoves the opposite in our faces for all to see. If I'm nice to someone, I usually get niceness in return. Maybe that's just me?

I also don't think the Western world is the "exact opposite" and don't value modesty and intelligence.

I think you're hanging around the wrong people and watching the news too much to come to these wild conclusions.

 

[Odo]

You wish you were a part of your parents' generation? They had it just as hard, or worse, than we do. The next generation will yearn to be part of our generation, because we had respect, and the cycle will continue like that.

You can't be serious.

My dad took one inexpensive year of college, was hired immediately into his second job ever and rode that through to an early retirement with a house, two cars a pension and plenty of savings. He didn't have to worry about a great depression, or all of the local manufacturing moving to China… the only real issue that they had was the cold war… and that didn't happen.

To get the same kind of job nowadays you would need 4 years in college followed by a postgrad (enjoy your mountain of debt) and then you'd need to step over at least a hundred other applicants, at least 6 of whom have family or friends already working there. I just lost my eighth job, by the way.

And you do know about the Great Recession, right? That has set a lot of people back and permanently damaged a lot of formerly great industries, which in turn effects others through budget cuts and outsourcing. This has had VERY real effects on me and people that I know… the fact that you're saying it's not getting worse makes me think you live in a bubble or something.

I also do think that people are getting ruder AND I'm not convinced that you've ever actually been outside of your own country.

 

[Zod]

It's all relative.

Your perspective is that your dad may have had an easy ride, but who knows? Maybe he had his own troubles when you were not even born yet.
And sorry to pull a Godwin, but years before that, the world was at war, and an entire race was being systematically destroyed simply because of their heritage (so much for people being nicer in the past). Before that there was a great depression that was far worse then the one we have now. Before that there were thousands of years of bloodshed and all sorts of terrible things humans did to each other and social/economical catastrophies and natural disasters, on a personal scale as well as on a societal scale.

I don't believe anything's getting worser, I think the level of suffering in the world just fluctuates. Every generation has its own battles to fight, its own mountains to climb, and they probably all long for "better" times. Also it greatly varies per person and how they handle setbacks. Some people now are relatively happy and succesful without worrying about the Recession. Also, many of humanity's problems are really timeless and surface time and time again if you watch history or read about people in the past.

 

[Steelsoul]

I agree that being nice is letting others take advantage of you. You can't just expect somebody to be nice to you as you do the same to them. They might think you are too nice that you can't argue with them and you will do whatever they say. Soon they will be nice to you but who knows if they use you as a tool to get what they want?

Oh, and being nice isn't enough to join in conversation with people, especially if you weren't nice to them in the past.

@ Odo: i'm sure your father had his own problem about his work and he did't tell you. If not, i think he is a lucky one. Life in the past wasn't easy you know

 

[Odo]

It's all relative.

Your perspective is that your dad may have had an easy ride, but who knows? Maybe he had his own troubles when you were not even born yet.
And sorry to pull a Godwin, but years before that, the world was at war, and an entire race was being systematically destroyed simply because of their heritage (so much for people being nicer in the past). Before that there was a great depression that was far worse then the one we have now. Before that there were thousands of years of bloodshed and all sorts of terrible things humans did to each other and social/economical catastrophies and natural disasters, on a personal scale as well as on a societal scale.

That's why I said I wish I was part of my dad's generation, not my grandfather's. I'm not saying that this is the overall worst moment in all of history just that the idea that one generation couldn't possibly have it worse than another is wrong.

And my father agrees with me that he had it pretty easy… I don't know why everyone suddenly feels the need to tell me about my own father! And I'm not talking about job stress here (everyone has that), I'm talking about graduating high school into an actual career, as opposed to taking four years of university and then maybe if you're lucky getting a job in a related field.

 

[S_Spartan]

You can't be serious.

My dad took one inexpensive year of college, was hired immediately into his second job ever and rode that through to an early retirement with a house, two cars a pension and plenty of savings. He didn't have to worry about a great depression, or all of the local manufacturing moving to China… the only real issue that they had was the cold war… and that didn't happen.

To get the same kind of job nowadays you would need 4 years in college followed by a postgrad (enjoy your mountain of debt) and then you'd need to step over at least a hundred other applicants, at least 6 of whom have family or friends already working there. I just lost my eighth job, by the way.

And you do know about the Great Recession, right? That has set a lot of people back and permanently damaged a lot of formerly great industries, which in turn effects others through budget cuts and outsourcing. This has had VERY real effects on me and people that I know… the fact that you're saying it's not getting worse makes me think you live in a bubble or something.

I also do think that people are getting ruder AND I'm not convinced that you've ever actually been outside of your own country.

I agree with everything you said here completely but many people refuse to see it.

 

[S_Spartan]

People like "exciting" more than "nice". Many people just want to be entertained and believe that they are entitled to that.

 

[MBinMN]

People like "exciting" more than "nice". Many people just want to be entertained and believe that they are entitled to that.

Ha isnt THAT the truth...

Maybe I need to learn a juggling act with fire :applause:

 

[S_Spartan]

The problem is not that it's a waste of time to be nice to people. The problem is that you choose the wrong people to spend your time with.

So where exactly are these "nice" people who appreciate niceness? I'm my experience humans are made up of a collection of nice and nasty behaviors and everything in between. Everyone can be both nice AND nasty.

 

[jaim38]

The problem is not that it's a waste of time to be nice to people. The problem is that you choose the wrong people to spend your time with.

I think you have a point here. I want to be nice to people who will reciprocate/appreciate my kindness. I don't want to waste my time being nice to bullies or people who see my kindness as a weakness they can use.