Pacific_Loner
Pirate from the North Pole
I would like to know how many of you here are loners (people who enjoy being alone and need it), what is your opinion on being a loner in such an extrovert society and how you think it is perceived by fellow human beings.
Why I want to know is because, after I made some amazing progress in overcoming SA and depression about 3 years ago, I decided to embrace my lone wolf personality and stop pretending I was something else. So when I would leave alone on a road trip for the whole week end (or entire week!), instead of pretending I went with a friend like I used to, I would say I went alone. When people would ask me why I always eat by myself in the park, I would say lunch time is meant to take a break so I prefer eating alone and read a book or something. Etc.
People seemed unsettled at first, but I was already considered as odd, shy and awkward anyway. After a while they got used to it, friends (who already knew my ways), co-workers and family, and I didn't receive so many comments anymore such as "but you don't have friends? But why don't you have a boyfriend? aren't you lonely??" etc. And now I'm pretty much liked at work.
Then, a strange thing happened. some people, in my friend circle and at work, started coming to me for conversation about how they, as well, need to be alone, and they would like to do things alone but they are scared to be judged, etc.
So I think I would like to ask this question as well: I understand that it is unsane to keep ourselves isolated when we actually long for social contacts. But isn't it unwise to raise people into thinking that spending "too much" time alone, doing activities by yourself, is unsane, when it's actually very sane for a large amount of people (the introverts)?
Not sure I expressed myself clearly, I hope so
Why I want to know is because, after I made some amazing progress in overcoming SA and depression about 3 years ago, I decided to embrace my lone wolf personality and stop pretending I was something else. So when I would leave alone on a road trip for the whole week end (or entire week!), instead of pretending I went with a friend like I used to, I would say I went alone. When people would ask me why I always eat by myself in the park, I would say lunch time is meant to take a break so I prefer eating alone and read a book or something. Etc.
People seemed unsettled at first, but I was already considered as odd, shy and awkward anyway. After a while they got used to it, friends (who already knew my ways), co-workers and family, and I didn't receive so many comments anymore such as "but you don't have friends? But why don't you have a boyfriend? aren't you lonely??" etc. And now I'm pretty much liked at work.
Then, a strange thing happened. some people, in my friend circle and at work, started coming to me for conversation about how they, as well, need to be alone, and they would like to do things alone but they are scared to be judged, etc.
So I think I would like to ask this question as well: I understand that it is unsane to keep ourselves isolated when we actually long for social contacts. But isn't it unwise to raise people into thinking that spending "too much" time alone, doing activities by yourself, is unsane, when it's actually very sane for a large amount of people (the introverts)?
Not sure I expressed myself clearly, I hope so